T Nation

BDay Present for My Old Man

Need some help on this one. My dad is turning 58 in a couple weeks and I am having a hard time finding a gift. He is very wealthy so its kind of the situation where you have to ask ‘what do you get a guy that has everything’.

He loves like tech things and hinted he wants something ‘techy’ but doesn’t really have any one thing in mind when he says it. I also know if I go over the 200 mark in price he will be more upset than happy. Any suggestions? Was thinking one of those fit bit bracelets would be perfect but of course a day or so back Amazon Primes beats me to it so I am stuck here.

Google chromecast? Idk bro all I know is I’ve been seeing that shit a lot in the headlines lately.

what does he like to do? Does he have a tablet? Love my google nexus.

Christ…get him a pepperidge farm summer sausage…been doing this for my dad for b-day and xmas for 20 years and it always makes him happy…and don’t buy him a card…pisses my old man off to see someone spend 3 bucks on an effing card…don’t even wrap the effin’ sausage…just give it to him and say something nice like, “I was just thinking the other day about when you took me fishing down at that place near Hyattsville and we caught all that perch.” and then ask him some dopey question like “Where was that stream again?” Then he can talk for 5 minutes and you had like a real conversation and all is good until the next year.

[quote]Testy1 wrote:
what does he like to do? Does he have a tablet? Love my google nexus.[/quote]

He has 3 tablets… thats kind of the problem.

He likes scuba diving, has the most expensive dive watch and gear in the market.

Likes working out, built his own custom home gym that i’d use over my commercial gym.

Likes cars, Drives a 911 Carera S, has an entire detail kit and even an expensive towel dryer(yup…) for his special micro fiber towels.

Miami Heat fan, has just about everyone’s autograph already…

etc etc etc. If they guy was a super hero his name would be the Redundant Ranger or Captain Contingency plan. Even with his dive computer, he has like 2 back ups.

[quote]sen say wrote:
Christ…get him a pepperidge farm summer sausage…been doing this for my dad for b-day and xmas for 20 years and it always makes him happy…and don’t buy him a card…pisses my old man off to see someone spend 3 bucks on an effing card…don’t even wrap the effin’ sausage…just give it to him and say something nice like, “I was just thinking the other day about when you took me fishing down at that place near Hyattsville and we caught all that perch.” and then ask him some dopey question like “Where was that stream again?” Then he can talk for 5 minutes and you had like a real conversation and all is good until the next year.[/quote]

Wouldnt work. I actually see my old man multiple times a week so i cant just bank on nostalgia.

[quote]Waittz wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:
what does he like to do? Does he have a tablet? Love my google nexus.[/quote]

He has 3 tablets… thats kind of the problem.

He likes scuba diving, has the most expensive dive watch and gear in the market.

Likes working out, built his own custom home gym that i’d use over my commercial gym.

Likes cars, Drives a 911 Carera S, has an entire detail kit and even an expensive towel dryer(yup…) for his special micro fiber towels.

Miami Heat fan, has just about everyone’s autograph already…

etc etc etc. If they guy was a super hero his name would be the Redundant Ranger or Captain Contingency plan. Even with his dive computer, he has like 2 back ups.[/quote]

Break his cellphone and go for a hike together.


give him a beer and let him see something nekkid

[quote]The Greek wrote:
Google chromecast? Idk bro all I know is I’ve been seeing that shit a lot in the headlines lately. [/quote]

It’s $35 and a pretty nice piece of tech that was just released, so there’s a good chance he doesn’t have it. Pair it with a google play/apple store (which ever camp he rides with) giftcard. That may make for a decent gift and would be easy to keep you under the two hundred mark.

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[quote]sen say Sr. wrote:
Christ… whatever you do don’t get him a damn pepperidge farm summer sausage…my son’s been doing this for my b-day and xmas for 20 years and I always pretend I like it…he doesn’t even bother to wrap the effin’ sausage…just gives it to me and says something stupid like, “I was just thinking the other day about when you took me fishing down at that place near Hyattsville and we caught all that perch.” and then asks me some dopey question like “Where was that stream again?” Then he expects me to talk for 5 minutes pretending we had a real conversation like all is supposed to be good until the next year.[/quote]

[quote]super saiyan wrote:

[quote]sen say Sr. wrote:
Christ… whatever you do don’t get him a damn pepperidge farm summer sausage…my son’s been doing this for my b-day and xmas for 20 years and I always pretend I like it…he doesn’t even bother to wrap the effin’ sausage…just gives it to me and says something stupid like, “I was just thinking the other day about when you took me fishing down at that place near Hyattsville and we caught all that perch.” and then asks me some dopey question like “Where was that stream again?” Then he expects me to talk for 5 minutes pretending we had a real conversation like all is supposed to be good until the next year.[/quote]
[/quote]

comedic gold. See how it’s done Sen?

[quote]pushharder wrote:
A massage especially one with a happy ending is always a good gift.[/quote]
Yea or fucking hookers and blow

unless he is married then skip the blow

[quote]pushharder wrote:
A massage especially one with a happy ending is always a good gift.[/quote]

How would someone go about arranging the happy ending portion of the massage? Just offer them a larger tip?

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[quote]Testy1 wrote:

comedic gold. See how it’s done Sen?[/quote]

bah…I didn’t even see he doctored it…just thought his silly picture most likely of Nick Cage didn’t show up…to be honest, this is NOT his best work…we were doing this back in ought eight…it’s the ol’ reverse the definitive object perspective, or as they say in France Le Plus De Revere…anyway…NEXT!

[quote]The Greek wrote:
How would someone go about arranging the happy ending portion of the massage? Just offer them a larger tip? [/quote]

FFS…if the masseuse isn’t willing to finish the job simply man up and stroke daddy into tremoring waves of bliss yourself while singing Happy Birthday really, really loud…

[quote]Waittz wrote:
Need some help on this one. My dad is turning 58 in a couple weeks and I am having a hard time finding a gift. He is very wealthy so its kind of the situation where you have to ask ‘what do you get a guy that has everything’.

He loves like tech things and hinted he wants something ‘techy’ but doesn’t really have any one thing in mind when he says it. I also know if I go over the 200 mark in price he will be more upset than happy. Any suggestions? Was thinking one of those fit bit bracelets would be perfect but of course a day or so back Amazon Primes beats me to it so I am stuck here. [/quote]

Take him to a place like Twin Peaks…get a picture of him using the toilet. Frame the picture and give it to him for Christmas. Kill two birds with one stone.

Get him a nice bottle of Bourbon.