T Nation

Fleshlight Anyone LOL

http://forums.joerogan.net/showthread.php?t=74612

LOL, worth a few LULz :smiley:

LMFAO!

I ACCIDENTALLY THE FLESHLIGHT!

THE WHOLE THING!

ROFLROFLROFL

Best thread EVER!

OMG!!!

I ACCIDENTALLY THE SQUAT RACK!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH

I was actually laughing out loud… really loud.

Some of 'em are tits, but I don’t get the “I accidentally the whole fleshlight” deal.

Fleshlight’s site is offline for me, so I can’t check it myself.

Anyone care to elaborate?

I like the coal mine one!

in that forum they start talking about “bloodninja” so I had to click on the link. Pure Awesome.

http://people.ambrosiasw.com/~andrew/funny/bloodcyber.html

It’s just a joke to piss the customer care people off. They can’t help a person who doesn’t give them a problem. Plus it doesn’t make any sense, so it’s fuckin hilarious.

For those of you too lazy to click on the link, this dude is trying to cyber sex with different people and just fucking with them.

example:

Bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don’t know how long I can keep it ready for you.
j_gurli13: thats ok. ok i’m a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
Bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
j_gurli13: haha, ok lets go.
j_gurli13: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
Bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
j_gurli13: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
j_gurli13: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
Bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don’t wear shirts.
j_gurli13: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it’s just part of the game.
Bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don’t play games. They fking charge your ass.
j_gurli13: stop, cmon be serious.
Bloodninja: It doesn’t get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
Bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
j_gurli13: thats it.
Bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
Bloodninja: F
k am I hard now.

Edit: I swear you won’t regret reading this shit. HAHAHAHAHAH

Partner6: So you’re really a 18 yr old girl right?
J-Dogg: Yeah, J for Julie.
Partner6: So whats with the “Dogg”
J-Dogg: Uh, It’s cause I’m into the latina gangs and shit. You know, rollin with tha homies and shit.
Partner6: Oh, uh ok thats cool. So you ever seen a gun?
J-Dogg: Yeah like I got 6 guns.
Partner6: Thats cool, so you wanna see my gun?
J-Dogg: hehe, of course baby.
Partner6: I pull off my pants and show you my “gun”.
J-Dogg: Ohh, it’s so big.
Partner6: Yeah, what you want to do?
J-Dogg: Umm, i guess stroke it or something.
Partner6: It likes that.
J-Dogg: aight.
Partner6: Keep talking to me baby…
J-Dogg: I kiss you on the mouth, hard, but then gently.
Partner6: Mmmm, daddy like.
J-Dogg: I unzip my pants…
Partner6: Yes, show me what you got.
J-Dogg: I pull out my schlong, and rub it on your breasts…
Partner6: WTF?!
J-Dogg: Oh st, I meant, your schlong! your schlong!
Partner6: I’ve had it with you queers trying to cyber me, I only f
k women…
J-Dogg: Sit just don’t shoot me man, I wasn’t serious about the guns I have, I’m unarmed!
Partner6: You dips
t.
J-Dogg: I whimper to myself…
J-Dogg: please don’t shoot me Mr.

[quote]dk44 wrote:
For those of you too lazy to click on the link, this dude is trying to cyber sex with different people and just fucking with them.

example:

Bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don’t know how long I can keep it ready for you.
j_gurli13: thats ok. ok i’m a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
Bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
j_gurli13: haha, ok lets go.
j_gurli13: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
Bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
j_gurli13: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
j_gurli13: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
Bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don’t wear shirts.
j_gurli13: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it’s just part of the game.
Bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don’t play games. They fking charge your ass.
j_gurli13: stop, cmon be serious.
Bloodninja: It doesn’t get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
Bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
j_gurli13: thats it.
Bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
Bloodninja: F
k am I hard now.

Edit: I swear you won’t regret reading this shit. HAHAHAHAHAH[/quote]

LMFAO!

Have you read the one where the guy is doin the cyber thing. She’s like, “I’m all ready in my red silk dress, what are you wearing?” “I’m in my stained sweats, my boxers feel full for the skid mark I just made”

ROFL

[quote]dk44 wrote:
in that forum they start talking about “bloodninja” so I had to click on the link. Pure Awesome.

http://people.ambrosiasw.com/~andrew/funny/bloodcyber.html [/quote]

That was funny! It reminds me of when I used to fuck with people in AOL chat rooms. I would say all kinds of weird shit just to see how they’d react and then I’d tell them to hit Alt+F4 to see a special ‘secret’.

[quote]AngryVader wrote:
dk44 wrote:
in that forum they start talking about “bloodninja” so I had to click on the link. Pure Awesome.

http://people.ambrosiasw.com/~andrew/funny/bloodcyber.html

That was funny! It reminds me of when I used to fuck with people in AOL chat rooms. I would say all kinds of weird shit just to see how they’d react and then I’d tell them to hit Alt+F4 to see a special ‘secret’.[/quote]

That was YOU!?!?!?!?!

This is the greatest fucking thing I have ever read on the internets:

Im crying no lie, this is the funniest shit ever…

On the fist link… there are no pics they are ‘unavailable’. Do you know why?

I.F.: My st is hard you ready to jump aboard?
1hOttYeVe: oh yea im so wet right now
I.F.: Why you just shower?
1hOttYeVe: no im wet for you
I.F.: Did you ever play with supersoakers when you were a kid? or that gator s
t you would dive and slide down, there was that badass pool at the end of it.
1hOttYeVe: What the fk are you talking about? You wanna cyber or not?
I.F.: I do! Sorry…I just didnt know why you were wet…then you say your wet for me, and im thinking I didnt even throw water on you…
I.F.: Im sorry lets continue!
1hOttYeVe: alright then…I walk over to you and start kissing your neck and chest
I.F.: I pop like 16 boners
1hOttYeVe: what the f
k!
I.F.: what?

THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST LOOL

Bloodninja: uh oh …going limp.
sweet17: Har
Bloodninja: You gotta do better than that!
Bloodninja: Your picture was really bad.
sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRR
this is the best i have seen in a long time

HARRRRRRR!!! lol

This wasn’t so funny earlier, but now that 2 joints are gone, yes, very funny!

[quote]ahzaz wrote:
I.F.: My st is hard you ready to jump aboard?
1hOttYeVe: oh yea im so wet right now
I.F.: Why you just shower?
1hOttYeVe: no im wet for you
I.F.: Did you ever play with supersoakers when you were a kid? or that gator s
t you would dive and slide down, there was that badass pool at the end of it.
1hOttYeVe: What the fk are you talking about? You wanna cyber or not?
I.F.: I do! Sorry…I just didnt know why you were wet…then you say your wet for me, and im thinking I didnt even throw water on you…
I.F.: Im sorry lets continue!
1hOttYeVe: alright then…I walk over to you and start kissing your neck and chest
I.F.: I pop like 16 boners
1hOttYeVe: what the f
k!
I.F.: what?

THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST LOOL[/quote]

Waterguns? Jehovasfitness, is this you? :smiley: