[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
she’s 19. [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
she just got out of a long-term relationship.
[/quote]
o_0
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
Women think differently than men. Young women even more so. You may say “wow you look hot today” on Monday and she may very well turn around and say “Why thank you” but if you say it on Tuesday instead she will say “What? Does that mean I look like shit every other day?”[/quote]
Hahaha, so true.
I don’t do much complimenting for that exact reason. If she looks hot today, I’ll just act on that. That always gets the right response without the second guessing.
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I want to say, ‘Take your time and get your head right, but I don’t want to be texting every day. Here’s my email. you have my number. I leave in October. Hit me up if you want to meet up.’[/quote]
You’ll learn womenspeak in time, but what she will read is:
“I’m not willing to wait for you, at this point the only fulfilling thing about us is the potential to get my dick wet. So either come or find someone else who wants to be an emotional support.”
I could be wrong here, but I’m being honest when I say if this is something you want to see work out, saying the above is not how to accomplish that.
Women think differently than men. Young women even more so. You may say “wow you look hot today” on Monday and she may very well turn around and say “Why thank you” but if you say it on Tuesday instead she will say “What? Does that mean I look like shit every other day?”
It seems like you know what you want, and what you want to do to attempt to get it. Just go do it. If you’re mind is made up don’t look for validation. No one pays the consequences of your choice but you. [/quote]
I enjoy talking to her, but if all that will come of this is a pen pal relationship, I’d rather just end it now. I feel like what I’m doing is increasingly giving her hand in the relationship, which puts me in a position of weakness, which isn’t good. Men are supposed to be dominant, not wait for women to beckon them over.
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
Fast forward to this Sunday. I had a hectic week and weekend and I’m getting buzzed [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I don’t remember the details honestly on account of the drugs [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote
I joined the Marine Corps Reserve[/quote]
Smh, Devil Dog…
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
Fast forward to this Sunday. I had a hectic week and weekend and I’m getting buzzed [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I don’t remember the details honestly on account of the drugs [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote
I joined the Marine Corps Reserve[/quote]
Smh, Devil Dog…[/quote]
Like you’ve never smoked a joint and downed a 6-pack.
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
Fast forward to this Sunday. I had a hectic week and weekend and I’m getting buzzed [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I don’t remember the details honestly on account of the drugs [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote
I joined the Marine Corps Reserve[/quote]
Smh, Devil Dog…[/quote]
Like you’ve never smoked a joint and downed a 6-pack.[/quote]
I have never smoked a joint.
Have fun with that NJP.
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
Fast forward to this Sunday. I had a hectic week and weekend and I’m getting buzzed [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I don’t remember the details honestly on account of the drugs [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote
I joined the Marine Corps Reserve[/quote]
Smh, Devil Dog…[/quote]
Like you’ve never smoked a joint and downed a 6-pack.[/quote]
I have never smoked a joint.
Have fun with that NJP. [/quote]
Give it a try sometime. It’s fun. Don’t see how smoking a joint 2 months out from boot will get me an NJP. Moving on though.
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
Fast forward to this Sunday. I had a hectic week and weekend and I’m getting buzzed [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I don’t remember the details honestly on account of the drugs [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote
I joined the Marine Corps Reserve[/quote]
Smh, Devil Dog…[/quote]
Like you’ve never smoked a joint and downed a 6-pack.[/quote]
I have never smoked a joint.
Have fun with that NJP. [/quote]
Give it a try sometime. It’s fun. Don’t see how smoking a joint 2 months out from boot will get me an NJP. Moving on though.
[/quote]
You admitted to participating in an illegal activity. It won’t get you an NJP yet, but it could get your kicked out before you’ve even shipped to boot camp.
I’ve stood through more than my share of NJP’s for this exact thing. Including one at boot camp.
Fyi, you take a piss test during in-doc.
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
Fast forward to this Sunday. I had a hectic week and weekend and I’m getting buzzed [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I don’t remember the details honestly on account of the drugs [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote
I joined the Marine Corps Reserve[/quote]
Smh, Devil Dog…[/quote]
Like you’ve never smoked a joint and downed a 6-pack.[/quote]
I have never smoked a joint.
Have fun with that NJP. [/quote]
Give it a try sometime. It’s fun. Don’t see how smoking a joint 2 months out from boot will get me an NJP. Moving on though.
[/quote]
You admitted to participating in an illegal activity. It won’t get you an NJP yet, but it could get your kicked out before you’ve even shipped to boot camp.
I’ve stood through more than my share of NJP’s for this exact thing. Including one at boot camp.
Fyi, you take a piss test during in-doc. [/quote]
I already admitted to it and got a waiver. My recruiter told me to stop smoking a month out. I smoke maybe once in 6 weeks. Dude, it’s not a big deal.
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]usmccds423 wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
Fast forward to this Sunday. I had a hectic week and weekend and I’m getting buzzed [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I don’t remember the details honestly on account of the drugs [/quote]
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote
I joined the Marine Corps Reserve[/quote]
Smh, Devil Dog…[/quote]
Like you’ve never smoked a joint and downed a 6-pack.[/quote]
I have never smoked a joint.
Have fun with that NJP. [/quote]
Give it a try sometime. It’s fun. Don’t see how smoking a joint 2 months out from boot will get me an NJP. Moving on though.
[/quote]
You admitted to participating in an illegal activity. It won’t get you an NJP yet, but it could get your kicked out before you’ve even shipped to boot camp.
I’ve stood through more than my share of NJP’s for this exact thing. Including one at boot camp.
Fyi, you take a piss test during in-doc. [/quote]
I already admitted to it and got a waiver. My recruiter told me to stop smoking a month out. I smoke maybe once in 6 weeks. Dude, it’s not a big deal.[/quote]
I’m not busting your balls. I’m trying to look out for a future Marine.
I hope your recruiter told you to stop smoking, period.
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I want to say, ‘Take your time and get your head right, but I don’t want to be texting every day. Here’s my email. you have my number. I leave in October. Hit me up if you want to meet up.’[/quote]
You’ll learn womenspeak in time, but what she will read is:
“I’m not willing to wait for you, at this point the only fulfilling thing about us is the potential to get my dick wet. So either come or find someone else who wants to be an emotional support.”
I could be wrong here, but I’m being honest when I say if this is something you want to see work out, saying the above is not how to accomplish that.
Women think differently than men. Young women even more so. You may say “wow you look hot today” on Monday and she may very well turn around and say “Why thank you” but if you say it on Tuesday instead she will say “What? Does that mean I look like shit every other day?”
It seems like you know what you want, and what you want to do to attempt to get it. Just go do it. If you’re mind is made up don’t look for validation. No one pays the consequences of your choice but you. [/quote]
I enjoy talking to her, but if all that will come of this is a pen pal relationship, I’d rather just end it now. I feel like what I’m doing is increasingly giving her hand in the relationship, which puts me in a position of weakness, which isn’t good. Men are supposed to be dominant, not wait for women to beckon them over.[/quote]
This girl seems to be a lot smarter than I previously gave her credit for.
Read the bold part above. She won’t be wrong in that.
Look, wild guess here but it seems she is falling for you, and sees something very special in you. However she wants to know a) this isn’t just some meet up to fuck and its over b) you care about more than getting your dick wet as she wants this to turn into a real relationship that lasts.
You aren’t really giving off the vibes here I think she is looking to catch.
Working within her timeline =/= not being dominant. (Not that being dominant is something one should strive for, that is an entirely different thread.)
Look at it like this (and ladies please confirm):
If you pressure a chick into giving you a BJ before she is ready, not only will that BJ and ever subsequent BJ be awful, but you’ll ruin her for everyone forever until she meets a dude willing to work with her on it. Because she will resent you for “forcing her” to rush, and forever resent giving BJs.
The dude that works with her, and waits until she is ready will get a much better BJ, and she’ll enjoy learning how improve because the man she is giving it to shows his appreciation by waiting.
Vulgar analogy but I think it might actually sink in.
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
I want to say, ‘Take your time and get your head right, but I don’t want to be texting every day. Here’s my email. you have my number. I leave in October. Hit me up if you want to meet up.’[/quote]
You’ll learn womenspeak in time, but what she will read is:
“I’m not willing to wait for you, at this point the only fulfilling thing about us is the potential to get my dick wet. So either come or find someone else who wants to be an emotional support.”
I could be wrong here, but I’m being honest when I say if this is something you want to see work out, saying the above is not how to accomplish that.
Women think differently than men. Young women even more so. You may say “wow you look hot today” on Monday and she may very well turn around and say “Why thank you” but if you say it on Tuesday instead she will say “What? Does that mean I look like shit every other day?”
It seems like you know what you want, and what you want to do to attempt to get it. Just go do it. If you’re mind is made up don’t look for validation. No one pays the consequences of your choice but you. [/quote]
I enjoy talking to her, but if all that will come of this is a pen pal relationship, I’d rather just end it now. I feel like what I’m doing is increasingly giving her hand in the relationship, which puts me in a position of weakness, which isn’t good. Men are supposed to be dominant, not wait for women to beckon them over.[/quote]
This girl seems to be a lot smarter than I previously gave her credit for.
Read the bold part above. She won’t be wrong in that.
Look, wild guess here but it seems she is falling for you, and sees something very special in you. However she wants to know a) this isn’t just some meet up to fuck and its over b) you care about more than getting your dick wet as she wants this to turn into a real relationship that lasts.
You aren’t really giving off the vibes here I think she is looking to catch.
Working within her timeline =/= not being dominant. (Not that being dominant is something one should strive for, that is an entirely different thread.)
Look at it like this (and ladies please confirm):
If you pressure a chick into giving you a BJ before she is ready, not only will that BJ and ever subsequent BJ be awful, but you’ll ruin her for everyone forever until she meets a dude willing to work with her on it. Because she will resent you for “forcing her” to rush, and forever resent giving BJs.
The dude that works with her, and waits until she is ready will get a much better BJ, and she’ll enjoy learning how improve because the man she is giving it to shows his appreciation by waiting.
Vulgar analogy but I think it might actually sink in. [/quote]
What made you change your mind and think she’s smarter than you originally thought?
And I don’t know how to change the “vibe” I give off. I don’t think I want to either. I am who I am. Course of action?
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
Look at it like this (and ladies please confirm):
If you pressure a chick into giving you a BJ before she is ready, not only will that BJ and ever subsequent BJ be awful, but you’ll ruin her for everyone forever until she meets a dude willing to work with her on it. Because she will resent you for “forcing her” to rush, and forever resent giving BJs.
The dude that works with her, and waits until she is ready will get a much better BJ, and she’ll enjoy learning how improve because the man she is giving it to shows his appreciation by waiting.
Vulgar analogy but I think it might actually sink in. [/quote]
I think there’s some times where it’s ok to force her/pressure her to go outside her comfort zone, provided there’s sufficient positive reinforcement.
If you don’t, she may never “be ready”, at least with some things.
But the point is valid.
A first meeting is usually best with very low commitment levels anyway. Grabbing coffee/tea (i.e., going to Starbucks), or grabbing ice cream, can be a 10 minute meeting or last several hours depending on how it goes. Especially if she drives/gets a ride from someone, it lets her be in control of the situation.
If she’s not comfortable with that, assuming you’re in her town and just want to meet her in person, then I’m not sure I’d pursue this further at all.
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
What made you change your mind and think she’s smarter than you originally thought?[/quote]
Your dominate post kind of gives off a particular vibe, and if you’ve put in text those type feelings, expressed in that manor before with her, my money is this is a test of you by her, and she is very, very clever.
Flip a coin. While it’s in the air you’ll hope for one outcome over the other. That is the outcome you wanted all along. So do that one.
Don’t look at what side the coin lands on.
[quote]LoRez wrote:
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
Look at it like this (and ladies please confirm):
If you pressure a chick into giving you a BJ before she is ready, not only will that BJ and ever subsequent BJ be awful, but you’ll ruin her for everyone forever until she meets a dude willing to work with her on it. Because she will resent you for “forcing her” to rush, and forever resent giving BJs.
The dude that works with her, and waits until she is ready will get a much better BJ, and she’ll enjoy learning how improve because the man she is giving it to shows his appreciation by waiting.
Vulgar analogy but I think it might actually sink in. [/quote]
I think there’s some times where it’s ok to force her/pressure her to go outside her comfort zone, provided there’s sufficient positive reinforcement.
If you don’t, she may never “be ready”, at least with some things.
But the point is valid.
A first meeting is usually best with very low commitment levels anyway. Grabbing coffee/tea (i.e., going to Starbucks), or grabbing ice cream, can be a 10 minute meeting or last several hours depending on how it goes. Especially if she drives/gets a ride from someone, it lets her be in control of the situation.
If she’s not comfortable with that, assuming you’re in her town and just want to meet her in person, then I’m not sure I’d pursue this further at all.[/quote]
We live over an hour apart.
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
What made you change your mind and think she’s smarter than you originally thought?[/quote]
Your dominate post kind of gives off a particular vibe, and if you’ve put in text those type feelings, expressed in that manor before with her, my money is this is a test of you by her, and she is very, very clever.
Flip a coin. While it’s in the air you’ll hope for one outcome over the other. That is the outcome you wanted all along. So do that one.
Don’t look at what side the coin lands on.
[/quote]
So what’s the test then, Yoda? I just wanna meet this girl. I like her. Why is this so complicated.
[quote]LoRez wrote:
I think there’s some times where it’s ok to force her/pressure her to go outside her comfort zone, provided there’s sufficient positive reinforcement.
If you don’t, she may never “be ready”, at least with some things.
But the point is valid.[/quote]
For sure. We all need a nudge now and again to move forward in life.
However, and you get this, there is a fine line between being a cause for celebration and resentment.
I know how I respond to ultimatums lol.
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
So what’s the test then, Yoda? [/quote]
She wants to see one or more of the following:
-
That you are willing to wait for her to “find herself emotionally”. Which means you’ll be supportive and understanding. She essentially wants to make sure you aren’t a selfish person.
-
That you are patient and willing to go over and above for what you see between you two.
-
She wants to make sure that what she wants and needs is important.
-
She wants you to be her bitch.
-
She wants you to prove, through waiting, that you aren’t going to just try and fuck her the moment you see her, and never contact her again afterwards.
There could be other things too, could be all of it.
lol, then relax and see what happens.
Because a woman is involved. Get used to it.
It becomes the best part actually. Getting laid is getting laid. The ones that bend over for you right away are nothing but tales you tell over beers that no one believes, assuming you even remember half of them. The ones that make it complicated and make you work, are the ones that change your life.
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
What made you change your mind and think she’s smarter than you originally thought?[/quote]
Your dominate post kind of gives off a particular vibe, and if you’ve put in text those type feelings, expressed in that manor before with her, my money is this is a test of you by her, and she is very, very clever.
[/quote]
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]ChicagoLad wrote:
So what’s the test then, Yoda? [/quote]
She wants to see one or more of the following:
-
That you are willing to wait for her to “find herself emotionally”. Which means you’ll be supportive and understanding. She essentially wants to make sure you aren’t a selfish person.
-
That you are patient and willing to go over and above for what you see between you two.
-
She wants to make sure that what she wants and needs is important.
-
She wants you to be her bitch.
-
She wants you to prove, through waiting, that you aren’t going to just try and fuck her the moment you see her, and never contact her again afterwards.
There could be other things too, could be all of it.
lol, then relax and see what happens.
Because a woman is involved. Get used to it.
It becomes the best part actually. Getting laid is getting laid. The ones that bend over for you right away are nothing but tales you tell over beers that no one believes, assuming you even remember half of them. The ones that make it complicated and make you work, are the ones that change your life.
[/quote]
I’m not trying to just get laid. I already have FWBs for that. I actually like this girl a lot. Which is weird for someone I’ve never even met. I just don’t really get emotional often and this is weird for me, so I don’t wanna fuck it up. no homo