T Nation

Dog Sh*t and How to Deal With It

[quote]Karado wrote:
No one forced you to get involved with this bullshit in the first place, if you don’t like it
and don’t have half a brain to solve this fuckin’ thing, kindly tell that old hag to go fuck herself
and get an Iguana next time.
[/quote]

And I guess your reading comprehension skills are non-existent, because I’m not involved with bullshit. I’m involved with dog shit. Did you not notice the title of the thread?

Karado sounds like the type of guy who see’s queue jumpers at the supermarket and then goes home to post how he dealt with them when in fact he just went all angry like a powder puff and bitched out without saying a thing.

He isn’t forced to do this, he wants to do it, maybe a useless little runt like yourself doesn’t understand such a thing.

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
When i was a lil Rockula i was obsessed with oscar the grouch so i took some dog shit and smeared it on my neighbors forehead like a unibrow.

[/quote]

you’re my favourite

it might be worth hiring a dog behaviourist. Most dogs like to turd in a certain place, and this dog sounds like he’s behaving strangely to me.

You should be able to retrain it, it’ll just take time.

Unfortunately you aren’t going to have much success, since you’re not its owner. The best way is to have her leash him when he goes out & dedicate a area 5-7 days until it becomes routine. When he does business in the area designated, he’s rewarded. The only way this or any other habit you want the dog to learn is time.

The other option is to hire a company that picks it up. I know you’re on the West coast, but here in the East, it’s 7.00 once a week.

[quote]print wrote:
Unfortunately you aren’t going to have much success, since you’re not its owner. The best way is to have her leash him when he goes out & dedicate a area 5-7 days until it becomes routine. When he does business in the area designated, he’s rewarded. The only way this or any other habit you want the dog to learn is time.

The other option is to hire a company that picks it up. I know you’re on the West coast, but here in the East, it’s 7.00 once a week.[/quote]

Didn’t know they picked up poop in Poland.

[quote]print wrote:

The other option is to hire a company that picks it up. I know you’re on the West coast, but here in the East, it’s 7.00 once a week.[/quote]

I was going to suggest this. Totally worth it IMO.

[quote]batman730 wrote:

[quote]print wrote:

The other option is to hire a company that picks it up. I know you’re on the West coast, but here in the East, it’s 7.00 once a week.[/quote]

I was going to suggest this. Totally worth it IMO.
[/quote]

Jesus, that’s really cheap. Who the fuck do they get to clean up shit for $7? At that rate it must be a completely degrading job.

Of course, who am I to talk? I’m doing it for free.

[quote]rds63799 wrote:
it might be worth hiring a dog behaviourist. Most dogs like to turd in a certain place, and this dog sounds like he’s behaving strangely to me.

You should be able to retrain it, it’ll just take time.[/quote]

I worked in a big department store many years ago. At night they had this guy pull up in a van with 2 dobermans that would stay in the store all night. People were known to hide in storage areas and rob the store after it closed. He would feed them before he let them loose, they only took food from him. He also had these glorified pizza boxes that was essentially the dogs’ toilet. They were trained to crap in the box and nowhere else. In the morning, he’d come back for the dogs, fold up the boxes and go.

Not that the boxes would help in your case, but the training may help… or maybe not since the dog seems to be a serial shitter.

Rob

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]batman730 wrote:

[quote]print wrote:

The other option is to hire a company that picks it up. I know you’re on the West coast, but here in the East, it’s 7.00 once a week.[/quote]

I was going to suggest this. Totally worth it IMO.
[/quote]

Jesus, that’s really cheap. Who the fuck do they get to clean up shit for $7? At that rate it must be a completely degrading job.

Of course, who am I to talk? I’m doing it for free.[/quote]

They have the service by me, called something like “Doody Calls”, “Scoopy Doo” and “Poopie Hunter”. They advertise in the local free papers, starting out like $7 for a once-a-week pickup and it goes up for large dogs or more dogs or more frequent pickups.

I see the cars and trucks around now and then, one uses a Smart Car… eek. No idea where they unload the shit, gotta stink to high heaven in the summer.

Rob

[quote]beachguy498 wrote:
He would feed them before he let them loose, they only took food from him. He also had these glorified pizza boxes that was essentially the dogs’ toilet. They were trained to crap in the box and nowhere else. In the morning, he’d come back for the dogs, fold up the boxes and go.
Rob[/quote]

I bought my first ever dog recently so I have been doing a LOT of research (I was pretty scared by the whole thing) and the stuff you can train dogs to do is incredible. You can train them to ring a bell when they need to go out to the toilet! That’s cleverer than most humans.

Dog shit is not good for a lawn.

As far as how to get the dog to do it’s duty in one area, it’s possible but since it is not your dog it will probably be an uphill battle. The key is to first teach the dog to go on command (serious here) and once that is done to take him to the preferred area each time to do his business and use rewards until he gets the idea. Another thing you can try that you might have more control over is to move his shit each day to the preferred spot and see if he picks up on that. I had a similar poop problem with my dog eating his shit, the only way I fixed that was to pick up his shit constantly until he lost the urge. Good luck.

Fuck I thought this was a thread that was going to teach me how to pick up fresh dog shit without gaging and wanting to kill myself.

“First of all Karado, you are right. Shit does make good fertilizer. Fertilizer is good for grass, shit is not. These huge pancake-shaped pieces of shit prevent sunlight from getting to the grass.”

Who gives a fuck about the grass? I thought your concern was about the SHIT, what are you
gonna be concerned about next, The earthworms trying to surface after a rain?

“I like whining like a little girl, so I don’t know why you bother trying to harangue me for it. I guess you’ve never participated in the NFL thread.”

Isn’t that the thread where you requested where you can get a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader Outfit to wear?

“Why did I start this thread? To see if any T-Nationers out there have any solutions that might lessen my need to whine like a little girl. It wasn’t started to seek a way to avoid stepping in it.”

If you say so.

“There is no next time for the old hag. She’s eighty fucking five years old. And getting an iguana is about the worst readily-available pet she could get at her age.”

Not if she bequeaths it to you after she kicks the bucket.

“Those fucking things can get up to 6 feet in length and need their own well-heated room at that point. Sure, she could just keep it in a small terrarium and limit its growth, but what kind of companionship can a 5” iguana offer an 85 y/o woman?"

The kind of companionship that only a stoic cold-blooded reptilian can give, simple presence
minus the emotional connection.

Karado, you are a fucking idiot. Are you really HoustonGuy? Did you finally figure out how to last longer than two fucking weeks on this site? If so, congratulations.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]batman730 wrote:

[quote]print wrote:

The other option is to hire a company that picks it up. I know you’re on the West coast, but here in the East, it’s 7.00 once a week.[/quote]

I was going to suggest this. Totally worth it IMO.
[/quote]

Jesus, that’s really cheap. Who the fuck do they get to clean up shit for $7? At that rate it must be a completely degrading job.

Of course, who am I to talk? I’m doing it for free.[/quote]

I always imagined people providing this service must be people with some entrepreneurial spirit but no discernible skills. As far as I know they’re pretty much always owner operated type outfits.

I also thought that if they’re willing to do it at those rates they must need the 7 bucks worse than I do.

Either way, seems like a good deal.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
I learned this one in psychology so it is guaranteed to work, first time- and for the rest of the dogs life.

Next time he squats down to drop a deuce shoot him with that fifty cal. right in the face.

That will be the only place in the yard he will ever shit again.
[/quote]

What’s the best way to notch a tree so that when I cut it down it spirals away from the house, given that it is leaning slightly toward the house right now? I’ll be using a chainsaw and I really don’t want to send this fucking thing through my bedroom window.[/quote]

Notch (pie cut) one third of the way through so the mouth opens in the direction that you want it to fall. Go around to the opening of the notch and plunge cut through the trunk about an inch above where the notch closes, and sweep the bar of the chain about 30 degrees from each side of center. Go round back and begin to make the back cut on the same plane as the plunge. Remove the bar once you are about 1/3 of the way through and pound a felling wedge into the gap until the tree begins to lean in the direction you want it to fall. Reinsert the bar and continue the cut until the tree begins to move a little. When it does, pull the bar out whack the wedge a few more times for good measure and get the hell back and away!

To put a little english on it you can come through the back cut favoring the side you want it to twist around, then quickly switch back to the other and cut it further so that the first side you were cutting holds a little more than the second, causing the trunk to twist as the second side of the hinge releases first.

But you probably shouldn’t do that twisty thing. Without a really good feel for it and a good bit of practice, the potential for catastrophe is extremely high. With it, the potential is still really fucking high.

“Karado, you are a fucking idiot.”

That’s funny, all my former girlfriends say the same thing…Samantha? Is that you?

“Are you really HoustonGuy? Did you finally figure out how to last longer than two fucking weeks on this site? If so, congratulations”

Thank you! Who the fuck is 'HoustonGuy? 'Sounds like my kind of dude.

[quote]Karado wrote:
“Karado, you are a fucking idiot.”

That’s funny, all my former girlfriends say the same thing…Samantha? Is that you?

“Are you really HoustonGuy? Did you finally figure out how to last longer than two fucking weeks on this site? If so, congratulations”

Thank you! Who the fuck is 'HoustonGuy? 'Sounds like my kind of dude. [/quote]

Definitely HoustonGuy. Welcome back asshole.

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