T Nation

Confess to Jesus


#1

Since we now have our own Jesus, it would be nice to have a place to confess our sins.

Jesus, I am in general a pretty chill guy, but there are times I just want to nuke entire cities or countries... I know I won't do it, because I don't have acess to that kind of weapons, but that is all that's stopping me. The will is definetely there. Can you help me?


#2

Jesus, I kick puppies. Can you help?


#3

False prophet.

Around here, you'd be better off confessing to Ct. Rockula.


#4


#5

Dear Jeebus, I've been waiting a very long time for Alexis Texas to do Interracial porn. Can you help a brother out?


#6

Hey Pootie I thought you wanted to get off the white women, you addicted to cracker women was what you said before. You would end up blind fapping to her porn. :slightly_smiling:


#7

Sir cracker woman has never fallen from my lips. Now 'Sweet sweet vanilla' that is definitely something I would have said.

As far as Ms Texas is concerned, i would fap the black off of my penis if she ever got down with some brothers on video. Not that the white guys are doing her proper. It's just the principle of it all.


#8

No wait that was me that said cracker women. My bad.


#9

Im still waiting for Madison Ivy to suck a chocolate.


#10

chamuge are cool!


#11

LMFAO


#12

x2


#13

Jesus, I was tricked into doing a dance called "The Bump", and my...buttocks came into contact with the....buttocks of another young man.


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#18

first of all you will not technically be able because all the nuclear weapon have been inactivated by ET civilizations, to prevent eventual self terrestrial human destructive behaviours could impact also other civilization. We can give shit to ourselves but when this goes to touch other dimensions it will not be permitted! So for this we are safe :smiley:


#19

you only can help yourself

you are Jesus yourself too, you need to be aware and use that consciousness to create the life you prefer


#20

This is the third thread I've read today that reminded me of Repo Man. Only one of 'em didn't have a post by our "own personal Jesus"...

Edit: he posted on all three.