To be honest, there ARE no replacements for deadlifts. what the fuck, someone asks you to help'em move a couch or you're building a rock wall or whatever, and you've got to deadlift. It's one of the most natural movements humans have.
There's something else going on with you. I would get this checked out by a doctor if I was you, it sounds like there's something more there. Online diagnoses are worthless.