I'm 39 year old male. I have Addison's disease (John f Kennedy had it as well) since it was diagnosed at the age of 2. I take hydrocortisone florinef thyroxine and testosterone injects since the age of 16.
When I was young the doctors gave me huge amounts of hydro and that made me want to eat all the time and I was very fat. I got beat up a lot and was teased/made fun of non stop.
Anyways it's a deeply embedded trauma and I guess BB is a way for me as well as for others to somehow "protect" oneself from people picking on me/us. At least for me it is. Yes i've been going to psychiatrist for a few years now.
Anyways I started at 154 lbs. I now weigh 196. I wanted to ask a few questions please.
I shove tons of vitamins in myself but It seems the gains don't come fast enough.
I trained consistently for 5.5 years where I gained most of my mass. after which I stopped for 4 years. My wife wanted children and I had to take chorigon/pregnyl or menogan (I can't recall it was some years back) shots so to up the sperm count which was nil. I felt like crap on them and my training/diet world came crashing down.
I know for sure I don't want children..and personally I don't think I can have any anyways. But this is because of the Addison's disease and not the vitamins I was taking. Which was mainly tons of testoviron depot and nandrolone decanoate and some cypionate. If I don't get a test shot (even when off the vitamins) I can't get it up. I lose a lot of muscle mass, no hair growth, stuff like that.
I do get fat very easily. I also want to add that when I was 16 I took HGH for 1.5 years and grew 12". I should have been taller but never took the shots every day because certain days the injection hurt so much that I was scared the next day. I'm glad though. 6' is more than enough for me and not the best for a bodybuilder.
Anyways in our family everyone is big and my brothers both have pretty good genetics and grew quite a lot when they were training. but for me it's 2 steps forward, 1.9 steps back.
I've been divorced for 3 great years (cheated on me. while I was shooting weddings she was getting something else shot in her)
I've been training for a year now and have been on sus ever since the beginning. I changed from testoviron depot which I didn't like since it takes a while to kick in and I get depressed towards the end of it's effect. I got some money from a bike accident and have been on nandrolona d (deca) sustamed (sus) and sus (organon) prescribed by my endocrine Dr (twice per month..yea, sure thing doc!).
I took 300mg of primo depot for 10 weeks and that was some kick ass stuff. I should be getting more primo very soon to add to my sus/dec combo. I can't wait. I take around 500mg deca and 500mg sus which is divided and injected everyday. I have vials and pull out the dose. I don't mind the injections so much, but scared as hell to try anywhere else besides the glutes.
I take 10mg per day of the recommended dose of hydro which is 15mg morning/5mg afternoon, unless I train and then add 5mg so I have strength. The hydro is like a double edged sword. On one side I need it to live and on the other it breaks down muscle. My training is based on MM hit training. although I do add a few more sets here and there.
I train every 4-7 days, training legs twice to every one time upper body. I can't train anymore than that as I don't recover fast enough. I did the 5 times per week, 3 times per week and none of those worked for me. I feel best when doing the heavy weights/low sets/reps works best for me.
My diet is clean:
8:30 nitro core 24 ON
10:00 250grams cottage cheese -150gr whole wheat bread vegetable
1:00 160grams chicken breast -140grams uncle bens brown rice (not instant) 1 tablespoon BBQ
4:00 160grams either chicken liver/sirloin steak/Norwegian pink salmon- 140 grams UBBrice
7:00 160grams chicken breast- either potato or rice again
10:00 "" with UBBrice
multivitamins/1500 IU vitamin d (very low in blood tests) and 5 liters of water per day.
3 tangerines and 1-2 red apples between meals.
50 minute fast walks every other day.
Friends and family say I look great, but there isn't a day I look in the mirror and i'm partially satisfied. I realize 1 year is very little and I think I will only be happy after another year of training. My hope is to go to the beach in a nice unico bikini and look decent. wierd I know. I haven't gone to the beach in the day for years and when I did it was with the gf at night and always fully clothed. I don't think I can ever get huge but I would be very happy if I got to 210 with lower body fat than I have now.
What other things can I do to help me maximize growth?
Can I take steroids indefinitely? meaning long term, of 2 or more years?
Again, I don't want children. I wouldn't mind finding a gf with a child and not so certain I want to get married. I'm hesitant to even have a GF since all they want to do is go out on days I need to train and other issues as well. They just don't seem to understand why I invest all this effort if I look great already. sheesh. I do have a lot of offers from girls so choosing is not an issue. not being egotistical but training/food will be priority over the GF.
I apologize for the long post. I have been thinking of posting this for a long time but was very nervous.