T Nation

DontEvenReply.com

Pretty Ridiculously Funny Website

Basically the idea is: Guy goes on craigslist and other sites and does fake replies/posts…

Heres the archive:
http://www.dontevenreply.com/all.php

Heres a couple good one to start with:
http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=25
http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=32

Site isnt THAT new but figured lots havent heard of it…

It’s been posted, but yeah, pretty funny stuff.

that is great. Made my day.

Always a good laugh. The baseball tickets and making the guy apologize to his kid for saying fuck you to and him seeing it was pretty funny.

Ugh, my work blocked this site.
Any of you kind enough to copy and paste them in a PM for me?

[quote]BMellow wrote:
Pretty Ridiculously Funny Website

Basically the idea is: Guy goes on craigslist and other sites and does fake replies/posts…

Heres the archive:
http://www.dontevenreply.com/all.php

Heres a couple good one to start with:
http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=25
http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=32

Site isnt THAT new but figured lots havent heard of it…[/quote]

This is awesome

That’s some of the funniest shit I’ve ever seen.

Horse Farm was fucking hilarious.

PLEASE!!!

…just copy and paste. anyone!

FINE…

Original ad:
looking for a ride from wilmington to manhattan next wednesday, any time during the day is good. I will pay for all of your gas as compensation.
From Mike Anderson to @.org

Hello,

I am driving to NYC for a business meeting around 10 AM on Wednesday and would be able to give you a ride. Let me know if you still need one.

Mike

From Chris ******* to Me

mike, that sounds great. where do you want to meet to pick me up? i can meet you anywhere in wilmington. also, how much do you want for gas?

chris

Mike Anderson to Chris *******

Chris,

I shouldn’t need too much money for gas. I drive a Hummer H2 with a swapped motor, so gas really isn’t a problem. It gets about 4 MPG highway and only takes premium, so I’d say about $100 should cover it.

Mike

From Chris ******* to Me

what do you mean gas isnt a problem? 4 mpg is ridiculous. I was expecting to pay like 20 or 30 bucks tops! sorry but I’ll have to pass

Mike Anderson to Chris ********

If you only want to pay 30 bucks, that can get you as far as Exit 7 on the Jersey Turnpike. I can drop you off there, and you can hitchhike the rest of the way. I’m pretty sure hitchhiking is still legal in NJ so it shouldn’t be a problem for you. I can pick you up on Naaman’s Road in Wilmington by the Target shopping center around 9:30.

From Chris ******* to Me

are you serious? no I dont want to be dropped off in the middle of the turnpike. forget it

Mike Anderson to Chris ********

Okay, I can give you a ride to Manhattan for $30, but in return, we need to stop at this guy’s house in New Brunswick to get some money that he owes me. He’s been dodging my calls, so he probably won’t be too willing to give the money when we show up at his house. I need you to stand there and look intimidating so he realizes we mean business. How big are you? You should be at least 5’11 and 200 lbs. You can bring a big friend if you are scrawny, but you should ask him to throw up some gas money too.

From Chris ******* to Me

what the fuck is wrong with you? you sound like a drug dealer. i dont want to ride to manhattan with you

Mike Anderson to Chris ********

Chris, I’m sorry that you have turned down my ride. I think you should change your ad on ********** to avoid any further confusion. I re-wrote it for you so all you have to do is click “edit” and then paste this where the original ad is:

“scrawny man, not capable of intimidating people, looking for a ride from wilmington to new york. not willing to be reasonable in compensation for gas. will most likely complain about stupid stuff the whole ride up”

From Chris ******* to Me

fuck off asshole

Thought this one was hilarious

From Timmy Tucker to ***********@**********.org
RE: Swingset Assembly

Hey,

I saw you are looking for someone to assemble your wooden swing set. First off, I must say that a swing set is a horrible toy for a child. I had a swing set as a kid, and broke three of my ribs and tore my ACL on it. My career in little league soccer was ruined. I recommend that you get your child a sandbox. I have an old sandbox that I am not using, and would be willing to sell to you for $300. It is an awesome sandbox. It is shaped like a turtle, and the lid is part of the turtle too. It comes with beautiful sand filled from a beach on Coney Island, NY. Let me know if you are interested.

Tim

From John ******** to Me

i dont want your sandbox. i already bought the swingset for my kid and am sticking with that. its your own damn fault you got hurt on your swingset

From Timmy Tucker to John ******

John,

Actually it is not my fault. The swingset had a faulty design and the swing came off while I was in the air, and I was sent flying into oncoming traffic. I am lucky to be alive. If you do not want your son mangled by a Dodge Caravan, then you should buy my sandbox instead. Sandboxes are 100% safe.

Tim

From John ******** to Me

fuck your sandbox. i want my kid to have fun, not to sit in some dirty ass sand from new york. i am not an idiot and will not set up my swingset where my child can be thrown into oncoming traffic.

From Timmy Tucker to John ******

Well it sounds like you won’t set up your swingset at all without my help. Are you a quadriplegic? Why are you incapable of putting a swingset together?

If you are a quadriplegic and I have offended you, I am sorry. In that case, would you be interested in my sandbox for your crippled body to relax in? Seeing as you can’t use the swingset anyway, it would be way more practical for you.

From John ******** to Me

FUCK OFF STOP EMAILING ME

They’re all so good…

Original ad:
litter of 6 kittens up for adoption! they are all 3 weeks old and are looking for a good home. contact if interested.
From Mike Hunt to @**.org

Hi,

I am interested in taking all six kittens off of your hands. How much do you want for them?

Mike

From Shannon ******* to Me

Mike,

Are you going to take care of all of these kittens? I want to make sure they all find a good home, and was expecting to sell them one at a time. Are you able to house all six of them?

From Mike Hunt to Shannon *******

Shannon,

To be honest, I own a pet Bengal Tiger and he is on a strict diet of cats. I usually feed him one cat every couple of days, so this litter should hold him over for a while. Don’t worry though, I’ll take good care of the kittens until I feed them to him.

Mike

From Shannon ******* to Me

That is horrible! You will not get a single kitten from me. I really hope you are not serious.

From Mike Hunt to Shannon *******

Shannon,

I was kidding. I seriously need all six kittens though. Disregard anything I said about a tiger.

From Shannon ******* to Me

NO.

The post that Gmoore17 made was funny. That troll is unreal funny man.

This one is my favorite so far-

Original ad:
I WANT YOUR COUCH
IF ANYONE HAS AN UNWANTED COUCH I CAN COME GET IT. WILL TRAVEL UP TO 20 MINUTES FROM CONSHOHOCKEN. PLEASE SEND PICTURES. THANKS

From Me to *@.org:

Hi there! You can have my couch if you are still looking for one. Let me know! You can either e-mail me or call me.

Mike

From Juan ********* to Me:

HI MIKE

I STILL NEED YOUR COUCH.
HOW BIG IS IT?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PICTURES?
WHY DO YOU NOT WANT IT ANY MORE?

YOU DID NOT GIVE ME YOUR PHONE NUMBER SO I CANT CALL YOU.

From Me to Juan *********:

Juan,

The couch can seat three normal people, or two fat people. I don’t have any pictures because my camera is broken (I didn’t realize it was in the garbage disposal when I turned on the switch.)

I am getting rid of the couch because my grandfather passed away on it a few weeks ago. Every time I look at it, I am reminded of it, and I would rather it not be in my apartment anymore. Just give me a call and we can set up a time for you to come get it.

Mike

From Juan ********* to Me:

MIKE IS THE COUCH STILL IN GOOD CONDITION. YOU STILL DID NOT GIVE ME YOUR NUMBER.

From Me to Juan *********:

Juan,

The couch is still in very good condition. There are only a few minor blemishes, but you can’t really notice them. There is a little bit of blood on the couch and a pool of blood on the middle cushion from when my grandfather shot himself. I tried cleaning it with club soda, but it had really soaked into the fabric by the time I found him. The blood dried though, and now it is kind of a brown-ish color that I think actually makes the couch look better. It is a brown couch anyway so you can’t even notice it.

Mike

From Juan ********* to Me:

NO THANKS

From Me to Juan *********:

Why not? I thought we had a deal. Is it because of the blood? You can just turn the cushion over and nobody will have any idea.

From Juan ********* to Me:

THE COUCH IS COVERED IN BLOOD WHO WOULD WANT THAT?
GROSS!

From Me to Juan *********:

Don’t put words in my mouth. I never said it was covered in blood - it just has a little blood here and there.

I did forget to mention, I believe my grandfather defecated on the couch when he died (the paramedics say it happens all the time.) I cleaned most of that up, but once again the couch is brown so you won’t even notice it.

And this probably isn’t a big deal, but he also had a cigar in his mouth and when he died it set part of the couch on fire. On the plus side, it did burn away some of the old urine stains that the couch had on it. The couch no longer smells like urine. It kind of smells like a barbecue, which is great if you love barbecues.

From Juan ********* to Me:

THAT COUCH IS FUCKED
THROW IT OUT!

From Me to Juan *********:

Why would you waste my time if you weren’t going to take the couch? I’m sick of having to deal with people like you. I’m just trying to get rid of a decent couch, for free, and still people are wasting my time.

From Juan ********* to Me:

IF YOU TOLD ME UP FRONT THAT SOME ONE DIED AND SHIT ALL OVER YUOR COUCH THAN I WOULNT HAVE WASTED ANY MORE OF YOUR TIME!!
DONT YOU SPIN THIS ON ME BY TELING ME THE COUCH LOOKS GOOD WITH BLOOD OR SMELLS LIKE A BBQ. WHO THE FUCK WANTS A COUCCH THAT SMELLS LIKE BBQ IF I WANTED TO SMELL BBQ I WOULD BUY A FUCKING GRILL

From Me to Juan *********:

Would you be interested in the grill I am selling then? It is a CharCooker 500 and has three burners. Two of them don’t work because my grandfather shot at the grill when he was drunk, but the middle burner still cooks food really well. I’m asking $400 for it, and for you, I’ll throw in a couch for free.

From Juan ********* to Me:

I DONT WANT YOUR USELESS SHIT GUY!!!

hahahaha! That website is classic. You gotta read the ‘special wife’ one. hysterical. Just saw another troll blog that had some pretty funny ones- http://www.nedwingfield.com - the guy is pretty weird but very funny, along a simillar theme. fyi

This guy has to be the best troll to ever grace the internet.

simultaneously pissed and shit self.