T Nation

Drunk Russian Sleeps Off Knifing

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/7353025.stm

"A Russian man trying to sleep off a night of after-work drinking failed to notice a six-inch (15-cm) knife in his back - until his wife woke him up.

Yuri Lyalin, 53, took a bus home, ate breakfast and apparently slept like a baby before his spouse noticed a handle sticking out of his back.

He was rushed to casualty but doctors found no vital organs damaged.

Mr Lyalin shrugged the episode off but the drinking partner who stabbed him faces trial, Russian media report.

“Unique and intriguing the case may be, but the accused faces a severe punishment,” said Pavel Vorobyov, a deputy prosecutor in the northern city of Vologda.

‘We were drinking’

Mr Lyalin, an electrician, had spent the evening drinking with a watchman at his workplace when they got into an argument, Interfax news agency reports.

The morning found him waking up in the watchman’s office but instead of going back to work, he decided to take the bus home.

At home, Mr Lyalin had some sausage from the fridge and lay down to sleep, the Komsomolskaya Pravda newspaper says.

After a couple of hours, his wife noticed the handle sticking out of his back and called an ambulance.

Viktor Belov, a surgeon who treated him, found a kitchen knife in Mr Lyalin’s back but “by good fortune, it had gone through soft tissue without touching vital organs”.

His alleged attacker reported the crime to the police himself, Interfax adds. Mr Lyalin apparently feels fine and bears no ill-will.

“We were drinking and what doesn’t happen when you’re drunk?” he was quoted by Komsomolskaya Pravda as saying."

I like the fact that the guy wasn’t even angry about it. You have to be a badass to take a knife in the back and not even care.

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Wow! I have heard stories about people being hit over the head with bottles and vases, and not feeling it, but never anything like this.

[quote]bushidobadboy wrote:
mundele wrote:
I like the fact that the guy wasn’t even angry about it. You have to be a badass to take a knife in the back and not even care.

Or perhaps brain dead…

Bushy[/quote]
I think you’re probably right

[quote]mundele wrote:
‘We were drinking’
[/quote]

All good stories should either start with the above quoted text or include something about getting knifed. If one can include both themes in the same story then that someone must be a Russian.

“This one time when I got knifed after a night of drinking…”

That just makes me laugh…only in the motherland.

You’d have to be some kinda drunk…

I broke my hand while drunk and never felt it but that’s not quite a knife in the back.

In Soviet Russia you stab knife?

[quote]bushidobadboy wrote:
mundele wrote:
I like the fact that the guy wasn’t even angry about it. You have to be a badass to take a knife in the back and not even care.

Or perhaps brain dead…

Bushy[/quote]

My grandmother tells some great stories about working as a nurse back in Russia, and most of them involve knives and/or alcohol. The best one I heard was when this guy walked in with a knife in his forehead. I guess the blade went in-between the two frontal lobes of his brain and miraculously didn’t damage the part that contolled his ability to walk and talk. The way she told the story, the guy didn’t seem very upset, he was pretty matter-of-fact about it.

Actually, her best story was when she met my grandfather. The cops had brought him in for stitches, he’d been in some drunken brawl and took a few stabs in the arms. So while he’s sitting there, shit-faced and covered in blood, getting cleaned up/sewn up, with two cops in the room watching him and waiting to take him back to jail, he’s busy hitting on my grandmother, lol…

JR

[quote]analog_kid wrote:
In Soviet Russia you stab knife?[/quote]

In Soviet Russia drunk knife sleeps off you?

[quote]bushidobadboy wrote:
mundele wrote:
I like the fact that the guy wasn’t even angry about it. You have to be a badass to take a knife in the back and not even care.

Or perhaps brain dead…

Bushy[/quote]

No no, it’s definitely a bad ass thing.

I took a class about Russians last year… those fuckers know how to drink. I don’t doubt he was in an inebriated stupor that blocked any sort of pain. Funny story, though.

If this story won’t get you laid, nothing will.

[quote]SSC wrote:
I took a class about Russians last year… those fuckers know how to drink. I don’t doubt he was in an inebriated stupor that blocked any sort of pain. Funny story, though.[/quote]

You’re not kidding… try working with them in general construction .