[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:
Sorry to go a bit off topic, but somewhat related.
In 8th grade I was quite the artist. I could draw all my teachers quite accurately. One time I got a large sheet of paper and drew all my teachers on stage performing as members of a rock band. In it I included the stage lights, cock-rock poses, and the first 2 rows of the audience by the stage.
My English teacher, Mr Stein, saw the drawing and commented on my talents. Then he asked if he could borrow it to show his friends. I innocently (ignorantly) said yes and handed it to him.
Next morning my name was called out over the PA system. “Iron Dwarf please report to the principal’s office!” What could I have done? I was such a goody-two-shoes.
When I walked into the principal’s office, I could see my drawing on his desk. Mr Stein was standing there as well. I was asked to sit down as the principal scolded me for my poor taste.
“Although your drawing is very good, we have no problem with your characterization of the teachers. But you portray people in the audience shooting up and smoking illegal drugs. This is very disrespectful of you to juxtapose such actions in the same context as your teachers. We have no choice but to reprimand you with 3 days Inside Suspension!”
I couldn’t believe it! Sentenced to 3 days sitting doing NOTHING in a classroom of “bad kids”. I was so ashamed I was afraid to tell my dad. Fortunately no letter went home notifying him of my punishment.
After my 3 days, I became somewhat of a hero around the school.
Later that summer, my dad and I were just hangin’ out at the beach when I told him about the drawing and my punishment at school. He was fucking furious! Not at me, but at the school for such a ridiculous thing, and that I missed 3 days of tax-paid education because of some teacher’s butt-hurt over a drawing.
I think I’ve shared this before but who cares, I’ll give the short version.
Senior year, exempt from finals.
Friends over at parents house, which backed up to the baseball field and then high school, replete with mobile home type buildings fashioned as classrooms to house an overflowing student body while a 4th 5A school was being built in the disctrict.
While swimming in the pool and drinking beer, we decided to shoot the buildings with my potato gun, the impact would be very loud and hilarious considering finals.
We got caught by two security gaurds, a maintenance worker calling 911 to report a “bazooka like weapon” being fired at the school and a cop on the other side of the building who heard what sounded like shotgun blasts and requested back up. This was the year of 9/11, things were changing.
Anyways, we saw the security gaurds and ran, not knowing about the other calls. Ultimately the SWAT team with a newly formed anti-terror unit showed up, blocked the street, prepared for a raid on my parents house and even had snipers on neighboring house roofs.
Fortunately, my neighbor was a good buddy and called to ask what was happening. He said I should probably get home to straigten things out, knowing it was late afternoon and dad would be arriving soon. We looked out for each other.
Ultimately, neighborhood cops stayed behind to write a report and joked about their own pranks, laughingly asking to see the potato gun because it was so funny.
Well the confiscated it, the fuckers. Turns out those things are classified as illegal firearms and the DA would accept charges, with me being guilty of actually shooting the school.
Fortunately the cop chose not to file charges, I’d still be in jail.