T Nation

funny gym stories!!

So I’ve read all the posts about everyones pet peeves in the gym and what pisses them off but what about the funny stuff that happens at the gym. I was at the gym with my friend , he just goes there to hang out with his friends, so anyways they were on the stationary bicycle and there was a really, really hot girl doing some hip abduction thing in front of them and he started using his body momentum to push the stationary bicycle forward, he got it moved almost 20 feet up to right next to her, got off the bike, wiped his brow and said “whew, thats the farthest I’ve ever gotten” and pulled the bike back to its place. It ruined my whole work out I was laughing so hard. So anyone have any other funny gym stories to share?

Can’t think of one right off the top of my head, but that one was pretty good!

In University I had a football teammate who was about 6’2, 320lbs. His name was Gus and he benched over 500lbs and squated close to 700lbs. He was a monster of a man. One afternoon at the gym he loads the bench up with 6 plates a side. He then sits on the bench and starts this big psych up. The whole gym stops to watch. Part way through the verbal psych up he shouts “no” and walks into the change room. About 3 mins. later he comes out and restarts his psych up routine only to again shout “no” and walks into the dressing room. Again he comes out about 3 min. later and starts into his routine again. By now nobody has done a thing for the last 10 mins. and everyone is waiting in anticipation for the big lift. Again, Gus shouts “no” and stomps off into the change room again. Everyone is patiently waiting for his return, hoping to see this huge bench press. This time when Gus comes out of the change room he’s in his street clothes with his gym bag over his shoulder. He waves and says bye to everyone and walks out of the gym. There had to have been about 30 people their just standing and waiting in anticipation for this big lift. Nobody knew quite what to say. Of course those of us who knew Gus thought it was very funny and classic Gus.

I’ve seen plenty of funny shit happen in the gym (although some it could have resulted in serious injury )in my time both as a member and as an instructor. Two particlar incidents do stick in my mind however -
The first occurred when I was working as an instructor. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, around midday, when the gym was relatively quiet, we would take on a group of “special needs” students, who had various forms of mental handicaps( sorry, I have no idea what the politically correct terminology for these people is in the U.S. ). They ranged in age from about 15 - 50, and we would take them in groups of 10 or so. Some of them we quite indepentdant, others needed full time carers.The largest of the group was about 30 years old,6’2’, 330lb and usually quite docile. He did, however have a full time carer, who warned me on their first visit that he was occasionally prone to outbursts of temper. But no problem, he said, the remedy to this was, if he started to arc up, catch his attention, call him a name and then run. What would then happen is the big fella would immediately chase the name caller, but because of his ponderous size & state of fitness sooner rather than later run out of breath & collapse in a heap and in short order calm down. Nothing of the sort happened for the best part of two months & I’d all but forgotten about the warning. On the particular day in question The big fella ( his name was John ) was half way through his 3 partial rep set of bench press with an empty bar. Despite his size, John was shit scared of the weights and no ammount of encouragement could get him to display any sort of strength whatsoever. Well, another one of the group, sadly lacking in social graces, started to tease John about his lack of performance, and getting no responce from John ( who was turning purple under the empty bar and couldn’t reply ) started to call John names. John’s carer racked the bar and John got up while the name calling continued - and John turned to face his antagonizer. The name caller saw the look in Johns eyes and shit himself - and started to run. Big mistake. I really don’t know how to describe it fully, you really had to be there. Once John started to chase him all hell broke loose and most of the others in the group panicked ( hey, a crazy 330lb man running around in a gym with the intent to kill is something to panic about ) and they all started to run out of his way. Now John was chasing everybody - and this brings me to the best bit. Once out of breath ( it took a couple of minutes ) and having knocked over everything in the gym that wasn’t bolted down, John stopped by the dumbell rack.Too out of breath to run any further, he spied the original source of his displeasure cowering in the far corner, and picked, in his right hand, a 90lb dumbell. And threw it, overhand, flat trajectory, 30 feet across the room. i shit you not, the dumbell did not loose any altitude whatsoever. Flat trajectory, 30 feet. If the name caller had been standing up, it would have beaned him. As it was, it smashed into the wall above him, and dropped on top of him, collecting him on the shoulder.
I never did see him or John again in the gym, but it’s a display of strenght that I’ll never forget.
The second incident was more of an embarrassing moment for me, I suppose it would have been funny for everyone else.
While doing DB overhead triceps extensions, this hot chick comes into the gym and heads fo r the squat rack. I was on my last set, very tired, but decided that since she was in cut off shorts and cut off T-shirt I’d bang out another set or two so I could do some serious perving. I’m facing away from her but have a decent view in the mirror. She starts squatting, powerlift style, ass out way behind her, tits forward, real deep. What a goddess. Anyway, the shorts ride up the crack of her assl and the cut T-shirt is so short that her tits are peaking out from under it at the bottom of each rep. I slip into a deep trace and begin drooling uncontrollably. Totally mesmerized, my tricep gives out and I drop the DB ( I think it was about 60lb ) on my head, splitting it open wildly. Not only did I have to leave the gym immedately, I had to tell the ER nurse how the injury came about. It required 4 stitches.

As Nelson would say
HA HA
(Nelson from The Simpsons)

Okay, I didn’t see this myself, but it happened to a guy I used to work out with. He was a personal trainer and was working with this female client. He was having her do some front delt raises, but her arms got so tired that she couldn’t even do the three pound weights. So he had her just raise her arm up in the motion, just using the arm’s weight as resistance. Of course, she’s just giving it all she has and he actually has to help her. Okay, this is the (really) funny part. I guess there were a couple of guys just watching what was going on and, sure enough, five minutes later, they’re staring at themselves in the mirror, lifting up their own arms. I guess they were just flexing everything and giving their best mean look. 'Spose they thought this trainer knew the next great method. Morons.

I seen a newbie trying to leg press on the standing calf machine.

well this isnt a funny story, but at my gym, there is a guy there named Dee Bohl. im just waiting for his sister, Sue Stonin to start working out

Maybe its just me, but I don’t think you should need a spot when your doing shoulder presses in the Smith machine. Kept chuckling over that the rest of my workout.

a friend of mine who had just starting working out decided to try benching. he was a pretty small guy and after a couple of weeks worked up to doing about 120 pounds. anyway, i was spotting him on his first set and everything was going great. he was going for ten reps and already had the first 3 out nicely. somehow on the forth one the bar just went forward really fast, almost like he was trying to make it go forward. i couldnt stop the damn thing cause it was just going too fast. the bar came right down on his crotch… dont think anything more needs to be said