Unfortunately I don’t know where this would go. But I’m in a horrible rut.
Here’s the problem guys.
I’m 155lbs at 5’9. I’m 18yrs old.
Before you start screaming tips at me. Realize that I keep a food log and document everything. I’m pretty damn well versed in exerscise science and the such. I’m a sophmore kinesiology major at USC… I started lifting religiously at about 17… i had always read Muscle & Fiction, but I didn’t get motivated till I started reading T-mag. I started weight training WITH T-Nation, my first program was the Limping Series. I’ve read every issue at least 4x… this is my damn homepage.
I’m like the T-Nation poster child…
Ripped like a thrift store sweater.
Unlike most common gym goers, my muscle imbalance is that my back is stronger than my chest.
I can bench 250, squat 350, deadlift 400… weighted pullup with 90lbs attached to a dipping belt. I can dip with 95lbs attached and I’m working up to body weight on both.
When I ran track I ran the 40yd in 4.31
I could run the 100m in 10.8 (10.79 to be exact)
I can do dragon flags, handstand pushups…I can OH Squat bodyweight 15x in a row… I can push press 200+ lbs (i haven’t maxed that yet)
Hell I can do a one handed handstand pushup (only 1 on my right hand… but the fact is I’ve accomplished it).
I’ve been so influenced by training that I changed my major from Computer Science and Physics to Kinesiology.
When I want to grow up (:-P) I want to be a cross between John Berardi, Chad Waterbury, and Christian Thibadeau.
But twice as handsome.
problem that I constantly run into is that I’m small… I"m just naturally tiny. I keep a fuckin religious food log… I train hardcore…
Hell I train 2x a day…at one point I was hitting the weights 3x a day. trying to illicit some sort of gains.
My CNS is all super-wired… I was able to run track, hit the gym 2x a day running westside for skinny bastards and Quattro Dynamo, AND go to jujutsu 3x a week and only feel DOMS on the endurance day of QD.
It’s not like I’m weak. Please believe I’m not weak, I crush 98% of people in my college weight room. Put me up against most people in almost any sport and I’ll run circles around you.
It’s not like I’m foolish about my nutrition.
It’s not like I have low T (i’m a fuckin walkin boner)…
I just didn’t know what it is… why can’t I get bigger!!!
I came to the point where I was fully convinced that I was going to get some steroids and start cycling… Yes at this age. I re-read all the steroid manifesto articles and the such. I found a distributor, a mule… everything.
I don’t know what triggered the change though…
I have a stack of training notes, just schedules I’ve made up, MMA related training stuff, notes, article clippings, printed T-mag stuff, old food log notebooks that is probably 4-4.5 feet tall.
I realized that all that work, all the time I’ve put into this hasn’t been a total waste. I am strong. I’m bigger than my dad was at my age.
Maybe I’ve fufilled my genetic potential.
Then I snapped… I got really angry at myself and started throwing things.
As long as I am still alive, my potential has NOT been realized. There is no end till THE end. Till you stick me 6ft under I’m still here.
The money that I was going to spend on steroids…I’m going to spend on weight gainer and food.
I’m going to take all the knowledge I’ve accumulated… all the time that I’ve spent… and make a one last ditch effort.
I’ll take my current food intake of 5000 calories a day and increase that by 2000+ calories with some weight gainer. I already have 2gm of protein/lb of bw.
And weight gainer is MUCH cheaper than steroids…
I’m going to transform myself. This is just the beginning. I’m going to take one solid year.
I’ve turned from stick to stone…
Now I’ll turn from stone to steel.
So thank you T-Nation for the information and the motivation that caused me to make the right decision and not totally fuck up my body by taking it on a a hormonal roller coaster at this age.