I will try and make this story as short as possible as it could potentially get long!
I was caught up in a difficult situation that left me in two minds about the best action for me to take, this hesitation left me in a potentially dangerous position, I will explain…
I was coming back from a meal out and walking back to the car with my heavily pregnant wife, upon entering the car park in the stair way I see a woman cowering in the corner and a man standing over her shouting abuse. He had a pint glass in his hand and was making threats to hit her with it, it looked like he had already probably been physical towards her.
I got between them both and managed to usher him back to a reasonable distance from her whilst trying to talk him down. My wife went to comfort the woman. He would calm down, apologise to me and my wife and say he just wanted to talk to her, then he would flip out and try to get close to her and I had to stand my ground and keep him at a distance. His aggression at this point was not directed at me although I could tell me standing my ground was irritating him. This cycle went on for around 10 minutes, calm then aggressive, there was absolutely no one else around and I was unsure of my next move. The aggression started to turn towards me… This is where I had the dilemma.
My only concern was my wife and unborn child, this made me try and keep the situation calm and not escalate it, although all I wanted to do was attack. I felt I had the upper hand being sober and he seemed pretty drunk.
In my head it was like this…
attack attack attack
But what if you can’t take him? And I get hurt leaving my wife alone. Don’t attack.
But your gonna be on the back foot and your defence sucks, would be better to attack and get upper hand.
But what if my pregnant wife intervenes and get knocked over, I know she will try. Don’t risk it.
So I kind of froze not knowing what was best, he pushed my chest, I tripped over a small curb and banged my head on some steps and he stood over me with the glass pulled back threatening to hit me. He then went to go towards the woman and my wife, I scrambled up and again got back in between them, putting a hand on his chest to hold him back. His mood was so erratic, he apologised but continued to try and get to his wife.
After a minute or so the police arrived, he tried to assault a police officer and was arrested. Apparently 2 hotel reception staff had witnessed the domestic and called them, he had grabbed her by the face and forced her to the floor. (Pretty annoyed they didn’t come help but what can you do)
I received a phone call from the police, explaining the woman refused to talk to them but would like to thank me. I was fuming!
Tldr. In trying to not escalate the situation and end up hurt and unable to protect my heavily pregnant wife, I ended up nearly getting hurt and being unable to protect my heavily pregnant wife.
Although this was 6 months ago it still plays on my mind and I still don’t know what the right thing to do was.
Does anyone have any tips on this kind of thing? Any videos of self defence techniques that would help?
How would you have handled it?
Does your response to situations change depending on who is in your company?
Any other advice that may help?
Thanks and sorry about the long post.