T Nation

Funny Experience


I thought I'd post this cause it made me shit a brick laughing.

Around Christmas 2005 re-thought the whole functional muscle/strength shit I believed ala Pavel. Then I found T-Nation. I started at a manorexic 120 and have since made it past 170 (approaching 180)

Fast forward to Friday, I went to the doctors for what I thought was a checkup. It, however, was a fuckin intervention for steroids. It was hilarious as I am not even on any. They spit out all this bullshit info and even questioned my Spike, Powerdrive, Alpha Male and creatine. Now I have to go for a fucking blood and urine test on monday.

Please feel free to share any similar humorous experiences.


who set this up?


My old man took off when I was 16. Went out for milk on Thanksgiving evening and didn't bother coming home... moved in with his mistress instead. (Almost 20 years ago now) So, needless to say, I was an angry young man.

I'd been told my whole life how slow, weak, stupid, and worthless I was. With the old man gone, and all the tales of what a great man he was proven to be a lie, I began to see that the lack of self worth instilled in me might be based on lies as well. I had a shitty little plastic/concrete York set, and shiny chrome home gym thingee with about 120 lbs of plates, both dusty from lack of use. When the old man split, I was about 145 lbs at 6'3"... so damned skinny I could suck in my gut, and you could count my ribs all the way up the the collarbone. Sickly looking.

I started coming home from school early so I'd have alone time, and I'd lift until I'd puke. Then sometimes lift some more. We didn't have much in the way of food around the house since we were dead broke, but in spite of starving my ass off, I still managed to pack on 15-20 lbs of muscle over the next couple months.

So my uncle pulls my mother aside one day, and has a concerned talk with her -- worried that I was on steroids! :smiley: Man, imagine how they would've flipped out I'd had enough to eat, too! People who don't know jack about training have some odd ideas about gains.


Who is making you do this?

Your parents?


Sounds like some over-sensitive and ignorant adults need an education in the power of the adolescent body and it's ability to adapt and grow. Retards. Sorry for your situation bud.


Yeah my parents are making me do this. I live at home cause I am in university. There gonna shit themselves when the test show I am not on the evil steroids.


My roomate's college fraternity had flag football shirts that read "No, Im not on steroids, but thanks for asking"

but from his account, the real joke was that they all were notorious juicers.


Let me get this straight... You gained 50 lbs. in 3 months?


~16 months...math is hard.

Nice work man! keep it up.


When the test comes back negative, act all hurt that they don't trust you and work them over.


Apparantly math is hard. I'm confused. How do you read 16 months?

Christmas 2005 to present day; April 2006. 16 months? Am I missing something? Did I lose a year?


Also be prepared to deal with continued suspicion. If you're young, with pretty good T levels already, and taking Alpha Male, that may spike you into what's considered suspicious territory if you're doctor's one of the many who are touchy about testosterone.


Yes maths must be hard for you as it is now april 2006. Xmas 2005 was 4 months ago.

I'm impressed at gaining 50 pounds in 4 months. I'm not surprised people think you're on steroids as you've increased your mass by 25%.

If you're natural, take it as a compliment and keep doing what you're doing as those are very impressive gains.


Most excellent advice. You have been given a gold-plated get-out-of-jail-free card that will last the rest of their lives if you use it carefully.


Big. Old. Pissed off.


Yeah its been 4 months since I started lifting real weight. I was stuck in the idea of not gaining any non-functional muscle because of Pavel and his stupid ass books. I was actually dieting down with the nutritional info(if you can call them that) in the Body for Life book.

Basically I was lost. Then I found T-Nation and have been a convert ever since. When I get to my desired weight I'll post before and after photos.


Pavel may not be a popular guy around here, but just because you have changed your goals to gaining muscle size and getting bigger, don't go trashing someone that knows WAY more about strength training than you do, since you're still a young person with more to learn. I've used many of his principles of strength training and I find those fundamentals greatly enhance my training on any T-Nation program I might be using. If it weren't for Pavel, I wouldn't have found T-Nation. I found the link on his message board and came here. Every coach or trainer has something to offer. Just remember that. Use what works for you, and keep learning.

Also, Body For Life is a pretty good nutritional program for the average person that wants to get started. So don't rip it just because you may have moved on to something more complicated. Simple can be good too.


LoL; somehow I put a year in there...

/sits in corner with dunce hat on...


Excellent point. I know that a couple of the strongman competitors in Ontario have incorporated some of Pavel's ideas into their training, and benefitted greatly from it.


hah, awesome, we have some of that here too.

And great work Keaster, keep it up man!


Christmas 2005 was 3 months ago. Retard.