Best Martial Art or Combat Style for Me

[quote]jasmincar wrote:
Hello everyone, recently I found myself getting in alot of confrontation in all kinds of place with idiots that wanted to fight me. I respect people who likes combat sports but personnaly I really don’t care about fighting and I don’t wanna fight. If I could live my life without fighting anybody I would be happy. I am cold-tempered (I really am) and I don’t seek confrontation.

What would be the best thing for me to learn that would get me out of trouble if some psycho wanted to attack me. I reasonned that I would just pierce his eyes or rip his balls or some nasty stuff but I doubt I could do it without getting some damage.

I don’t want to go around with a knife or a gun and I don’t want to spend let’s say more than 5 hours a week practicing it. (A little less than 45 min a day)

What would be the best thing to learn for me?[/quote]

What to do if some psycho attacks you? Well, if s/he is really psycho, then deterrence won’t work so you’re back to shooting them with a bazooka.

Oh, or did you mean you want to know what to do if it’s just a jerk? Learn what the definition of self-defense is and be able to eyeball if you are indeed able to invoke it as a claim. See the issue is that there is fighting – which is what (mostly) males ages 16 - 25 do and have in common with other early adult mammals as they all try to get a rung on the social ladder, then there is actual predatory violence. Contrast with what tigers do to prey vs. what they do to each other. Very, very different. Since you are a social animal, (“mid-sized primate”) it is the social aspects that get you: most people have a hard time separating existential crises from physical ones, so that a threat to status, esteem etc. is lumped together with an actual predatory attack. Literally, losing face in front of your friends or girlfriend is every bit as awful as the Big Bad Wolf. Least until you’ve tangled with the BBW. Then you are a bit more sober about it all…

So what are you really seeking? A system so you can comfortably do a bit of dueling and always come out ahead? Those are Combat Sports. They are different from, say, a pointed study of how to be a sniper, which is what you’d do if there was a serious threat you needed to eliminate (e.g. you find yourself on that island with a bunch of velociraptors.) Combat Sports are, as other have pointed out, are labor intensive and precisely because of their limited nature. A partial commitment to training one will help a bit, but not much, whereas learning some self-defense (which can just be awareness training + running like Hell) takes a lot less time and effort.

A couple of acquaintances of mine have written books on this very topic. You (all) should check them out:

The Little Black Book of Violence by Lawrence Kane and Kris Wilder

Meditations on Violence by Rory Miller.

Both are excellent. Truly excellent.

– jj

we really have to find a way to get rid of the usual weekly spam here

…“is krav maga better then the karate kid’s style to cripple this bully in high school?”

…“halp i want looz some weight whatz better krav maga or UFC I also want to have the abz”

[quote]jj-dude wrote:

[quote]jasmincar wrote:
Hello everyone, recently I found myself getting in alot of confrontation in all kinds of place with idiots that wanted to fight me. I respect people who likes combat sports but personnaly I really don’t care about fighting and I don’t wanna fight. If I could live my life without fighting anybody I would be happy. I am cold-tempered (I really am) and I don’t seek confrontation.

What would be the best thing for me to learn that would get me out of trouble if some psycho wanted to attack me. I reasonned that I would just pierce his eyes or rip his balls or some nasty stuff but I doubt I could do it without getting some damage.

I don’t want to go around with a knife or a gun and I don’t want to spend let’s say more than 5 hours a week practicing it. (A little less than 45 min a day)

What would be the best thing to learn for me?[/quote]

What to do if some psycho attacks you? Well, if s/he is really psycho, then deterrence won’t work so you’re back to shooting them with a bazooka.

Oh, or did you mean you want to know what to do if it’s just a jerk? Learn what the definition of self-defense is and be able to eyeball if you are indeed able to invoke it as a claim. See the issue is that there is fighting – which is what (mostly) males ages 16 - 25 do and have in common with other early adult mammals as they all try to get a rung on the social ladder, then there is actual predatory violence. Contrast with what tigers do to prey vs. what they do to each other. Very, very different. Since you are a social animal, (“mid-sized primate”) it is the social aspects that get you: most people have a hard time separating existential crises from physical ones, so that a threat to status, esteem etc. is lumped together with an actual predatory attack. Literally, losing face in front of your friends or girlfriend is every bit as awful as the Big Bad Wolf. Least until you’ve tangled with the BBW. Then you are a bit more sober about it all…

So what are you really seeking? A system so you can comfortably do a bit of dueling and always come out ahead? Those are Combat Sports. They are different from, say, a pointed study of how to be a sniper, which is what you’d do if there was a serious threat you needed to eliminate (e.g. you find yourself on that island with a bunch of velociraptors.) Combat Sports are, as other have pointed out, are labor intensive and precisely because of their limited nature. A partial commitment to training one will help a bit, but not much, whereas learning some self-defense (which can just be awareness training + running like Hell) takes a lot less time and effort.

A couple of acquaintances of mine have written books on this very topic. You (all) should check them out:

The Little Black Book of Violence by Lawrence Kane and Kris Wilder

Meditations on Violence by Rory Miller.

Both are excellent. Truly excellent.

– jj[/quote]

Great post. How do you know those guys? I love their work.