So there I was, at the grocery store on a Friday night. When you’re a family man, there’s no need to go out on Friday nights. I shop in the evening with my wife and 2 boys, its not as crowded. I cant stand the old people and soccer moms getting in my way.
So here’s the good part. You know those scooters that fat people use because they’ve gotten too fat to walk? Well, there was 2 kids each riding one through the store tonight. They were like 14 or 15. Up and down the aisles they go, side by side in a drag race at times. For some reason they were really, really pissing me off. I was going over in my head what I was going to say to them the next time they came around us.
Well, like the assshats they were, they come towards us. I look at them. “Come over here.”
They look at each other then back at me. I havent looked away, I’m still staring them down. They come over to me. While looking them in the eye the whole time I go “Go put those back right now, or I will give you a reason to need them.”
I was prepared for a little smart ass comment too. The one started to mouth off about not having to listen to me. I still hadnt looked away from them. “Do I look like I’m kidding?” Stunned silence for a few seconds. Then, one says “sorry, sir.” They put them away and I didnt even see them in the store after that.