Borrowing Money from Family

[quote]niksamaras wrote:
Fellas, it’s only money. If a CLOSE family member needs them and you can spare some, give them to them and never expect to get payed back. [/quote]

I like this.

:slight_smile:

[quote]Nards wrote:

[quote]bdocksaints75 wrote:
Yup my mom borrowed 4 grand from me a few years ok , I haven’t seen a dime since[/quote]
Holy shit that’s gotta be the worst one to lend money to. I mean she’s always got that “I brought you into fucking existence” card to play when you try to get the money back.[/quote]

“And, I can always put a lien on your car.”

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:

[quote]niksamaras wrote:
Fellas, it’s only money. If a CLOSE family member needs them and you can spare some, give them to them and never expect to get payed back. [/quote]

I like this.

:-)[/quote]

In some cases you can expect a decent amount of resentment even for doing THAT. For some reason humans have a real knack for holding generosity against people, it might be because it highlights their own shortcomings or whatever, but I’ve seen this happy PLENTY. “Why should I pay him back right now? He has plenty of money!”

In general I would say avoid lending money at all costs to people you know, and as a second rule I would say never loan what you cant afford to give away.

[quote]bdocksaints75 wrote:
Yup my mom borrowed 4 grand from me a few years ok , I haven’t seen a dime since[/quote]

lol, my sister and I fell into that trap too.

When I had bad credit card debt, my dad paid it off for me because the interest rate was so high. Instead of paying the credit card bills, I paid him a monthly fee and he charged me a pretty low interest rate. Never missed a payment and when I graduated the last $1000 or so he didn’t have me pay as a grad present.

[quote]MartyMonster wrote:

[quote]Johnny T Frisk wrote:
Neither a borrower nor a lender be.[/quote]

Well that concept would totally destroy the foundations of our financial system.[/quote]

why? He’s not a bank…

Probably one of the greatest stories of friendship I have is one time I lent a buddy $500 he needed and a couple of years later I asked him if he could get the money together before I returned to Canada for a vacation…and he did!

If you really want to know what someone is worth, lend him a few hundred if he asks for it.

If he pays it back without you having to remind him, great.

If not, he is worthless and you learned that lesson in one of the easier ways.

I’ve never lent.

I’ve just given.

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:
I’ve never lent.

I’ve just given. [/quote]

Good man.

Some assholes never borrow, they just take.

[quote]Cuso wrote:

[quote]Iron Dwarf wrote:
I’ve never lent.

I’ve just given. [/quote]

Good man.

Some assholes never borrow, they just take.[/quote]

Well, technically I never borrow money, only take it. But in the sense that it is a favor.

I tend to agree. Gift if small amounts.

I have invested (not lent) in family members’ businesses, but I treated it just like any investment with a drawn-up contract, etc, and made clear business is business.

I’ve also flat-out refused to invest on many more occassions because it might screw up the family dynamic.

[quote]Jewbacca wrote:
I tend to agree. Gift if small amounts.

I have invested (not lent) in family members’ businesses, but I treated it just like any investment with a drawn-up contract, etc, and made clear business is business.

I’ve also flat-out refused to invest on many more occassions because it might screw up the family dynamic.[/quote]

qft

Money can destroy many relationships. I have seen it first hand with my parents. Not fun stuff.

[quote]Nards wrote:
I never thought of that…how you’d have to watch what you buy…

It reminds me of when I was home (Winnipeg) for a visit last month. Lots of my family were over and we had lots of beer. But my nephew, age 27 ( but I sort of still think of him as much younger) drank quite a bit of the beer without supplying any, but I was OK with that as 24 cans of Molson isn’t too expensive and I make good money whatever…but my brothers were a little miffed.

Then my nephew came in with a bullhorn he’d bought on a lark. It cost $40. Then I was like WTF?![/quote]

Was he willing to share the bullhorn?

It’s tricky but i like to think if i ever needed to borrow then my family would be willing. In fact my family have offered on several occasions such as for houses and business etc however other than a few minor things I have always declined. In fact if family lent me money for business i’d hope to repay them and more back than what they would have received in interest. Sometimes you just need money to get something off the ground though.

Just like if my family needed a lone of me then I’d be willing to grant it if i had some handy.
As they say if you are lending to family or friends don’t think of it as a lone but more of a gift. If you get paid back then fantastic if not never mind and move on.

It’s a sad world we live in if we are unable to lend money to and don’t trust our family, those who we are suppose to be close to and have each others backs no matter what. Maybe I’m there for the taking by an evil family member but i think if you don’t show them trust and favour then you won’t get any back.

Depends if the person is truth- and respectful.

I learned it the hard way, borrowed my mom a few thousand bucks as a student. Once she phoned me if I could lent her some money for study books for my oldest sister who still went to highschool that time. I asked her how much and came to an agreement somewhere in between how much I could miss that month.

Fifteen minutes later she rang again… in retrospect there wasn’t any shame in her voice and she asked if I could borrow her more. Never saw the money or the other thousands of bucks again, even after asking her a few times. Haven’t borrowed her money since… hell, haven’t even had contact with her the last year.

But there is a lot more to that story. =)