Do Meatheads Dream of Iron Sheep?

This was my biggest challenge in combat sports. You can bypass a lot of technique with just sheer force, but eventually technique will win. It’s REALLY hard to not rely on the force you have and try to rely on technique that isn’t there yet. I found the best thing to do was intentionally put myself in bad positions that took away my strength advantages so I was forced to work technique. When grappling from the knees, instead of doing the stupid 5 minutes of trying to figure out how to take the other guy down and not actually doing any jits, I would just fall onto my back and work from guard, since I was AWFUL from there.

So far, have you applied any of this stuff to bouncing?

@biker No not yet. I’ve only had one shift since healing from my abductor tear, and it was a very relaxed night. I only had to cut one person off and that dumb drunk motherfucker tipped me $40, probably expecting to get another drink in. He didn’t, and I gladly kept his tip for services rendered.

@T3hPwnisher I’ve got over a decade of experience at being big, a few years experience at being strong, and only a few months of experience in combat sports. Making sure I learn technique has been a priority. I often ask my instructor if I’m doing good jiu jitsu or just being bigger and stronger. It gets a little fuzzy in an outcome-based sport like BJJ, but I’m starting to understand the differences for myself.

Last night’s takedowns are a perfect example. I’m not a takedown genius because I put a Judo instructor and a BJJ black belt on a mat the first time I attempted to do so. Those guys have done thousands of takedowns and I can count the number of times I’ve put someone on the ground like that on one hand. I’m just that much bigger and stronger than they are, with enough balance, coordination and timing to toss them over my hip.

The goal, of course, is for technique to join forces with being stronger than everyone else so I can choke the shit out of all of my new friends. That takes time, and I’m really enjoying the process. I’m bad at everything right now, which just means that getting better is within easy reach.

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Interesting.

I suppose some clarification is in order. I’m talking about choking the shit out of my recently-made friends from BJJ, plus a few girls I know who are really into that sort of stuff.

I need to get a LOT better at jiu jitsu before I start choking out ALL of the new friends I meet.

Friday 6/16/17

Deadlift

135x5
225x5
315x3
405x1
455x1
495x1
545x1

Stiff-arm lat PD

3 sets of 10

Facepulls

3 sets of 15

Notes: Kept it brief and easy. I felt my abductor again on 545 so I didn’t push further. I’m also getting a massage tonight so I didn’t want to do any high-volume stuff. Inflamed tissue and a strong sturdy gal working me over don’t go well together in my experience.

Happy weekend everyone!

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Monday 6/19/17

BJJ 90 Min

Today we continued June’s training block of back mount attacks and escapes. We worked on getting half mount or mount after making the escape, then sinking a choke. We finished up class with a bow and arrow choke escape.

Rolling began with the Sr. Purple belt. I got arm-bar’d pretty fast. Finished the round strong, took (maybe given) mount, got rolled, then our instructor coached me into tapping him with a cross-collar choke from guard. Very goon. Not so technique.

Next round was the senior blue belt. We started from standing. He seemed pretty skilled with his footwork, but I sort of swept his foot out when he had the other in the air. I timed it well, and also did an excellent job of weighing 80 pounds more than him. I followed him down right into half guard. I mostly kept him there, couldn’t really get any attacks going, but I tried something crafty and paid for it by ending up in his half guard. I lasted until the bell, but he was close to sinking a baseball bat choke on me, which he finished about 15 seconds after it rang.

Third roll was with a 15 year old white belt. I let him use me as a practice dummy mostly. I also hip thrust + benched pressed his 140 lb ass right into the air when he took mount. Fun times on the mat.

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Tuesday 6/20/17

SSB Squats

155x5
245x5
295x3
335x3
385x3
425x1

Stiff-arm lat PD’s

3 sets of 10

Bench Press

105x5
145x5
195x5
235x3

DB Bench Press

55x10

Tricep Extensions

3 sets of 12

Facepulls

3 sets of 15

Kettlebell Swings - 88 pounder

5
10
15
20

Notes: My shoulder is still stiff, mildly sore and not particularly strong. No sharp pain while pressing, but nothing felt right at all so I didn’t push much at all.

Its a good 10 degrees warmer inside the gym than it is outside. Sweat box squats today.

Thursday 6/22/17

BJJ 90 min

Today we worked on a variation of the back mount work - attacks and escapes from turtle. I didn’t note any of the terminology but the idea is to hook them and roll them. Class was small and I was paired with a 150lb purple belt. All the technique in the world couldn’t help him overcome physics, so I had to help him get a little momentum to train the drills.

Rolling was fun yet again. My first two rolls were with the 150lb purple belt. Neither of us tapped the other in 10 min of sparring, which speaks mostly to physics. My skill is lacking enough that he was able to easily get his legs around my neck, but I’m broad enough in the torso that he wasn’t able to sink the triangle choke. I even complied for a bit just to see if he could do it. Nope. I did make it fun by picking him up and moving us to the center of the mat while he was working the triangle, setting us both down gently.

Third roll was with the black belt. Start from standing and once again I put him on the mat with relative ease thanks to years of lifting, eating and sleeping. I got him into side control but he did some jiu jitsu shit and I ended up tapping from his choke about 2 minutes later. I survived the rest of the round.

Fourth round was more of a flow roll with him, and we ended up talking for about the last half.

Then I bounced until 1:30 in the morning. It was a fun shift but I’m walking dead right now.

Lol.

Good stuff. Have been day dreaming about some sort of martial arts training lately. Glad I stopped in.

@The_Myth LOL is right. I am starting to have a good idea of what these people are trying to do to me, but every once in a while I just find the blood supply to my brain being cut off with no understanding of how I got to this point in life. Jiu Jitsu shit.

@sen_say Hey thanks for stopping in. Now that I’m two months into BJJ, I feel comfortable recommending it to just about any healthy, normal person who is interested in it. It is a high-effort activity that’s easy on the joints AND you get to meet new friends and choke the shit out of each other.

As long as you can deal with being constantly bruised, the mat burn, mild to moderate damage to your trachea (should have just tapped), getting sweat showers from people you barely know, having strangers violate you in all sorts of demeaning ways, and the general discomfort of training, well, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu might just be for you!

You really have a way with words.

@biker Thanks! Maybe someday I’ll go pro and start making the big bucks blogging about BJJ, lifting, bouncing and cracking distasteful jokes.

Friday 6/23/17

Deadlift

135x5
225x5
315x3
405x3
495x1
545x1
585x1

Stiff-arm lat PD’s

3 sets of 10

Tricep pushdowns

3 sets of 12

Facepulls

3 sets of 15

Bicep Curls

3 sets of 12

Kettlebellery - 88 pounder

10 goblet squats
10 swings
10 goblet squats
10 swings
1 goblet squat

Notes: Shut down the kettlebellery because my abductor told me to. I’m fine, just playing it safe. 585 felt good. A bit heavier than I remember it being, but it has been a while since I’ve held on to that much weight.

Happy weekend everyone!

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Monday 6/26/17

BJJ - 90 min

Today we worked through most of June’s back control.

Escapes: Double over, double under, over under

Attacks: Rear naked choke, Ezekiel choke, sliding collar choke, mirror choke, bow and arrow choke, sneaky lapel choke, face push arm bar.

I only had time for two rolls today, but they went well. First up was the senior purple belt. He tormented me in his guard for a while before I managed to smash pass him and get in side control. From here I took mount and held it for a while. I switched to Russian mount when he rolled on his side, then got him in an armbar he definitely did not expect from me. It took a lot of work to break his grip.

Second roll was with the senior blue belt. We began standing and I got the takedown, but he rolled me right as we hit the ground and got me in side control. From here he tried to get a figure 4 armlock on me but I managed to defend it. I couldn’t make the escape and he eventually got me in an armbar where he hugged my far side arm up against his body while he pushed his knee into my belly. I’m not sure what it is called but he showed me how to do it.

Tuesday 6/27/17

SSB Squats

155x5
245x5
Then on to…

335x1 EMOM 20 reps

Stiff-arm lat PD’s

10 sets of 3

Pull-ups

BWx3 EMOM 30 reps

Band pull-aparts

3 sets of many

Tricep pushdowns

3 sets of 10

Kettlebell swings - 88 pounder

5
10
15
20

50 min

Notes: Good way to work up a sweat. All systems go.

Edit: Except for my shoulder, that’s still fucky.

Thursday 6/29/17

BJJ 105 min

Today we wrapped up Junes’ back control by drilling more escapes. I made every class this month and I feel like I absorbed the subject matter well. We drilled the escapes some more and then moved on to some attacks, but Thursday’s class was all about rolling.

I took on the black belt first and managed to thwart his attacks. I don’t know if he was going easy on me or what, but he said I defended everything well. I definitely didn’t get anything going on him at all.

Next up was the Sr. Blue belt who got me in a bad spot and toyed with me for most of the 5 min, but helped me work my side control escapes, which I don’t know very well yet. He tapped me somehow, I forget.

Next I got to taste fresh meat for the first time. I rolled with a new white belt, a young athletic guy of about 22 years and maybe 190 pounds. I tapped him with an americana arm lock in about 5 seconds. Then I did it to him again. Then I toyed with him before tapping him a third time. This jiu jitsu stuff really works, especially when it joins forces with being big and strong.

Next up was Sr. Purple belt. He got his revenge on me from Monday, tapping me twice in about 2 min. Armbar and a choke. Rest of round was a draw.

Sr. Purple belt again. I got him in an armbar from Russian Mount again, this time using some trickery to pull it off. Rest of round was a draw.

150 pound purple belt next. 5 min draw with a lot of new bruises from that bony little fucker. He’s very mobile and skilled.

I’m definitely in much better BJJ shape. I could have kept rolling but my right groin was getting pretty sore, so I decided to call it. Mauling new white belts is SO MUCH FUN!

Friday 6/30/17

BJJ 60 minutes

Open mat Fridays is a new thing at my gym, so I went. It was just me, my instructor and a few kids today, so we all rolled.

I got whooped by my instructor, and he kept choking me with my own arm. We also worked takedowns, and he’s managed to solve my goon moves and he got the better of me each time today. Lots of lessons, lots of taps.

I just let the kids climb all over me and work on breaking my grip for armbars, escaping my side control and passing my guard. Fun stuff. Little killers. So cute.

Thursday 7/6/17

BJJ 90 min

Today we began the July training block, which will focus on work from guard. We drilled three basic attacks from the closed guard position.

Cross collar choke
Armbar
Triangle

Rolling began with the blue belt who I was rolling with when my abductor tore. I’ve learned a few things since then, and I was able to put a few new concepts into practice. We started from the knees and he pulled guard on me, which I tried to pass but in the process he somehow managed to take my back. I eagerly applied my over/under back control escape, which he made pretty difficult for me. I put a lot of weight on him and made him miserable, that’s for sure. Instead of escaping I somehow gave him mount, and he just kind of held my arm down while I pulled his collar to keep him from posturing and trapped his other arm. Eventually he moved his free arm off of mine and I took the opportunity to roll him. I worked the smash pass to clear his guard and took side control. I tried an americana and he defended it well. I took Russian mount and started clawing for an armbar, but he knew what I was doing and I couldn’t get a good grip. He rolled and I took his back for a few seconds before the bell. 5 min draw.

I think next time I should just grab and fall when I feel the armbar, but what the hell do I know. I’ll try it if given the chance, unless I learn something better before then. This was the best roll I’ve ever had. Instead of drowning I was doggie paddling. It is such a great feeling to put these things together under stress.

Second roll was with my black belt instructor. I won this take down game and got him in side control going down to the mat. He escaped my side control easily, which seems to give everyone else a lot of problems. From there he more or less dominated the positioning and attempted to choke me in a variety of ways, in addition to a few different figure 4 arm locks. I escaped them all, using probably equal parts brute force and equal parts technique. Actually probably mostly brute force. 5 min draw.

Third roll was with my black belt instructor again. We spent 3.5 minutes on our feet, trying to take each other down and choke each other out on our feet. He eventually succeeded in taking me down and taking my back. He tried to choke me with my own gi and I defended it. I saw the clock and turtled for the last 15 seconds, which I now deeply regret. I should have kept fighting. 5 min draw.

That’s all I had time for. I could have kept going. I’m definitely in better BJJ shape, and I didn’t get tapped today.

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Friday 7/7/17

BJJ 90 min - Open mat Friday

No drills, just a LOT of rolling. I think I did 10 or 12 five minute rounds. Exhausting

Highlights include tapping a fellow white belt who is also a Judo instructor. Got him in a guillotine choke. I tapped the small purple belt with an Americana. I also tapped a girl with an Americana. Hooray for me.

Otherwise I mostly got mauled. We had a four-stripe brown belt from the top MMA school in the state on the mats. He’s also a competitive Oly weightlifter. He completely destroyed me. Repeatedly. I am still in awe at what he was able to do to me. Total domination, taking everything I had away and tapping me in seconds. He’s exactly what I want to be someday, a savage combination of strength and skill.

He also showed me some great stuff for mount escapes that really take advantage of my strength. He invited me to train at his garage gym across town on Sunday, which I will most likely take him up on.

I’m sinking deeper into this cult.

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