before telling you my story please be patient with me I am not here to be blamed for not being educated about what I was doing I know I made a mistake.
I just need your help and advice.
I am now 23 years old.
My story began last year in July after corona lockdown when gyms were closed for 2 months and then opened again, I felt like these two months were going to kill all my gains.
During these two months I started to wonder about steroids what are they and after reading a little bit about them I felt that they just have side effects that can be reversed by other drugs and nothing serious so I decided to do a steroid cycle.
Although I was back to the same level just in a month after gyms were opened I insisted on trying steroids I said to myself it won’t be a killer they won’t be much more dangerous than smoking and drinking and if my natty test went down by 2 or 3 percent after cycle it will still higher than other people who have unhealthy lifestyle, I was so arrogant about my natty test, I never felt sore after any gym session, had very high libido, easily able to masturbate 10-12 times a week with very good erection and shitloads of cum all signs of having high test levels.
I was in a good shape not too much fat, decent amount of muscle trained for 3 years before that time.
I asked a couch in the gym to give me steroids and I told him I want the shortest cycle possible something like 4 weeks - again I didn’t know at that time anything about them I thought I can just use them for 4 weeks and I will be turned to a monster-.
The coach gave me test C and primo he said you can take 3ml every week of each and then do a PCT.
I was so nervous about what I am doing I felt like I would kill myself so I decided to visit a doctor and ask him for an advice if I am going to do this anyway what can he tell me?!
I didn’t know which doctor I had to go to so I went to a urologist - I didn’t even know what the endocrine system is and what is endocrinology-
Instead of being guided by the doctor I was misguided more by him and lead to more complications, if you go to any doctor here in the middle east you won’t leave without a prescription and another appointment, and he prescribed me Nebido test he said that is a safer alternative for the drugs you want to use.
I was so naïve I said ok I will take it, it definitely won’t hurt after that I found some forums and then I started to understand what I was doing and I realized that I only took a small dose of test that has a very long ester which is completely the opposite of what I want.
So again I added with it the test C and the primo that the coach gave me for 4 weeks and I added HCG and arimidex and then waited till November - 17 weeks after the Nebido injection-
In summary to what I did,
I took nebido in July. Few days later I added HCG 500 IU EOD, 0.5 mg arimidex, test C 750 mg ew primo 300mg ew and then stopped completely in august and waited till November - 17 weeks after taking nebido - to test my blood and see what happened and my test was 214ng/dl
At that time I took 750IU EOD 4500iu in total and started taking clomid and nolva for 7 weeks I took aromasin 4 tablets in total in the last 2 weeks of my PCT and retested my test again and it was 1350ng/dl.
but since I stopped my PCT I am gaining too much fat and feel sore and have low libido every time I take a tablet of aromasin I have better sex drive and better erection -almost two days after taking it for few days- and then feel bad again so I kept taking almost a tablet every 10-15 days the last pill I took was on 8th of may.
I still didn’t test when I will test I will show you the results I will test only TT, E2, LH.
So my questions are:
1- Is it dangerous to keep taking aromasin in this frequency even if it makes me feel better? I am afraid that it may lead to desensitization in the pituitary gland.
2- Can I be in calorie deficit if my test was just at the lower end of the normal levels?
3- Do I still have hope to feel like my old self?