Dealing with Assholes

I’m tired of not being able to deal with assholes. I’m not just talking about assholes I come across myself - that I can handle to a certain degree. The problem comes in when someone is an ASSHOLE to my girlfriend. I can’t stand this. I want to beat the shit out of these losers. JUST ONE PROBLEM! The law protects them. This was noticed by TC in an Atomic Dog some time ago. So… what do you all think? Whats the best way of giving the assholes of the world some retribution? Is it even possible in todays soceity?

Simple be an asshole to him or at least get in face and let him know you don’t appreciate that shit, if all else fails walk away and let it go. What issue was that atomic dog in?

GOOD topic! First, you’re right, most assholes exist because they’ve figured out how to act in a way wherein they still receive the protection of the law. There really only is one cure, other than moving to Texas where you can still smack a guy who bad-mouths your girlfriend without going to jail or losing everything you own in a lawsuit –

Learn how to be COMPLETELY cool, and fully reactive. What I mean by that is learn how to not react to assholes in an emotional factor, so you can become the individual who is capable of forcing the asshole into either giving up, or goading him/her/it into making the first physical move, after which point your capacity for physical reaction is much improved, legally. It's like the old cowboy movies...remember how in the final duels, the two gunslingers would look at each other for a long time, circling each other, and NEITHER would try to be the first to 'draw.' Though this has become a filmic cliche, there is a logical reason behind this -- the man who drew first, shot, and killed, would be arrested, tried, and quite probably hung for murder. Patience was the rule, and it remains so today.

Assholes win by using the law, and human emotion, to manipulate other people in the crudest and cruelest ways. Once you learn how to detach yourself from the immediate embarassment, anger, or humiliation in the hands of your typical, clever but not very intelligent asshole, you can use any situation to your advantage and the asshole's detriment. And to hell with any pathetic individual who suggests that you 'ignore' them. Ignoring a problem will not make it go away. Just practice, and make sure you are in control of your own reactions and emotions -- do not give in to the manipulations of others and you'll find it quite easy to handle any form of asshole.

What would you define as being in asswhole? From what I noticed everyone is an asswhole in varying degrees. I find people that drive slower than me on the left lane as asswholes. I fine those who leave hugh gaps in bumper to bumper traffic asswholes. I fine cocky people asswholes. I find myself an asswhole at times! So you can’t do really anything about it. Think about it, there are to many of them and not enough bullets! Whats the point. Just don’t let the little things crawl under your skin, its not worth the bother. People like to see other people get irritated. Don’t let them do that to you. I am saying this thinking that they are not really being total jerks. There are varying degrees of asswholes. If its a really sever thing, I understand getting in their face. But if its just that person, he was born and asswhole and walks around with a stick up his butt. Just shrug it off and have a beer. F him or her.

He has the right to be an asshole. The government can’t punish someone for unmeasurable harm like being an asshole, but it is their job to prevent people from harming others, or at least punish those that don’t.

Just play it cool n wait till you see that pussy when no one is around that knows you.

Y’know, this reminds me of something my Ukrainian girlfriend regularly says – ‘You Americans, you are so bored…your life is so easy that you find so things to get angry about that matter nothing. Angry about road, angry about lines, angry about people that dress strange. So silly, you people need hobby. Try not having money to buy food, then you will be less bored.’

Of course, in typing, I can't get down that damned sexy slavic accent...

If you have a drink handy, pretend to trip and throw it in his face. Apologize profusely but be obviously sarcastic, then if he throws the first punch you get a KICK HIS ASS FOR FREE license. Another thing that can usually allways goad an asshole that insults women into a fight is to say -Shut up you faggot woman hater- (no offense to gays sorry, it just works so well!) Unless he is gay then I don’t know just do like elegua said and stay cool and think of the wittiest insults possible to get the dude to attack you. You just pull a reversal on him. Make it so he is the one that has to decide between backing down or being criminally liable. It’s totally immature but a man can only take so much BS in one sitting before he has to give some back.

I believe I have been enlightened by every single one of your posts. I finally had to let you know. Thank you. Enuff ass kissing, I second your post.

It’s better to be an asshole than a whole ass!

Holy crap…minilifter, I want to tell you something – for the past week…actually longer than that, though the past week has been most dramatic…I have been going through, what some would call, a ‘dark night of the soul.’ What I mean is, most of my life, since I was around 12, I have wanted to be a writer. A few things I’ve written have been published here and there, both in academic journals and in popular publications, but not enough to make a consistent living. For the past week, I’ve strongly considered giving up on the whole mess and getting some job as a computer programmer, network specialist, or some crap like that – something that would allow me to survive, but would in no way be what I wanted out of life. Your post has re-strengthened my resolve to become a writer – in a way stronger than anything I’ve felt in perhaps five years or more. We will probably never meet face to face in person, but please accept my sincere thanks, as one human being on this strange planet to another – because you’ve renewed my energy to accomplish my personal goals more than anyone’s done since I graduated from university. I will probably never be able to properly thank you, but if it means anything, stay strong and stick to your dreams and goals, no matter who or what blocks your path. As far as any human knows, we have only one life…make the best of it. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for reaffirming what I had almost lost…the hope and joy of a real life.

Thanks for all the replies! Yeah… I think dealing with an asshole isn’t that hard… EXCEPT when your daily dealings are tied to the asshole. For example, boss, stepfather of gf, ya know. That makes it real difficult.

the character steve martin played in roxanne delt with the asshole in the bar REALLY well.