It’s funny man. I put all this emphasis in working out hard. Basically my one main goal for max strength was to squat double my body weight. I got it. I’m happy. Now I have to squat 2.5x bodyweight. In the grand scheme of things it’s so insignificant. I don’t understand why I like being able to squat x#of lbs so much. There’s no extrinsic motivation. I’m not rewarded socially. Everyone at my gym is a body builder so they couldn’t care less about a squat with x amount of weight. Girls don’t care how much I can squat or deadlift. A 2x body weight squat is far from special in the strength and power sports world. It wouldn’t earn me any kind of respect on tnation.
It feels slightly mentally retarded. I don’t care that much about my social life. School pisses me off because I’m sick of learning about the tissue development of nematodes. I just go to the gym and lift x # of lbs for x # of reps and I feel like I’ve accomplished some amazing feat. After that I come home and blow school work off to read tnation articles. If spent all day friday pissing into the wind reading shit on tnation. Maybe I have some kind of additional psychosis that results in a false sense of accomplishment. That’s kind of why I quit playing video games. I would spend all of this time controlling the variables in my own fishbowl then step outside my door and realize evolution in the pond had left me behind. There’s got to be something wrong with me. I make my own games up, ones no one else plays, beat them, and feel like I’ve done something special.