T Nation

Depression Cutting Eating Habits


#1

Hey everyone,
It seems weird in a way that I'm so comfortable sharing this with everyone here, but i truely need help. I have been diagnosed with depression which has become clinical. I have had occasional thoughts of suicide as well. Its killing me. I am constantly inside my own head, dwelling on all the bullshit in my life. Just this weekend my girlfriend of 3 years says she doesnt want to be with me and shit... Its really fucking with me.

With that being said, I can not eat at all. I struggle to fall asleep. And when i get into the gym, the one place that makes me feel like a million dollars, I crack, start panting randomly, then become mentally and physically weak to the point that i end up leaving the gym.

What do I do? I am on an anti-depressant, was working great for the first 2 weeks. I also am going to talk to someone as well. I'm being proactive about this, but there must be other people on here that feel the same way i do right now.

What does anyone else use to fuel their workout when they feel like falling off the face of the earth?

Thanks,
Ben


#2

IMO ben, run a hormonal panel and start possibly seeing a shrink. You have to figure out whats going on in your head. I understand chemical depression (uncontrolable based on chems in the brain and their reactions) and thats my reason behind a hormonal panel (in theory). whats your weight? body type? sex drive? sexual function? muscle tone? etc etc. Look up low testosterone but dont over analyze, in fact write down all of your symptoms now, everything you feel is wrong, then do research but dont self diagnose, just take into consideration. Anti's mask problems and can fuel them. low cal intake can also fuel depression try even shakes, you should be able to sip something if you are depressed. I have my own experience and everyones a snow flake. Cant just say "Im depressed," there is a starting point, a trigger, you need to find it.


#3

I'm not saying I have deppression nearly as bad as what you are going through, but I have moments once in a while where I am very depressed (they havn't happened much recently. When this happens I find it very difficult to eat and end up sitting around feeling sorry for myself.

Until the last time this happened I never really sought a solution, but last week I was annoyed that this has kept happening and I knew not eating was going to fuck up my workout. So I blasted some really loud music, beat the shit out of a towl and my bed, and then just bellowed as loud as I could for a long time. After this I tried to ignore my problems at hand, it worked pretty good for me. Something you could try if you want, the war cry felt really good. :confused:


#4

Thanks guys. I got my buddy, who wants to be a personal trainer, on my side big time right now. He went through shit and its a long ass story, but hes like my coach now. I am going to see someone hopefully next week. I finally realized i hate my ex because of how bad she fucked with my head. I'm done with her ass. I'm starting to do a vigorous workout routine and i am eating again. i had 6 eggs 3 pieces of toast with 6 tbsp of PB and an apple OJ. Thats the most I've eaten in a long time.

I'm over her ass and only moving on from here. Thanks guys, you truly helped me a shitload!

Thanks guys,
Ben


#5

All I can suggest is to be proactive about your own health, as you mentioned you're doing already. Thats the most important thing.

I can't help you with your eating problem. Maybe turn to shakes? I have the opposite problem, I developed binge eating patterns over the years, which actually helped me later on when I turned to weight lifting. I never had a problem eating a certain amount of food after that.


#6

Working out and eating healthy will get you back in the swing of things big time. Just sticking with it is the "hard" part. I put hard in parentheses not for any subtle homo effect, but to play down the actual level of difficulty in sticking to a plan. You just can't be lazy. That's what it all boils down to, and I think we've all been caught falling prey to slacking off here and there is some point in our lives, so do your best to constantly focus on planning your next workout and meals. It does take time and commitment, and how hard is that really, as opposed to feeling full of sadness and hate over some relationship you had with a bitch that's not even worth it. Wait my own personal problems came up there. Sorry about that. I'm re-focused now. Just stick to a plan. Any plan. That's all it takes.


#7

Thanks everyone for all the love and support.

Ben


#8

I went through this exact thing last summer, with the nice addition of throwing up for two weeks, all grief related.

Partially, you just have to accept it. Don't try to escape, just realize that it's going to be a short period of time in the total span of your life and if you feel like shit, you feel like shit. Don't bother with a bunch of "feel better" techniques. Just be in the moment and then the moment will pass, instead of avoiding it and dealing with it later.

On the eating side of things, if this happens again do go with the shakes. You can pack 1000s of calories in a couple of them and at least that way you wont loose to much. For my case, that didn't work because of the getting sick thing, so I just ate steak and burritos for about a month because they were the only thing that tasted good enough to eat, yet would also stay down.

Also, if you can (have been able to keep some food down), do cardio. Because it's very repetitive for a long amount of time, it forces your brain to turn off somewhat and several studies have shown that it has more lasting effects on eliminating depression than medication.


#9

I hear you man depressions a bitch.

all that really helps is hanging in there and after a while it goes. Just keeping busy helps try and find things to keep you occupied.


#10

Agreeing with the cardio part here, i absolutely HATE cardio, but when you are feeling down there is no better option.


#11

Thanks everyone,
I have gotten better since the first post. I have a new medication, which is helping a ton. I also have been inspired by my buddy, and he has helped me a ton. Shit got better with my girlfriend of 3 years so that is always a plus also. I feel like things are looking up. Ill keep u all updated as everything goes on

Thanks everyone,
Ben


#12

I know my depression was at least part having a shit diet and being super-fat so I guess take my advice with a grain of salt or 3.

1 - See a professional, it's worth it.
2 - Eat fish. Lots of fish. Or Omega-3 eggs or fish oil supplements. It helped me A LOT.
3 - (echo) Cardio is your best friend when you are down. Upbeat music, 30 minutes just not thinking but sweating your balls off. It helps...I did 30 minutes of good 155BPM cardio 7 days a week when I was at my lowest. Really did make the day go smoother. Do it every morning.