T Nation

Do It For Yourself

How many fat people do you know that have started to diet, then very quickly given up? It seems that even if they are making progress, they dump the diet and fitness efforts and revert back to their slackass ways. What on earth is going on with these people?

Hey, I’m sure it is a pretty complicated topic area, but one thing that I’ve noticed is that people are trying to get into shape for the wrong reasons. They pick motivations that are transient. For example, if I get in shape I bet Cindy Lou will definately want to boink me! Okay, great, sounds like a plan. Too bad you see Cindy Lou with her tongue in someone elses mouth the next day. Too bad the guy is built like a linebacker and he has his hands down her pants.

Slice of pizza, or a dozen, anyone?

I’m sure the title is a bit of a clue, but I think you need to be motivated for yourself. The goals can be specific, but they need to be things that aren’t transient. I think it helps if the person starting the new lifestyle is saying things like:

I want to be in shape for me.

I want to achieve some goal, be healthy, live longer, look good, take pride in my appearance, deserve a chick who’s nickname is not Bessie, wake up after getting laid and not find a cow bell or dog collar on the floor.

If the thing your brain has focused on as the reason you are enduring all the pain and suffering of a new fitness and diet regimen suddenly goes away, how the hell can you resist reverting to your crappy habits? If you are like most mortals, you can’t! Why set yourself up for failure like this?

As a FFB (Former Fat Boy) this concept has certainly worked pretty well for me. Several years back, unemployed because the startup I was in tanked, completely out of shape, recently single from a serious relationship, I was getting a bit unhappy with things. I knew I wanted to do something about it, but I wasn’t motivated yet.

I actually did exactly nothing about it for a month or two, eating like a pig, watching television, wallowing in self-pity and so on. All the while I was slowly getting more and more disgusted with myself. I knew that I’d never get my ex back, there was no point using that as a reason to get in shape. No, it wasn’t until I was totally fed up with myself, that I decided that I wanted to return to the person I once was, that I was able to get started.

Yes, that’s about the time I came across what was then called T-Mag, and started to read up on nutrition and training advice. I wasn’t ready for the training at that point, but I started to change my habits and found myself progressing. I was setting goals I wanted to achieve, simply because I wanted to achieve them. No matter what crap came and went in my life, and there was plenty of it, my desire for those goals was still there.

If something tempts you, you need to have the strength to resist it. Ask yourself, what do you want? Then ask yourself, how bad do you want it? You’ll know very quickly whether or not you want it bad enough to actually achieve it. Do you want it bad enough to walk past the foods you are used to eating? Do you want it bad enough to get your ass outside or down to the gym when you are sore and tired? Do you want it bad enough to keep working day after day, month after month, year after year, until you get it?

If you have goals that aren’t transitory, if you are doing it for yourself and not for someone or something else, then if you want it bad enough, it is simply a matter of time. Don’t worry about how long it takes. You’ll eventually be the person that other people look at with envy, wondering how come you are so lucky. You’ll know it isn’t luck, but years of determination, discipline and desire.

Set your goals wisely and make sure you are doing it for yourself. I’m nowhere near where I want to be, but I’m chasing my own goals, in my own time, and have made great progress. So can you, if you know what you want and if you want it bad enough to make it happen.

Are you fat and out of shape? Although you can probably get there faster than I did, here’s my transformation in progress and a lot of the information that helped me out…

Checkpoint / Advice
http://www.t-nation.com/readTopic.do?id=632072

Are You A Beginner?
http://www.t-nation.com/readTopic.do?id=550116

Please excuse the shameless plugging of my own threads and good luck!

great post.

keep 'er bumped.

Are you accepting donations for your quest in self discovery? Where do I mail my dollar?

Bashing aside, I’m proud of you for putting your story up and admitting how low you’d sunk before you started your climb back up. I think you’re making great progress and I look forward to seeing more from you.

That kind of motivation works for other stuff too.

The problem I’ve seen people run into is the conundrum of self. That is - Am I being self centered or selfish? The solution is in the motive. Being self centered is protecting yourself and the values that you live by. Doing better for yourself so that you can be a better person all around becomes a good thing.You know better, do better and feel better. Everyone around you benefits.

Selfish though, thats the opposite. In the long run, no one benefits. A sure sign of selfish is not wanting to share what you have with someone who needs it. How much fun is that? Having a great wealth of something and not being able to enjoy it with others.

Gotta hand it to you Vroom. You have done a good job of doing right by your self without becoming selfish.The compilations of threads you have created are a testimonial to that.

Great post vroom and I am in total agreement.

You cant change yourself or others unless the individual wants it. I was a FB for years until one day i decided to become an FFB and it was no problem after the decision was made.

The mind is a powerful tool.

Great Post,
Phill

Thanks for the post.
It’s a simple philosophy but one that makes sense and one worth embracing.

[quote]vroom wrote:
Set your goals wisely and make sure you are doing it for yourself. I’m nowhere near where I want to be, but I’m chasing my own goals, in my own time, and have made great progress. So can you, if you know what you want and if you want it bad enough to make it happen.
[/quote]

vroom, this is so true! Setting goals is so important, and making sure you’re doing it for yourself.

I wonder how many of us are really where we want to be, or are we all setting and chasing new goals.

For me, I think I’ll always be setting the bar a little higher and trying to reach it. Sounds like you will be doing the same thing.

Good luck on reaching those goals!