My family sucks at health. My mom kind of figured it out and just eats less and eats more protein, works out occasionally, and she doesn’t go hungry and her weight is under control. You basically can’t be in the same room as my sister without her screaming, and mentioning anything about food (even like, describing something as healthy) in her proximity would be cause for a multi hour full family fight of screaming hysteria. She can’t be near if I mention anything trying to help my dad, and just hearing from my mom or someone that I was going to try to get him to eat healthier would make her ANGRY. Yeah, she would actually get angry and try to thwart my plans of trying to help my dad. So that’s the environment we’re in. It is bad.
My concern is my dad. He has maintained his weight (300-315 range) for several years. He’s a big guy, 6’4 and big framed, so it isn’t incredibly horrible and he carries it well, but he needs to lose the weight and has some health issues from it as a result. Including needing a surgery that he’s been holding off until he loses some weight, which just isn’t happening.
He’s been trying to lose it the whole time, more ambitiously the past few years, with zero success. He’s really smart and has a ridiculously comprehensive physiology/biology education with a PHD and all of that shit but just won’t make a commitment and can’t can’t implement anything. He has a completely warped idea of how much he eats and what he needs to eat to lose weight and just ignores the issue for months at a time, then he’ll drop ten pounds and eventually gain it back over and over, never even coming close to implementing any dietary plan. For years.
The only thing he’ll do is try and eat a little less and fail. He tries to do low intensity cardio and that lets him maintain or lose a little, but has a busy job and inevitably stops and gains it back. He’s afraid to do any lifting because he’s old (early 50s) and has a back issue that hurts him (bone spurs), plus his slight irregular heartbeat, plus occasional shoulder/rotator pain and a past knee injury, etc. He can’t do hard cardio either, he just walks and does light stationary biking- that may be for the best and I think diet is the big big issue. I had him do some mobility once and have an ok idea of how the back issue causes him problems, but not what it means, so if anyone has more detailed advice I can elaborate there but it’s pretty nasty.
He has no meal plan and just doesn’t eat sometimes, snacking until dinner most days ( I think). I have no success in getting him to say what he’s eaten and he doesn’t track it and has selective memory and no concept of calories or anything anyway.
I have no desire to make him follow any strict plan. I just want to see him eat less and make healthier food selections, and I know he’d show huge results.
I just don’t know what I can do to get him to change. Tried bothering him about it, backing off of it, general advice, really not bothering him too frequently but it doesn’t make a difference at all.
I know it isn’t my job to control anyone’s lives, but he is just spinning out of control and the only thing that’s going to change anything might be something terrible.
I was hoping some people here would have good stories and recommendations to help.