Really? Read what you posted:
"I'm kind of curious about this one. I wasn't able to find the original study on the internet. Wouldn't cold showers INCREASE fat storage to combat the cold and therefore cortisol? Cold showers increase noradrenaline, a stress hormone."
Your statement says at the end "Cold showers increase noradrenaline, a stress hormone". You seem pretty set in those beliefs, as you didn't say "cold showers MIGHT increase noradrenaline" but rather that they DO.
You're right buddy, I can't explain all the intricacies of what happens when you take a cold shower. But I don't have to. NO ONE in their right mind would. No one who is muscular, strong, successful, good looking or rich ever gave a damn.
And, just for a second, lets say cold showers increase cortisol (an essential hormone by the way) and decrease testosterone and all this other hoopla you think is happening..........guess what, it is ONLY temporary and all these negative effects would ware off as soon as you got out of the shower.