T Nation

Doing 'Shrooms with Ronnie Coleman



Weee! Look at all dem pretty colors! Trailin’ trailin’ trailssss…

: )

From my experience Ronnie likes going to parks at night and staring at the sky. If he goes into a bad trip give him a protein shake to settle him down.

Is that you football boy?

This guy be sellin’ sum o’ dat good shieeet. Yeah buddy! Light drugs!

An undercover DEA agent is seen pointing out Big Nasty’s drug stash.

Step 1: Aquire some Shrooms. Don’t leave them at home.

Step 2: Get a room at the Country Inn & Suites By Carlson Lewisville. Get a 3-Day reservation.

Step 3: Go to Metro-Flex for all the three days you are in town. The first day you go, Ask Brian Dobson if Ronnie is going to be coming in during the next 3 days.

Don’t call ahead and ask if he’ll be there. That’s just creepy. It makes it seem like you’re making a trip down to Texas for no other reason than to see Ronnie. That’s weird and you know it is. Don’t call Metroflex at 817-465-9331 and ask ahead of time. No one wants to trip with a creeper.

Step 4: Meet Ronnie in the gym. Talk to him.
Don’t just ask if he wants to go take some shrooms right off the bat. That would be creepy as well. You’re probably gonna have to be clever in bringing up shrooms with Ronnie. One one hand he’s a cop, but on the other he did do a fare amount of steroids.

Don’t forget to ask about his wife. He’s married now.

Let’s be realistic. Ronnie Coleman isn’t exactly Paris Hilton. It’s probably not too hard to run into him if you are in the Metroplex area.

Maybe you can do Shrooms with Branch if things with Ronnie Don’t work out.

Number one sign a person is under the influence of illicit substances: dilated pupils.

#2: a constant, shit-eating grin.

#3: excessive sweating.

Case in point:

Spending too much time in the evidence room? I honestly don’t know what you mean, captain Gordon.

Omigod omigod omigod the clowns are coming to eat me!!!

A drug transaction taking place.

Proof that drug abuse ages a person.

What the fuck is this guy on about??? why would you want to do shrooms with Ronnie Coleman??

Bumping meth ain’t easy…

Do you know where we can find some marijuana? We’re looking for marijuana.

There? I dunno man, I usually just shoot it between my knuckles. That’s why I wear lifting gloves all the damn time.

The munchies…