Focus and Fatties

I’ve noticed a number of people here hating on fat people for letting themselves go, having no discipline, etc, etc… I’m not saying it’s wrong, as I’m not the most politically correct person you’ll ever meet.

I can’t really empathize in their exact situation since I’ve been single digit bodyfat and reasonably muscular my whole life. Right now I’m currently 230lbs, 8% bf, @ 6’3, and I’ve pretty much stayed that way the last 13 years or so with minor improvement. I work damn hard at it too though with proper nutrition, exercise, research… it’s been a lifelong lifestyle and obsession.

But… I can empathize in other situations where I haven’t had razor sharp focus and discipline. My career aspirations didn’t come in to focus as soon as I’d liked, while my friends were leaps and bounds ahead of me in that department. I’m 29 not married, no kids, it took me much longer than most to get my university degree… Whatever, I’m not feeling sorry for myself I just trying to drive home a point or different perspective.

Is there any thing in your lives that is lacking compared to your peers with respect to lack of drive, discipline, time, or focus? It could be anything; money, career, relationships, education, recreation/leisure, travelling, happiness, etc…

Is being in shape a better quality to have than the others, or are we just full of pride? Not that there’s anything wrong with that. :slight_smile:

for me, it’s definatly career—I dislike mine very much.

I have chosen to take on many roles in my life…wife, mother, sister, best friend, competitor, etc. But I do not enjoy my 8-4 job.

As a matter of fact, my husband and I have been discussing possible career changes for me in the near future. I’m hoping they work out!

So there you go, I wasted 5 years of school, $$ on student loans, and 5 years in this crappy ass field to decide NOW that it’s just not for me!

You mentioned you were slow to find focus in your life. I think you may need to understand that those who weren’t may find you to be a little bit of a slacker. That doesn’t mean you are or that this is all there is to you. You might find someone who was very focused to be obsessed or “overly driven”.

Either way, it is a matter of perspective. I never had much of a problem with finding drive for what I wanted. Therefore, when I see people with no drive at all or those who don’t seem to actually even have any goals, I start thinking there are problems there.

You asked about peers. My goal isn’t to compare my life directly with people I grew up with in some effort to point out successes and failures. Even friends I have that haven’t really done much have areas where they might be “gifted” in. Internally, however, I will always think they could have done more if they pushed harder.

Any biases I have about someone who is overweight are not held for the person who is just carrying a little extra weight. That is simply a variance of normal. I do, however, find a huge fault in those who have literally become obese because there are usually warning signs along the way unless they were fat from childhood.

There is a huge difference between a guy with a gut and some guy who is now bedridden because he weighs 800lbs. The latter strikes me as lazy and ridiculous and usually points to some sort of disorder or major life issues.

The fat people who waddle when they walk or ride those scooters around Walmart strike me the same. It points to laziness in my eyes and I would have a hard time believing this person is truly motivated in much of anything in life.

[quote]maryjane wrote:
for me, it’s definatly career—I dislike mine very much.

I have chosen to take on many roles in my life…wife, mother, sister, best friend, competitor, etc. But I do not enjoy my 8-4 job.

As a matter of fact, my husband and I have been discussing possible career changes for me in the near future. I’m hoping they work out!

So there you go, I wasted 5 years of school, $$ on student loans, and 5 years in this crappy ass field to decide NOW that it’s just not for me! [/quote]

My guess is, that isn’t too uncommon. That doesn’t point to lack of drive or focus, however. That points to you siply finding out what you really enjoy doing over what you thought you needed to do.

[quote]Professor X wrote:
maryjane wrote:
for me, it’s definatly career—I dislike mine very much.

I have chosen to take on many roles in my life…wife, mother, sister, best friend, competitor, etc. But I do not enjoy my 8-4 job.

As a matter of fact, my husband and I have been discussing possible career changes for me in the near future. I’m hoping they work out!

So there you go, I wasted 5 years of school, $$ on student loans, and 5 years in this crappy ass field to decide NOW that it’s just not for me!

My guess is, that isn’t too uncommon. That doesn’t point to lack of drive or focus, however. That points to you siply finding out what you really enjoy doing over what you thought you needed to do.[/quote]

Agreed prof. and MJ I reckon that you will find that you are not alone. I am in a career that I mostly dislike now, and I want to do some thing that I love. I get very jealous of people like my wife who get excited about going to work. I also have study and $$ behind my current career but I take the attitude that it may appear to be a waste of time, study and $$ if I change now, but I cannot say that I would be the person that I am now without the study and the career to date and the opportunities that it has provided, so it has not necessarily been a bad thing.