T Nation

Ever Receive Negative Comments?

we always hear how people are getting positive feedback from others, now its time too see the flip side have you ever caught any negative comments from others about your physique?

first negative thing i can remember is a couple months ago whilst waiting to board the train after emirates day(family day at the races) i noticed this cute girl standing next too me so we started chatting we were getting along well, then her friends come up too me and goes why dont you go back to your gorilla cage at the zoo?

also i seem too cop it a bit from my mum her ideal person would be an afl player lean with a little bit of muscle and doesnt agree with what im doing thinking im already too bulky at 105kg at 6’2

so anyone have any stories they can share?

Good one!

Well after losing about 40lbs with diet n exercise, the people that I know say nothing but WOW! However, a couple of weeks ago this girl in my class saw me eating some peanuts and said ‘‘u gotta stop eating that stuff, that’s why you fat’’

I’m 1.81cm tall and weigh 80.5kg(this morning:)) I admit there’s some extra fat around my waist but nothing that can be seen when I got clothes on. Not to mention, I look good!

I don’t wanna say nothing bad about her, (it just won’t suit a gentleman) but I no longer am and for sure DON’T look fat! It just pissed me off especially after going through a very significant transformation. What’s more, I consider it very important to be constructive, polite and kind(within realistic/reasonable limits) when you talk to people(esp. the ones you are NOT close friends with).

Nobody’s got the right the judge anyone and I think everybody should be careful about what they say to each other. Everybody is entitled to their opinion but that shouldn’t make it allright to say whatever u feel like. Put yourself in their shoes and think about how it�??d feel if someone said it to you.

Excuse my language but this b**ch just pops the fuck out and says someshit like that. as if I done asked her opinion! It’s even more aggrevating when you used to be fat. I mean just cause she short(1.55-60cm) don’t mean everybody around her is a giant. I try not to think of it but it just pissed me off. (forgot the gentleman code there, SORRY!) I didn’t get into it with her by the way.

I just asked: Who’s fat? Me?

-Yes, that stuff’s not good for you! (like she a damn nutrition specialist or someshit)

I just nodded and walked away.

What amazed me was how sensitive I’ve become to negative comments and criticism. Even from my close friends. How the hell did my self-esteem and mood get so vulnerable? What the fuck! It only takes a negative comment from someone and there goes my day??? It shouldn’t be like that.

But it IS amazing what a bitch negativity is! I mean 10 people can tell you that you look great but if one said that you might wanna get a new haircut, that’s all you’d think about. You’ll go and ask people what they think about your haircut.

I can go on with examples but I don’t wanna make it sound like a research on behaviour or psychology n’shit.

I don’t so much get negative comments but it seems like I have a lot of family that tries to hold me back. For example, I have lost around 90 pounds in the last few years and still have more to lose. I’m at the point now where I’m not a huge fat ass anymore but not ripped. When ever diet or exercise comes up in my family which seems to be often when I am around my whole family always asks why I am still on a diet.

I just give them the answer that I’m not on a diet but that I changed my lifestyle. I believe you should live a lifestyle and not live around a diet only to change back after you reach your goals, because you will lose them. So I get comments all the time of “oh you can eat this it is good for you.” Not so much negative but more of family trying to hold me back from reaching my goals.

[quote]Former Fat Boy wrote:
Good one!

Well after losing about 40lbs with diet n exercise, the people that I know say nothing but WOW! However, a couple of weeks ago this girl in my class saw me eating some peanuts and said ‘‘u gotta stop eating that stuff, that’s why you fat’’

I’m 1.81cm tall and weigh 80.5kg(this morning:)) I admit there’s some extra fat around my waist but nothing that can be seen when I got clothes on. Not to mention, I look good!

I don’t wanna say nothing bad about her, (it just won’t suit a gentleman) but I no longer am and for sure DON’T look fat! It just pissed me off especially after going through a very significant transformation. What’s more, I consider it very important to be constructive, polite and kind(within realistic/reasonable limits) when you talk to people(esp. the ones you are NOT close friends with).

Nobody’s got the right the judge anyone and I think everybody should be careful about what they say to each other. Everybody is entitled to their opinion but that shouldn’t make it allright to say whatever u feel like. Put yourself in their shoes and think about how it�??d feel if someone said it to you.

Excuse my language but this b**ch just pops the fuck out and says someshit like that. as if I done asked her opinion! It’s even more aggrevating when you used to be fat. I mean just cause she short(1.55-60cm) don’t mean everybody around her is a giant. I try not to think of it but it just pissed me off. (forgot the gentleman code there, SORRY!) I didn’t get into it with her by the way.

I just asked: Who’s fat? Me?

-Yes, that stuff’s not good for you! (like she a damn nutrition specialist or someshit)

I just nodded and walked away.

What amazed me was how sensitive I’ve become to negative comments and criticism. Even from my close friends. How the hell did my self-esteem and mood get so vulnerable? What the fuck! It only takes a negative comment from someone and there goes my day??? It shouldn’t be like that.

But it IS amazing what a bitch negativity is! I mean 10 people can tell you that you look great but if one said that you might wanna get a new haircut, that’s all you’d think about. You’ll go and ask people what they think about your haircut.

I can go on with examples but I don’t wanna make it sound like a research on behaviour or psychology n’shit.
[/quote]

From the sounds of it that girl wasn’t making fun of you but it was more of a neg. A comment given to lower someones social value lower than yours. It is given so the comment is not a burn on the person but in a joking sound. You just misread what she told you =)

[quote]jtg987 wrote:
we always hear how people are getting positive feedback from others, now its time too see the flip side have you ever caught any negative comments from others about your physique?

first negative thing i can remember is a couple months ago whilst waiting to board the train after emirates day(family day at the races) i noticed this cute girl standing next too me so we started chatting we were getting along well, then her friends come up too me and goes why dont you go back to your gorilla cage at the zoo?

also i seem too cop it a bit from my mum her ideal person would be an afl player lean with a little bit of muscle and doesnt agree with what im doing thinking im already too bulky at 105kg at 6’2

so anyone have any stories they can share?[/quote]

I think it is more of a fat issue than bulk. You may get negative comments about being big with fat, but I have never heard of a women not liking a big guy who is ripped. Most of the time it is just the difference between being big and ripped and big and fat.