"CHAOS IS THE PLAN: THE PLAN"-A 3 Sentence Training Manual

My grandpa was famous for saying “if you ever want time to pass slowly, hang by your thumbs”, haha.


Hey folks, here some “meat and eggs” when you’re eating out.

Texas Roadhouse. I ordered a full rack of ribs (no sauce), and then, for my sides, I asked if they could just bring me a bowl of the hardboiled eggs that they put on the salad. Homie brought me TWO bowls: one for the salad course and one for the side dish. I, of course, devoured everything

Mainly because I had fasted up until this meal and trained like an animal beforehand. It all works out.

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Another week down, lemme share the unique workouts that transpired

“Battling the Skrae w/ the Aesir Alliance”

40 Minutes

20 Viking Thrusters w/90lbs loaded
1 20kg KB Devil Press

then 19-2, 18-3, etc. Go as far as you can.

I was on rep 2 of 12 Devil Presses when time expired

This is “Blackjack”, but with a particular focus on overhead work. Thrusters are knee flexion focused, while devil presses are triple extension, so you KIND OF get to rest between movements.

“Connacht’s Escape”

Axle Mat Pulls w/rest pause
5+3+3x406

into 40 minutes of

EMOM 5 burpees
Clean each rep and strict press 20kg Kbs

100 reps in 38:55, 104 reps total

This is yet another re-tool of “Kalsu”. I open with the mat pulls just to get in my heavy pulling, and then a rep/time goal with the burpee harmony disrupter. Opening with the heavy mat pulls really puts a good hurt on you to start with.

Here, my week got compromised, so I just got in reps of behind the neck pressing and whatever leftover assistance work I had. I feel like behind the neck pressing is overlooked and pretty essential for strong and fully developed shoulders.

“5 minute KB blitz”

This is a great example of a short and intense overhead workout that you can chunk together as needed to get your 180 minutes a week. I go from thrusters to double half snatch to alternating snatch to throws to clusters.

“Burpee into viper”

Another short/intense workout to get my minutes in. 10 minute EMOM, do a burpee and jump straight into the viper press. Do that 4 times and rest the remainder of the minute. I held on through 8 rounds, but rounds 9 and 10 had me down to 3.

On the nutrition front, after that log workout I went to Texas De Brazil and ate about 300g of protein in 1.5 hours, so that was excellent. I’m seeing my body fill out quite well. I feel like I may need to get in a little more posterior chain work. I’m doing 3x a week breathing squats for 1x20, which has been great for putting on muscle in general, and I get in a lot of lower body work with my daily squats and all the leg drive stuff, but there’s still some avenue for more. Sled would be a great choice as well.

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Finished out the 4th week. The flexibility of this plan really shined through this week. Had an unexpected schedule change: Mrs came down with a real bad bug and I stayed home from work to tend to her. Part of that included NOT getting up at o’dark stupid to get in a workout beforehand, because I wanted to be by her side in case she needed me, so I prioritized what was important and got in some short and focused workouts to get in my total minute goal.

Under a stricter plan, this would have just been a “failed week”, but simply having a goal of total minutes of overhead work really allowed me to play around here.

I’m going to share some of the more unique workouts that happened this week as a result of the flexibility

TRAINING

”Wheel of Pain”

40 minute workout

140 reps of 20kg double kettlebell clean once and strict press away in 20 minutes using Dan John’s Ladders (2-3-5-10)

“Prayer to Crom”

(5) Axle Mat Pulls w/12 breath rest pause 6+4+3x405 Immediately into the “Horrifically Awful 30 Minute Overhead Anyhow Challenge” from Jamie Lewis’ “365 Day of Brutality”

Using 143lbs (approx 85% bodyweight), I got 124 reps Finish with Kroc rows w/115. I felt like this workout in particular REALLY captured the “put weight over your head for X time” thought process.

One burpee into a cluster, then each round add a thruster

“GO HOME CONAN: YOU’RE DRUNK”

Original plan was a 15 minute workout, but I was so close to 50 rounds at the end I just finished it out.
100lb keg

  • Sprawl onto keg

  • One motion keg overhead

  • Overhead carry to crash pad

  • Drop

  • Repeat

Carrying the keg locked out really put some time in the “weight overhead” arena

Turkish Get ups-A creative way to employ the “weight overhead” idea

Burpee chin into devil press into cluster

EATING

On the nutrition front, having to stay home unexpectedly had some benefits. I got to make some more elaborate lunches than I typically do when I have to go in to work. PLUS, I needed to clear out some freezer space since I was going on my first hunt and anticipated bringing home some venison (which I should have about 70lbs heading my way soon…which is just awesome).

I DID go beyond just meat and eggs: bringing in pork crackling and grassfed sour cream as well, which is something I tend to do when I’m trying to put on some weight, but the meals could have easily just had more meat/eggs for a similar outcome.

4 lamb chops, egg whites, pork cracklin and grassfed sour cream


Pork ribs, egg whites and grassfed sour cream


7 air fried chicken wings with egg whites, cracklin and grassfed sour cream


3 piedmontese grassfed new york strip kabobs, applegate farms bacon, Don Lee farms chicken sausage, and a 5 vital farms whole egg/2 egg white omelete with some jarlsburg swiss on top and new zealand grassfed cheddar on the inside The omelet was a product of my Ninja Indoor griddle: it turned out HUGE!

Ribs and eggs, using that same Ninja technique

And even when out traveling: Went to a Culver’s and got *2 Double swiss burgers, added 2 patties

OUTCOME

You can see in the videos: I’ve grown stupidly lean despite absolutely eating my face off. My body continues to reshape into something really incredible and dangerous. I’ve noticed my upper torso getting meaty again, while the squats are keeping my lower body strong. When I have more time to screw around, I like to get in a bit more focused assistance work to bring up some lagging areas, but in a week like this, where I had to really prioritize, it was good to have a solid vector.

EVOLVING THE PLAN

The more I run this, the more I’m thinking “change levels” might need to become an actual part of the plan. I could see the training prescription being “Spend 180 minutes a week picking something off the ground and putting it over your head and/or changing levels”. I keep throwing it into the training and it keeps proving itself to be valuable.

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Time for another update for the week. This week, much like last week, was crazy. This time, instead of unexpected illnesses, it was EXPECTED craziness due to the holidays. I had a 5 day holiday weekend, which meant more time with the family and less time letting my training meander, so things pivoted and changed. Chaos remained the plan, and the program continues to prove to be very adaptable. Plus, with it being Thanksgiving, I had a VERY solid opportunity to feast on meat and eggs, and, in fact, on Thanksgiving day, I ate both drumsticks, both wings and a large portion of the dark meat off of a 19lb bird.

That was after accomplishing THIS traditional workout of mine

, which I do every Thanksgiving: max rep trap bar pulls with 135lbs. This year, I managed 301, which is not a PR for reps, but IS a PR at my current bodyweight

And, of course, that doesn’t include ANY overhead work, so this didn’t get to count toward my 180 total minutes in the week…but Chaos is the plan, and sometimes we get to do things off plan.

To work off the hangover of this workout, I did “The Cimmerian Swears to Never Drink Again”

That boiled down to starting with 23 breathing squats, followed by 30 minutes of cleaning a 100lb keg and pressing it overhead, switching sides each time, for a total of 118 reps.

I also made up my own kettlebell complex here

Boiled down to burpee into single arm clean and press into single arm front squat. I went for 150 rounds of that with a 20kg bell.

And then, on Sunday, for recovery, I did a combination of GI Jane and Pukie Brewster WODs, which is 100 burpee chins followed by 100 burpees

Here, I was bring pretty liberal regarding “putting stuff over my head”, because it’s only my hands that are moving there…but my shoulders were nuked when it was done.

Earlier in the week, short on time, I did “In Chains”, which was breathing squats with chains followed by 10 minutes of EMOM pressing chains overhead (first 5 rounds was sets of 10, last 5 was sets of 5)

This one was cute: “Unscrupulous Mercenary Among Waring Empires”

Gave it that name because I was alternating between Turkish Get Ups and Viking Thrusters. 40 minutes, EMOM do a viking thruster w/90lbs loaded on axle, between thrusters do Turkish get-ups. Add a thruster per round until you get beat by the clock, then start over at one. Absolutely torches the shoulders.

And also had some little quick workouts in there. This one has potential: do a burpee, then clean and single arm press a kettlebell

Similar to that complex I posted earlier: just simpler.

Already mentioned some of the feasting, but let me include yet ANOTHER example of meat and eggs: leftover turkey thigh (which gives you perspective on just how damn big our bird was) alongside 4 fried eggs. Funny story about the eggs: I brought them home from the grocery store, the carton slipped out of my hand and 4 of the eggs had cracks in their shell. The Mrs just fried them right up, figuring no point in wasting them. That’s MY kind of problem solving. Both covered in grassfed sour cream

Also, got my doe processed from my hunt, so expect venison to feature pretty regularly in my meat and eggs here

AAAAAAnd I weighed in at 174.8 this morning, which is up 8lbs. Everything is working well: strength and size are up, conditioning is solid, and training is chaotic while nutrition is fantastic.

I do a submission grappling tournament on Sunday. First time I’ve grappled since 2005. Definitely some chaos in the plan there.

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