T Nation

Blowing Off Loved Ones

Last September I went and visited my old roomate in San Diego, I went out there to look at a condo she just bought that I was planning on moving into. We had lived together for a year here in Arizona and everything had gone extremely well, we were still really close so this looked like a good move.

Well somewhere on this trip in the middle of alcohol we decided to sleep together, ouch. Needless to say to make a long story short we had a bit of drama between us, combined with my best friend in the world moving out to Arizona to do ROTC and myself landing a pretty good job working for a vitamin distributor I kinda said screw San Diego for the time being.

Now its April and she just came out here to Arizona for her birthday after reconciling with her long time girlfriend who she hadnt spoken to in almost a year. She got into town Thursday night and I met up with her at a local bar where after about 5 minutes talking to her I was promptly blown off and pretty much got the drift she wanted me to leave(although she denied it), she told me I looked bad(not 260 pounds at 10% like when I lived with her), which normally would of been fine - we had that kind of honesty before but topped on a bunch of other things it doesnt make me like her very much at the moment.

Anyways so last night was her birthday. She called me at 9 AM to go to the pool… I ignored the call until about 3 pm when she called again, talked to her for a little bit… she called again at 7pm, 9pm and 11 to tell me where her and her friend were and I told her I’d get back to her because I was at a friend’s about 20 minutes away. I never called and got a text from her around 1 that went “im so dissapointed you’re not here.”

Anyways thats the backstory and my question is, was it wrong to have blown her off on her birthday?

To answer your question, it’s bad to be in a situation in which you have to blow people off on their birthday.

But she had it coming. Standing your ground was your only choice.

Either that, or going over and fucking her.

Dude, what I think is that what you did was fine however I would of done 1 or both of the following.

1- Ask her to meet you alone and ask her what is going on ( ie ask her why she was cold to you before and why now is she acting like she gives a shit) It could be that she still likes you or maybe she was just using you because she didnt know anyone else. hanging out with just 1 person does get boring after awhile, if your with two ppl its more fun.

2- Go meet her after she calls you a few times, ie, around 9 or 10 and pull her aside and ask her what her prob is.

Lastly, if she bullshits you, i would do the following;

make out with her and bring her back to your house and fuck her with all your anger than kick her out… hahaha im such an ass i know… and tell her to never call you again.

You are a dude and she is a girl. When you talk about her girlfriend it sounds like a sexual relationship.

If this is the case it sounds complicated. Does she consider herself a lesbian or bisexual?

Is her girlfriend lesbian or bi?

You may be better off keeping the away from the situation. Unless you think you can pull off the threesome of course. :slight_smile:

good replies… thanks guys, yeah i was thinking about the angry fuck too. then i got to thinking what if she doesnt want to hook up again? then i look like more of a loser then ripping her up with my dick.

and no its not her girlfriend… its her female friend… no lesbianism

im glad i stood my ground. im really good at that when its a girl i dont care about

So did you stay in touch with her after you fucked her the first time? Or were you a shmuck and gave a friend the silent treatment after bedding her?

Sounds like the silent treatment she was giving you was either a) hurt feelings and a “see how you like it” attitude, or b) misread.

If she didn’t want face time, she wouldn’t have rung you up over and over again on her birthday. Of course, it could be that she also had some kind of psychotic revenge in place, and was disappointed that you didn’t show to take your lumps. :wink: