I’m 33 years old. I’ve chronic fatigue, depression and no libido (and no morning erections. Erections are good if I get horny.) all of my life. I often feel nervous too much and experience anxiety (including social. I’m an introvert). I have apathy which progresses with time.
Also I sweat too much (even in cold place). Also I’ve sleep problems.
My height is 183 cm and my weight is 77 kg.
I consider myself skinny fat. I’ve a layer of fat on my belly.
I’m allergic. I’ve a bit elevated eosinophiles
I hate that I gain weight easily eating almost nothing. By 2013 I found out that it may be due to low testosterone.
In 2013 I went to endocrinologist. I did scrotum ultrasound which showed no problems. I did blood tests which showed
3.5 TSH. For my endo you’re hypothyroid if your TSH >= 2 and free T3, free T4 suck. So she decided I’m subclinical hypothyroid
and prescribed me Eutirox 25 mcg. Also she told me I’ve low normal testosterone. My T is usually in range 3.50-4.20 ng/ml.
So she prescribed me HCG 1500 ME injections every 4th day. Also she told me I’m close to obesity and I have insulin resistance.
Totally she prescribed me omega3, vitamin D, HCG, eutirox, Glucophage Long (Metformin).
The next day after first injection of HCG I felt euphoric ! I was a superman ! I had energy, concentration, creativity, motivation, etc - all things
I’m missing all of my life. I became assertive. Also I got to know what a libido is. I have no libido all of my life. I thought that my problems are solved and I’ll feel
like this forever. But the next day its gone. My T got a bit higher than my baseline. It was a big disappointment. I kept doing my prescriptions for 3 years till 2017. In 2016 my endo
increased my eutirox dose to 75 mcg. In 2017 I noticed that I’m balding near forehead and my hair became weak and thin. I was very angry about it and decided
to stop using prescribed meds. It didn’t help to regrow my hair. I kept trying to find solutions for my problems.
I went to neurologist. She told me to do MRI and ultrasound. Found no problems. Then she prescribed me tranquilazers: strezam and grandaxin. I felt nothing.
I went to psychiatrist and she immediately prescribed me antidepressant Cipralex. I asked my endo about it and she forbid me to use it. She said that
testosterone is the best anti-depressant and prescribed me Omnadren 250 (clone of Sustanon 250) every 2 weeks. I injected it and after that I noticed
that I have better stamina and I had the best sleep ever in my life for a week. After I week I thought I’m dying. I became weak, very anxient, felt pain in my chest.
I decided not to inject it anymore. When I went to my endo again she told me I just need to inject more often. But I didn’t try it anymore.
My depression progresses. I have less & less interests in my life. As docs know nothing I became to do research on my own.
I took vitamin C, A, B (1,2,3,6,9, 12). I found books about amino-acids against depression. I tried l-tryptophan, l-tyrosine, l-phenylalanine, DLPA. I got very painful headache from L-tryptophan. I started to think that my depression is due to lack of dopamine and endorphines, not serotonin. Because sometimes after taking 1-3 DLPA pills my mood really improves
and libido increases.
After a month of gliatilin I got very painful headache.
I took A and E vitamins and overdosed it after a month. After this I discovered that since that time my DHT is 12 times higher than maximum value. And my total T is still in the same
low normal range.
Also I felt much better when I discovered Magnesium citrate.
Tried L-arginine. Makes erection better.
With L-tyrosine my TSH became 1.5 and free T3, T4 are better than ever. I have some anti-TPO. So maybe I’ve Hashimoto.
So most time I hate how I feel. I felt the best after first injection of HCG.
But sometimes I’ve ‘good mood attacks’.
One day I was nervous before sleep. So I took glycine and ate whole blister of it. I failed to sleep and in the morning I became euphoric and horny for a day.
I was in Bali and got a massage there. Felt euphoric and horny for a day.
Immunologist prescribed me Decaris against parasites to take it at night (preventively. its not confirmed that I’ve parasites). Slept great and felt good in the morning.
This year I had a scrotum ultrasound and urologist massaged it hard. After that I woke up in the night full of energy, motivation and very strong erection which lasted till
the morning. This time urologist told me I’ve varicocele.
After my experiments in 2018 frequency of good mood attacks increased a bit. I took DLPA, reduced glutathione, magnesium citrate, cashew nuts (a lot !!
best antidepressive nut!).
I think I’ve chronic fatigue due to problems with mitochondrias.
I continued my research and did simple genetic testing. I discovered that I’ve MTHFR heterozygous mutation, COMT, DRD2 homogeneous genetic mutations.
COMT and DRD2 directly affect dopamine. I’ve G/G variation of COMT which means my COMT enzyme is too active and my dopamine gets destroyed.
DRD2 means that I’ve low density of dopamine receptors.
I had a saliva cortisol test. Its elevated.
My blood estradiol, prolactin are normal. Last year progesterone is below normal or low normal.
In july one of my docs told me he found hidden iron deficiency. He told me to have 4 injections of iron. I did 2. But after that I got a serious arm injury.
So at this moment I only take care about my arm. In hospital I was injected with narcotic painkillers. I had more energy, motivation, mood and libido ! It
worked better than injected testosterone !
So I think my problem is lack of dopamine. I want to try wellbutrin, but I can’t buy it in Russia. I need to go abroad for it. And I can’t because my arm is injured now.
Why I feel bad and what can help me ?