Seems simple enough. Your food choices dont look great, but it looks like you already know that. Time to bite the bullet and make them better. You dont need to drop everything at once and start eating kale salads for every meal, but make small improvements over time that stick.
Slowly convert breakfast away from that and transition to something a little more... substantial. I like the eggs/breakfast meat approach. Even a slice or two of some nice, hearty toast would do fine if you are very active like you say. Your basically having carbs with a side of carbs right now. As Rampant said, oatmeal and greek yogurt would be a good idea here too.
Lunch seems fine enough depending on the amounts.
Dinner: Maybe tell the wife your goals and have her incorporate a little something better suited to them? Dont have her change the entire menu if that would frustrate her, but maybe just include a little something for you. I'm not sure what "usually quite carby" means but that to me says you are trying to tell us it could be "better."
9pm snack... that is Basically candy, as you said you know its bad. Figure out a way to make it better. Maybe cottage cheese with peanut butter/fruit? Maybe a few pieces of string cheese? Or just skip it all together if you can muster the willpower.
Good luck with the parenting, I just had my own and know what you are going through.