As I journey on my path of wholeness, I easily get caught up in what I’m not doing. Or things that are “outside” of me, like making sure I stretch, I read that book, or make a journal entry. Only lately have I begun to actually “See” myself. That I’m not just a project to be completed and improved. That self respect is a product of loving all of me, not just the parts that can be outwardly changed. True acceptance is terrifying. What if I love myself, I’ll turn into a lazy bum? All that hippy dippy love crap isn’t fuel. I believe this is because people, (myself included), believe acceptance/love is the same as being passive. Accepting is being a pushover. Love is allowing what is, not what can be. It makes us question what REALLY drives us.
This article got me thinking, and remembering. I’ve been in a similar situation, except I chose to have a 4 year relationship with this person because I agreed with him. I spent 4 long years trying to prove that I was worthy, of love, passion, desire, and many other less tangible things. Turns out I was trying to convince the wrong person.
So deep breath. Here’s to the scars, the wrinkles, stretch marks, and the lumps n’ bumps. Here’s to training because we enjoy the feeling of having a body that’s well used. Here’s to improvement because every day I want to be in awe of myself and achieve what I felt was impossible. Every day I want to fly.
I live by the idea of making everyday better for myself and others. Sometimes, I succeeds, sometimes I don’t. But I have to think critically about what can I do better, what can I change.
I, too, want to fly. And I realize that most times I can’t, so I settle for a jump instead; not to lower my standards, but to remind myself that before anyone can run, we must learn to walk. I’ve learned from working with children for over 7 years that sometimes the small steps matter more; they will eventually lead to giant steps. And while often times movement (sometimes just a turn of the head) sends shooting pain through my head, I still try to pursue this goal.
Self-acceptance isn’t the end-goal, it’s the journey.
[quote]Seachel_25 wrote:
I live by the idea of making everyday better for myself and others. Sometimes, I succeeds, sometimes I don’t. But I have to think critically about what can I do better, what can I change.
I, too, want to fly. And I realize that most times I can’t, so I settle for a jump instead; not to lower my standards, but to remind myself that before anyone can run, we must learn to walk. I’ve learned from working with children for over 7 years that sometimes the small steps matter more; they will eventually lead to giant steps. And while often times movement (sometimes just a turn of the head) sends shooting pain through my head, I still try to pursue this goal.
Self-acceptance isn’t the end-goal, it’s the journey.
[/quote]
Very wise words. And yes I totally agree, some days a jump is all you can do and be proud of the jump. You do it often enough and flying is inevitable :o)