T Nation

Dating younger women -- not just for a cheap fling

Shamus: I think the FIRST thing to do if you have an interest in a younger woman is to do an honest self-assessment. A lotta guys “gotta’thing” for younger chicks; I “gotta thing” for someone who brings me joy and stimulates me to be a better person (love???)


If she does that for you, and you’re not just looking for an ego boost, then simply let her know that you are there for her when she’s ready. Send a little simple gift or card (but VERY infrequently; don’t turn into some weird “cyberspace/snail mail stalker” and let her work through her feelings in her own time.


Oh…never EVER treat a younger woman (or ANY woman for that matter!) like shes some dumbass, no-nothing spaz. Treat her like a woman who is an important part of your life…

Yeah, I am in a bad situation. The girl has been getting a lot of heat and has a lot of stuff to deal with before she moves away to college (5 months from now). She’s been told that its illegal to even date (no sex involved) someone older than 20 which is pure BS (First Amendment – right of people to assemble peacefully) and I’m sure she’s been made to feel guilty that she likes me, went out with me, etc.

I sent her an email to set the record straight about the law, but I’m sure all this heat she’s getting is influencing her thinking.

But to answer your question, she does bring me joy and make me want to be a better man. I am SO much better for having known her. I used to make bring her joy too, and it kills me to think that she is suffering because she met me.

We haven’t talked in a long time, but I keep telling myself that I won her over once, I can do it again as soon as she is in a better situation. Its going to be a long 5 months. And I know many will say its not worth it. But it is to me.