T Nation

Beat the Crap Out of Some Big Guy


#1

This happened when I was in a club the other day. I was just chillin at the bar minding my own business when this obnoxious drunk fat girl started slobbering all over me, then her bf came over and accuses me of hitting on his mrs, now this guy was big, you could tell he did some serious weightlifting, must have had a good 100lbs on me and I just laughed and told him: "I wouldn't touch her with a barge pole, she's fat, you're ugly, i'm neither, I could pick up better looking chicks at a science fair, now get lost you meat head".

He didn't appreciate this and threw a left hook, I ducked, landed too kidney shots and when he turned around I caught him in a clinch landing three knees and an elbow, he looked dazed and was nursing his bloody nose, I was in a real bad mood earlier though so I took him with a single leg takedown and side mount, then proceeded to rain down one hammerfist after another. That let off all my steam and he was just laying there holding his face and I was just 'ha, where's your dbol now bitch?' and got the hell out of there before the bouncers got me (this all happened over the course of about 15 seconds).

And something similar has happened before, there was this arrogant bastard back in school, he was sprinter and considerably bigger than me, and kicked off with me once, but I wasn't in no mood to take shit from anyone so I just caught him with a scissor takedown and heel hook. He was lucky I didn't break his ankle. And when he was rolling around in agony I laughed when I realised his gf and lackey were watching

Man I know having muscle looks good, but what's the point if you're still going to get you ass handed to you buy a trained guy less than half your size.


#2

Once again, cool story brah.


#3


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#4

KILL HIM WITH FIRE!

QUICK, BEFORE HE STARTS ANOTHER THREAD!!


#5

Regarding your comment about hammerfists, about how many of those do you have to unleash to qualify the attack as a "rain"?

When I think of "rain", I think of an uncountable array of falling objects, too numerous to avoid. In ten seconds, I think no fewer than 200 hammerfists would pass for a "rain of hammerfists", at least not in my books.

Was it perhaps more of a sprinkling, a dash, or a light dusting of hammerfists?

Regardless, great story. Could have used a couple vampires and maybe a two-timing sorcerer though.


#6

There ... it hurt reading but I edited it down to the facts and took out all the stuff that only happened in your head ... you're welcome


#7

Clearly you are able to beat up anybody that's larger than you. This is more than obvious from your many encounters.

I suggest you start picking fights with everyone who is bigger than you, just to be on the safe side.


#8

was this club you were in...a fight club by chance?

cause i herd that you're not even supposed to talk about it


#9

Word Brah....you are so hard I bet all the chicks wanna hook up with you.....wait, is there a thread about that yet?


#10

Nice. You're going to get your ass beat by the next big guy tho. I've had bitches come do the same shit to me and their dudes will start shit. I walked away cuz I'm a bigger man. I'll let him look like a badass to his girl, not worth the fight to me. When you get your ass beat one good time you will understand why.


#11

You're like, amazing little dude. That sounds so totally cool. Where do you live so I can avoid you?

I mean, out of shear survival instinct.

When does your mom get home, DB?


#12

Ya know, I don't think ya did.


#13

wow you took excellent notes from todays article "On Matters of Douchebaggery"


#14

Daaaaamn, Yolked just got served up for this guys first post ... oh it's on!


#15

PLEASE.


#16


#17

So this guy must of been tippin the scales at 135 may be 140 LEAN! Damn thats badass


#18

That story is LaBuff.


#19


Bravo!

But seriously, Yolked, this coupon is for you.


#20

bullshit, i wanted that line.

cool story bro. doubt it happened.