Crap You Learned In School

(Edited to correct my horrific memory lapse and mischaracterization of Mr. Simon’s words… Thanks Lifticus!)

Every once in a while, I remember something I “learned” in school which I have later found out to be completely incorrect. Sometimes in embarrassing situations in which I assert a “fact” only to find out that it was flat out wrong.

So what are some “facts” you learned in school that were totally wrong? I’ll start off:

-“Loose” is the British way of spelling “lose.”

-Senators, once elected, receive their full salaries for life, even if they only serve one term.

The stupid taste bud, tongue map. You know – you taste sweet in the front, bitter in the back. Total lie!

Just say no.

High school tried to teach me that to be successful you have to take everything a text book says to be the absolute truth and you absolutely must conform to the status quo. I quickly learned that this is a total lie.

Doing everything by the book is impractical and Old Fashion people are fucking hypocrites.

That electrons orbit the neutron.

that abstinence is the only form of contraception. I went to a catholic school, in northern Ireland.
I was also taught to not question authority too much.

Thanksgiving is about Pilgrims and Indians.

The U.S. is a democracy.

Eating from the Food Guide Pyramid will make you healthy.

Science is black and white and full of infallible truths.

All P.E. teachers are burnouts that are compensating for some HUGE shortcoming.

High level math is necessary for EVERYONE to function in life.

That what is possible is less important than what is probable.

That worthy careers are only found behind a desk.

College is the best path to take for a great working career.

High school prepares you for college and college prepares you for “the real world.”

Being popular will lead to a bright future.

Counselors are a poor-man’s physchiatrist.

The war on drugs is valid, valiant and will end in victory. And D.A.R.E. ‘graduates’ will be drug free for life.

Your resume is the most important factor in acquiring a job.

A restless kid that wants to stand, walk around and learn from multiple methods has A.D.H.D. and should take Ritalin.

The environment could not continue without human intervention.

All questions have answers.

Standardized tests reveal intelligence.

Experts are only those with credentials acquired through traditional education.

The media(all forms) is a reliable news source.

All teachers are worth learning from.

I haven’t thought about this at all :wink:

That adults know what the hell they’re talking about.

That “cup-stacking” is a sport. (and therefore is taught in gym class in lieu of actual physical activity.)

I actually learnt lots of useful stuff.

I went to really bad schoold in a deprived area. Here are some experiences.

  1. Hymns (I went to a Christian school)

  2. Whats the point of algebra or trigonmetry. While these subjects are important in some vocations, 99 percent of people never use it.

  3. Nobody gave a shit about detention. It wasn’t what scared us. The most scariest thing for me would have been to be seperated from my friends in different classes.

  4. College in the UK was a joke. If I look back at it. All I thought about was getting as off my head as possible. I actually did exams whilst drunk as a mofo. This was a chemisty exam and I dropped beakers all over the place. Then I went to the teacher/examine and explained how I was ill and left the exam.

  5. Kids are too protected. I had a friend who used to shave his legs and write the answers on his thighs. Then he would either wear shorts or go to the toilet to check the answers. He actually got caught once and the teachers decided he was under too much stress and gave him a week off. He wasn’t disciplined for it.

In fact pupils regularly punched teachers with no consequence.

  1. i got with a couple of ugly girls. I still have some of the same friends and they have never let me live it down.

  2. I once stole tickets for an evening play and got caught. Moral of the story? Don’t take tickets that have numbers at the bottom.

  3. For detention once, I had to handwrite Gensis onto paper.

I have so much more but can’t think of them now.

[quote]swissrugby67 wrote:
That electrons orbit the neutron.


As in the BOHR MODEL?

So the wave model and quantum theory is the accepted idea now?

[quote]spurlock wrote:

Being popular will lead to a bright future.

Your resume is the most important factor in acquiring a job.

All teachers are worth learning from.


Stands up and applauds

Hits home. Very, very right.

Columbus discovered America. Not the tribes from Asia thousands of years before him.

[quote]BigRagoo wrote:
swissrugby67 wrote:
That electrons orbit the neutron.

As in the BOHR MODEL?

So the wave model and quantum theory is the accepted idea now?[/quote]

Well not quite the Bohr model but mainly the conception that electrons actually “orbit”. ie the attached pic.

The wave model is the more wildly accepted now yes, at least thats what they have me teaching the current high school kids.

The quantum theory doesnt kick in till Uni.

The worst is the chemistry syllabus. I think they still do electron configurations 2 8 8 … lol

I hate the brain washing of political correctenss and the overhyped idea of “melting pot” that’s being propagated from first grade to highschool and beyond…but that’s just me.

That pluto is a planet!

You’ll use Algebra and Geometry well after high school, even if you don’t pursue a career in math or one that’s math related.

The kids below me at my school figured out that their teacher was making powerpoints based off Wikipedia entries so the day before the teacher was going to give a lesson on the Greek Empire they added in a bullshit section to an article about a zombie folklore myth. It appeared in the powerpoint the next day and the 3 kids who masterminded it burst out in uncontrollable laughter.

I remember in highschool basketball the coach would tell us not to drink too much water. If we did we would get cramps! lol What a crock of shit!