T Nation

Canada

I do not mean to offend anyone by this post at all. I do not hate Canada. I went to Canada once…Martha’s Vineyard and PE Island.
What is the deal with Canada? Why do some US citizens talk derisively about it? Why do they call it a “socialist state?” Is it b/c of their health care system? Who runs Canada? Do they have a parliment and a prime minister. Does each province have a govenor like our states? Is it a nice place to live? Are Canadians proud to be Canadians? If it sucks then why does it suck?

I am asking this stuff b/c I was reading a post here that jestingly said something like “well canada isn’t bad for a socialist state” and it started to make me wonder.

I do not mean to ask stupid questions but I am too lazy, exhausted, and sore right now to go dig out an encyclopedia and look up Canada under C.

Tiff, the differences between Canada and the US are actually quite small. Yes, there are variations in government form, but this is of little consequence to the average person.

We have freedom of speech, though there are restrictions on “hate speech”. We have a charter of rights associated with our constitution. We all generally worry about the same things in life as people in the US do. Y’know, finding a mate, having kids, climbing the corporate ladder, and so on.

So, most of the time, except for accents, different money and generally trends that run several years behind the States, life is pretty damned similiar here.

Generally, when you hear baloney here on the forums it is either ignorant blather or people acting childish and trying to provoke a response.

Oh yeah, lest I forget, Canadians generally do take pride in being Canadian.

to add to what vroom said…

we also have moose and hockey players and sometimes we even have hockey players named “Moose”

All in all Canadians are pretty much the same as Americans.

vroom:

It seems that you as a Canadian are able to speak whatever ill you want of the USA (and you should have that right). When someone makes a remark about canada it is simply “blather.” How many negative comments have you made about the USA related to government leadership, military etc. When you dish you have to take my friend! Smile.

Tiffy - a picture is worth a thousand words. A typical Canadian…

Zeb, if you have actual criticism to share about Canada, feel free. I won’t be offended.

I don’t think I’ve insulted the US, though I have certainly offered criticism on various topics as they’ve appeared in the threads. I have probably insulted the Bush administration. I know I’ve insulted and been insulted personally. The difference is huge.

However, I have also taken care to state many times that I’ve both lived and worked in the US and that I love it there. This has been offered with my harshest criticisms so that people will realize I don’t intend blanket insult.

If I’ve cast a general insult at the US, point it out to me and I’ll gladly apologize for it, as that would not be my intent.

Anyway, if anyone in the US really wants the discussion forums to focus on Canadian topics I’ll be happy to criticize Canadian issues as well. Our countries are very alike indeed, we too have our idiot politicians, policies and administrations.

Finally, if you are out there making blanket insulting statements about Canada I’d again state they are probably made out of ignorance or an attempt to get a reaction. The same would be true for someone making blanket insulting statements about the US.

Sorry for the hijack Tiff.


I am extremely proud to be a Canadian. A strong economy and beautiful scenery what more could you ask for?

ZEB just let me say something here, yes Vroom may criticize American foreign policy and such, but quite frankly what do you know about Canada? You see the majority of us Canucks always know what is happening in the US. Our newspapers,our television newscasts, all media sources contain news on the US. I have a hunch that not too many Americans could answer the questions Tiffy asked.

As for the socialist comment, it’s understandable. Previous governments made this country out to be a welfare state, promising way too much for the taxes they brought in. Luckily the past decade brought in an era of strict fiscal management.

Paul Martin is the current Prime Minister, he replaced Jean Chretien about a year ago. Before that he was finance minister. Each province/ territory has a premier.

If you really want to learn about Canada download some Molson Canadian commercials. That or watch the Simpsons, they usually have some good stuff in there if you are quick enough to pick it up.

As Mike Meyers said, there are 2 things Canadians have a passion for: hockey and comedy.

I like Canada… except for the weather. I have lived all over the western side of this big country, and this is what I have discovered.

West coast- People are a bit more cautious in the larger centers, I (little me) actually intimidated a person enough that he would rather walk with the traffic than pass me on the sidewalk. The people are still polite in the big west coast cities, but the random conversation starting is generally left up to you. CUTE ASIAN GIRLS

Small cities and towns are awesome on the west coast, they are generally warm and very beatiful with the mountains and orchards and so on and so forth.

Alberta… well they have cowboys. Yeah thats it. Actually, Alberta isn’t bad, there is alot of fun to be had there, you can go from nice skiing to good dirt biking trails, to … well whatever you can do with miles and miles of flat land. COWGIRLS WEAR TIGHT PANTS

And they have cowboys.

Saskatchewan- It has a pleasant geometric shape. We have some good fishing, nice canoeing rivers, the air is pretty darn clean. You can hunt. animals. its kind of an outdoorsy place. OUR WOMEN ARE FAT AND LAZY.

Thats about the extent of the provinces that I have lived in.

Oh yeah, we have a Prime Minister, he can hold office as long as we keep electing him. He has a heck of alot of control over the country.

Most of us are proud to be Canadian, we are like a quieter America. Much like the guy at a party who hangs out with the loud people, yet he himself is, in comparison, conservative. Yet if removed from the louder people, he is actually quit funny.

a list of things that may need to be corrected.

-I do not live in an igloo, although I have built one.

-I don’t have sled dogs, although a dog has pulled me while I was on a sled.

-Yes… I call it a bunnyhug, not a hoodie, Why? Because my shirts aren’t called sleevies, and my pants aren’t called leggies, and most of all my underwear is not called a pouchie.

-WE ARE NORTH

-I probably don’t know your friend that lives in Canada

-Adding a ‘u’ in words like colour and labour, well we do that just to mess you guys up.

-Our national game is actually Lacrosse, not hockey, although most people here have never played Lacrosse

-Our border crossing guards wear red and white fuzzy sweaters, yours wear flack jackets and carry weapons.

-Our money sucks, buy from us.

-Dave

As a continuum of ShortDave’s post:

Alberta : debt free due to oil revenues and smart management. Very young population, largest city’s population has doubled in the last 15yrs. When the cowboys cut loose, they spend big, big money. Somewhat resented elsewhere because of its prosperity. I live here now, look me up if you hit Calgary.

Ontario - most populous, containing our capital city Ottawa, and our largest city, Toronto. Has a reputation of being a little dickish. And it takes forever to drive across.
I’d say it would harbour (love the u) the same feel as New York in the States.

Nova Scotia - My home. Suffering economy, now based on tourism after failure of fishery. High emigration rate, although everyone that leaves seems to want to move back at some point. Maritimers (New Brunswick, PEI, NS) have the reputation of the relaxed, easy going, friendly, lower tech folks. Drunker may be the easiest way to describe it.

New Brunswick - Predominantly Francophone, produces alot of potatoes, highly influenced by the Irving Corporation, which employs directly and indirectly a high (some say 40) percentage of the population

Prince Edward Island - again, a great deal of potatoes. Amazing tourism, beauty, and golfing. Smallest province geographically and population.

Newfoundland - hardworking, funny, friendly, simple backwoods sterotype. Best friends you could have. And they have the most sex of any province. In Canada, you don’t hear many Polish jokes. You hear Newfie jokes. This is where the Vikings landed before Chris Columbus was a speck of man-juice in his daddy’s nads.

Quebec - Francophone province, with many different laws. Has been recognized as a distinct culture. High resentment from the rest of the country after a very close separatist referendum in 96 I believe. But, according to Maxim magazine, best strippers in the world.
Those are the ones I’ve spent significant time in.

I believe many of the differences, and yes there are differences, between our nations has a root in the fact that we are still (ceremonially at least) linked to Great Britian. We are a member of the Commonwealth.

Our societies are heavily linked, but differences are readily apparent. Canada considers itself a mosaic, the cultural melting pot due to our high immigration and presence of many worldwide cultures. Canada is less prone to violence (domestically and abroad). The West Edmonton Mall has 3 fully operational submarines. The Canadian Navy has 2. ( or so the joke goes)
There are about 33 million people in Canada, as opposed the the american populaiton approaching 300 million. So everything we do is on a smaller scale.

Canada was ranked the number once country in which to live by the United Nations for several years in a row recently ( I believe Norway/Denmark supplanted us last year).
I have never met a Canadian that was not proud to be so. Hope this helps. And of course, this is all from the point of view of a guy who flips trees as a hobby.

[quote]ShortDave wrote:
CUTE ASIAN GIRLS
[/quote]

This is a HUUUUGE understatement! Im from Vancouver :wink:

CANADIANS SUCK! What’s wrong with you guys?! Why must you persist with these lies that “we are like America”? I’ve spent the last year in Texas assuring southerners that every stereotype they have of our fair country (well, those few who have actually heard of it) are indeed true.
Here are a few examples:
-Our Capital city is Toronto (who the hell has ever heard of Ottawa?)
-we have 5 feet of snow all year long ALL over the country (there are ramps at all border crossings)
-we have 24h of darkness all winter (you wanna talk about S.A.D.?!)
-we DO live in igloos (the ultimate do-it-yourself project)
-we speak French and Eskimo (the only Inuit word I know is “Iqaluit”)
-Terrence and Phillip are National icons (we’d go to war in order to save them)
-The leading causes of death are frostbite and polar bear attack (and often attacks from frostbitten polar bears)
-when our elderly become a burden, we ship them off on an iceflow to ease the food ration on the rest of our clan or tribe (it’s probably a fun ride for the first hour or so)
-your American technology both confuses and delights our simple minds (I once stared at a screen saver for 2 days)

I implore Americans not to listen to those who would spread evil lies about Canada!

Cheers

Ummmm yeah… ignore my other post… I was new to this kee-board thing and I was just mashing random letters. The snow has addled my brain.

MUCKLUKS!!!

-Dave

Thanks for all of the really thoughtful responses! I also started thinking about Canada because I ran into my old high school law teacher who had married a woman from Newfoundland. He always used to crack us up in class with tales of Newfoundland visits involving lots of alcohol and the word “aye.” He actually really likes Canada a lot but told funny stories.

Thanks for taking the time to answer the questions.

I have visited Canada many times and have always been impressed with the beauty of the country. However, the government (and former government) is a bit to liberal for my tastes. If that offends some…sorry. I just think socialized medicine and high taxes are not conducive to long term prosperity.

[quote]tiffy wrote:
Thanks for all of the really thoughtful responses! I also started thinking about Canada because I ran into my old high school law teacher who had married a woman from Newfoundland. He always used to crack us up in class with tales of Newfoundland visits involving lots of alcohol and the word “aye.” He actually really likes Canada a lot but told funny stories.

Thanks for taking the time to answer the questions.[/quote]

Hey Tiffy,

Being a Newfie, the stories about Newfoundland visits being just Alcohol and the word “aye” are true for the Alcohol but I have never heard a Newfie say “Aye”, Newfie’s say “bye” after everything plus also dropping the H’s from words ie “Here” becomes “ere”.

But i have lived in Alberta, Nova Scotia and now in Ontario, but I miss Newfoundland completely. The only thing better then being a Canadian is being a Newfie, no matter where you go in the world, if you meet a fellow Newfie you are friends immediately.

Some Canadian humor.

Q: Why do Canadians screw doggy-style?
A: So both can watch the hockey game.

An American is having his (coffee, croissants, bread, butter and jam) when a Canadian man, chewing gum, sits down next to him.

The American ignores the Canadian who, nevertheless, starts a conversation.

Canadian: “You American folk eat the whole bread?”

American (in a bad mood): “Of course.”

Canadian: (after blowing a huge bubble)“We don’t. In Canada,
we only eat what’s inside. The crusts we collect in a container,
recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to
America.” The Canadian has a smirk on his face.

The American listens in silence.

The Canadian persists: “Do you eat jelly with the bread??”

American: “Of Course.”

Canadian: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling).
“We don’t. In Canada we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds,and left overs in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell the jam to America.”

The American then asks: “Do you have sex in Canada?”

Canadian: “Why of course we do”, the Canadian says with a big mirk.

American: “And what do you do with the condoms once you’ve used them?”

Canadian: “We throw them away, of ourse.”

American: “We don’t. In America, we put them in a container, melt them down into chewing gum and sell it to Canada.”

An American, a Scot and a Canuk were in a terrible car accident. They were all brought to the same emergency room, but all three of them died before they arrived. Just as they were about to put the toe tag on the American, he stirred and opened his eyes. Astonished, the doctors and nurses present asked him what happened.

“Well,” said the American, “I remember the crash, and then there was a beautiful light, and then the Canadian and the Scot and I were standing at the gates of heaven. St. Peter approached us and said that we were all too young to die, and that for a donation of $100, we could return to the earth.”

He continued, " So of course, I pulled out my wallet and gave him the $100, and the next thing I knew I was back here."

“That’s amazing!” said one of the doctors, “But what happened to the other two?”

“Last I saw them,” replied the American, “the Scot was haggling over the price and the Canadian was waiting for the government to pay for his.”

You Know You’re Canadian When:

  • You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

  • You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

  • Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in with snow.

  • The local paper covers national and international headlines on two pages, but requires six pages for hockey.

  • The municipality buys a Zamboni before a bus.

  • You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars, and drink pop, not soda.

  • You use a red pen on your non-Canadian textbooks and fill in the missing u’s from labor, honor, and color.

  • You know how to say free, prize and no sugar added in French thanks to your extensive education in bilingual cereal packaging.

  • You know what a toque is.

  • You’ve plugged a car in overnight.

  • You’ve defended your property from trespassers with a lacrosse stick because you don’t own a gun.


Clyde the newfie died in a fire and was burnt pretty bad and the morgue needed
someone to identify the body. So his two best friends, Clem and Zeke, were sent for. Clem went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Clem said “Yup, he’s burnt pretty bad. Roll him over.” So the mortician rolled him over and Clem looked and Said “Nope, ain’t Clyde.”

The mortician thought that was rather strange. Then he brought Zeke to identify the body and Zeke took a look at him and said “Yup, he’s burnt
real bad, roll him over.” The mortician rolled him over and Zeke looked down and said “No, it ain’t Clyde.”

The mortician asked "How can you tell? Zeke said “Well, Clyde had two
assholes.” “What? He had two assholes?” said the mortician.

"Yup, everyone in town knew he had two assholes. Every time we went to
town, folks would say “Here comes Clyde with them two assholes.”

By the way, what the hell is a newfie?

For those who say Canadians are just like Americans, I would recommend you to read up on social values between the two. Michael Adams points out the difference quite clearly in his book entitled Fire and Ice. (link below)

We are far more liberal than our American counterparts on a large numbers of issues. Violence, religion, healthcare, racism, homosexuality and gun control to name a few.

I love everything about this country. The people, the seasons and yes our crumbling healthcare.

I believe that our quality of life is better becasue of these liberal views.

That’s my take on my country.

I would have to agree with Moerte. Canada and the U.S. are different in many ways regarding values. But at the same time I think we have a lot in common. I think the origins of both our countries help explain the differences. Many Canadians do have an inferiority complex, but that is natural when you look at the size difference. 30 million to something around 280 million. Also, Martha’s Vineyard is not in Canada. Its in New England.

Since I grew up in the Thumb of Michigan I spent plenty of time in Canada, heck Canadian Coins were even accepted as legal tender in the great lakes state.

I’ve always had a blast there, the people are awesome and not as uptight as Americans on the whole.

Even when I was stuck up in Cold Lake Alberta at the Air Base a good time was had by all. Canadians are definitely my kind of folks and it’s also my kind of country-side.

[quote]super saiyan wrote:
By the way, what the hell is a newfie?
--------------------------------[/quote]

A Newfie is anyone born in Newfoundland, Canada. For thos who don’t know Newfoundland is the most eastly province of Canada.

There is also a tradition that anyone from the mainland can be “Screeched In” to become an honorary Newfie, this involves repeating a saying, kiss a Cod Fish and taking a shot of Screech. Screech is a Rum, made with molasses and a few other things added.