T Nation

Chuck Norris BB Philosophy


#1

Chuck Norris can loose bodyfat by simply staring at it til it leaves his body in fear.

Chuck Norris can build muscle without eating protein. The food he does eat turns to muscle out of sheer respect for him.

When Chuck Norris does a push up he does not push himself up. He pushes the earth down.

Most bodybuilders drink fish oil. Chuck Norris drinks human oil.

Chuck Norris is really 300lbs. The reason he does not look 300lbs is known only to himself.

Flameout does not in fact contain fish oil. It contains Chuck Norris oil.

To increase his protein intake Chuck Norris once eat a 275lb bodybuilder. For breakfast.

To prove that overtraining is for pussy's Chuck Norris once worked out for 3 months straight then banged every female within a 5 mile radius before his PWO shake.

Chuck Norris does not use Swiss Balls, he uses his own balls.

Chuck Norris invented the deadlift. It gets its name because he used to lift the bodys of people he had just killed.

Every piece of furniture in Chuck Norris house is a Total Gym.

Chuck Norris can curl 500lbs. With his beard.


#2

Chuck Norris' bodyfat is below zero.


#3

Keep this shit coming, I find it funny as hell. Do any of you know where to find the list that is circulating the net of Chucks other great feats?

"The good Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck taketh away..."


#4

Yeah,

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

or google it, theres a few other sites.

Look for Mr T facts as well!!


#5

Chuck Norris once created a black version of himself. He shaved it and called it Professor X.


#6

Chuck Norris does curls in the squat rack. Gotta problem with that?


#7

Chuck Norris does curls WITH the squat rack.


#8

Chuck Norris once posted a picture of himself holding a shoe.

No one ever ripped on him.


#9

Fuckin Chuck Norris!


#10

Chuck Norris IS the squat rack


#11

Chuch Norris can do any amount of chin ups he chooses to. He uses his actual chin.


#12

No its Chuck Fuckin Norris.

Fuckin is his middle name not first.


#13

This explains a lot.


#14

Chuck Norris is the world record snatch holder. He once held 370 snatches, having sex with all but two of them. The two snatches he did not have sex with were John Basedow and Tony Little. Instead, he roundhouse kicked them.


#15

Every Powerful Image is Chuck Norris in disguise.


#16

Chuck Norris uses Vin Diesel and Mr T for dumbbells


#17

Every time Chuck Norris forgets to rack the weights, a little kitten dies.


#18

Dodgeball quote.. the last 3 words of the movie is "Fuckin Chuck Norris".


#19

he does not forget to rack them, he racks them where he wants them to go. got a problem with that?


#20

For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.