Bar Fights

[quote]VinceDee wrote:
You guys are all tools.

I prefer being a lover to a fighter.[/quote]

And there we have it folks. The first pussy post of the thread.

Great job man.

[quote]wufwugy wrote:
never been in a bar fight, but i almost beat up a rottweiler the other day. damn bastard didn’t wanna jump his fence though. it was like three feet high! he coulda done it…[/quote]

Just picturing the face off between you and the dog…I’m still laughing.

[quote]VinceDee wrote:
You guys are all tools.

I prefer being a lover to a fighter.[/quote]

Fighting has got a bad rap. Mostly because the “tools” can’t take a loss and come back after you. I remember when there wasn’t anything wrong with a good scrap.

The Sicilian,

That guy must not have ever seen The Godfather. He is lucky he is not sleeping with the fishes.

I thought that after you finish giving him the Sonny Corleone ass whoopin, Uncle Paulie is supposed to pull the car around and ‘give him a ride home’

On another note, its too bad mls jr. got booted, I’m sure he’s got some great ragdolling stories for this thread.

I havent been in a bar fight per se, but the dog story brought up an old one from high school. I was a big time cross country runner, and my senior year had finally put a little meat on my bones and was about 170 at 6’0. We were on this run and this dog came out of nowhere and started chasing us.

Now I have a very fast high gear, so in a couple steps I was up to full sprint and the dog had no chance of catching me, but one of our best runners, is kinda like a real skinny kenyan type kid with no top speed. So the dog is like nipping at his heels and actually gets a small nip in on his ass and the kid lets out a cry like he is being eaten to death. Well anyways, I said fuck it, turned around and sprinted full speed and just drove my knee right at this dogs head. I went down and so did the dog and thankfully I hit him hard enough to send him whimpering back to the house he came from. Bastard never chased us again.

V

About 20 years ago me and some buds go to a strip bar in Windsor and get fairly looped.

As we are going from one bar to another, some asshole in the street starts giving my buddy a hard time for no reason. Now my friend has never been in a fight and doesn’t intend to start.

I respond and the guy squares off like it’s queens-bury rules. Two right jabs and a left cross and the guy is sitting on his ass. I figure it’s over, lets go continue with our evening.

About two blocks later, I hear “look out”, and I turn just in time to get clocked. Now I’m sitting on my ass, and this guy is punching me on the top of the head. Well I’m drunk and have a thick German skull, so i’m not feeling a thing.

However, I can’t allow him to stand over me as he is interfering with my evening. So I reach up and grab him by the sack in a pinch grip. To get an idea of how uncomfortable this is grab the inside of your forearm between thumb and forefinger and squeeze as hard as you can.

Just then a cop comes along and tells this guy to leave me alone. All the guy can do is croak " he’s got me by the balls". The cop tells him two more times, each time with the same response. I finally let go and he slithered away. I figure that’s that let’s continue on.

Well it’s is decided maybe it is time to go home, so we head for the car. As we get to the lot, who’s there but my new friend sitting in his car. He starts screaming he’s going to kick my ass, flings open his car door and swings his legs out. I body slam the door, he let’s out a scream and we call it a night.

Just remember, I didn’t start any of this shit but it sure was fun.

On a separate note, I saw a guy get killed at a beer tent over nothing. One punch and he fell back and hit his head on a curb, game over.

I’ll do all I can to avoid fighting now.

That was beautiful.

[quote]Vegita wrote:
Well anyways, I said fuck it, turned around and sprinted full speed and just drove my knee right at this dogs head. I went down and so did the dog and thankfully I hit him hard enough to send him whimpering back to the house he came from. Bastard never chased us again.

V[/quote]

The last bar fight I had was when I was bouncing, me being 5’9" 190 lbs and the drunk being 6’0" 220 or so. Anyways, he is flailing around like a little girl and clips my lip. I was calm but I thought to myself, “Oh, hell no!” and having studied martial arts for years I was just about to side kick this fool in the face, (not because its the best or smartest move, only that it would have worked in this situation) then I discovered my pants were too tight.

So instead, I drove in, grabbed his head and kneed him in the face, switched to a headlock and just dropped to the floor where he promptly lay until we cuffed him and took him out. Now this may not seem like much, but I wondered later, how he felt to be a guy in his early 20’s, just get his ass handed to him by someone about twice his age. Im 45

then I discovered my pants were too tight.

That’ll teach you to get rid of those stone washed jeans. j/k

vegita beat up a dog. lucky schucks.

[quote]rainjack wrote:

And there we have it folks. The first pussy post of the thread.

Great job man.[/quote]

I got laid this morning, and will likely get some later. Go count some carbs or something tough guy.

[quote]TheSicilian wrote:
then I discovered my pants were too tight.

That’ll teach you to get rid of those stone washed jeans. j/k
[/quote]

They were probably pegged too.

This story was told to me by a friend.

My friend is in a bar with some of his college buddies (I don’t know them) and one goes out to make a phone call. This kid, “John,” is 6’1 and about 210. So John’s gone for a while and the rest of them begin to get a bit uneasy. Just as they’re about to go out, John walks in. White as a ghost.
“Holy shit man, what happened.”
“Some guy just pulled a knife on me and told me to give him his wallet.”
“Did you?”
“No”
“Where is he, let’s kill him”
“He’s outside”

So they go outside and they see a kid knocked out on the floor with a switchblade in his hand.

John only had $17 in his wallet, too.

I’m not sure how I feel about him leaving the switchblade there, but it’s certainly an intersting story.

[quote]VinceDee wrote:

I got laid this morning, and will likely get some later. Go count some carbs or something tough guy.

[/quote]

“A superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions” - Confucius

[quote]VinceDee wrote:
rainjack wrote:

And there we have it folks. The first pussy post of the thread.

Great job man.

I got laid this morning, and will likely get some later. Go count some carbs or something tough guy.

[/quote]

yeah, but why were you alone at the time?

if you get into a fight then you can’t get laid? dangit.

There’s nothin greater than standing back to back with some buddies and throwin down. There’s also nothin scarier than bein alone and gettin stomped out by 10-15 people. I’ve been through both. Today, I choose my battles a little more wisely. And thankfully, people look at me differently at 200 lbs. than the way they did when I was at 160. I could tell a bunch of experiences but I’ll stick to the most recent…

About a month ago, I had no other choice but to get in one of these brawls. Members of a local college’s rugby team decided they would pop off at the mouth to one of my boys. I heard this and 3 of my other friends also came around to see what the problem was. They already had us outnumbered 8-5. The pussies all get on cell phones and start callin their boys up. We stand our ground and eventually, altogether about 14 of them are in our faces talkin shit. I’m trying to diffuse the situation but it doesn’t work. One of the guys slaps the hand of the guy they first started talkin shit to.

Big mistake! Huge right hand sent that guy out for the entire fight. His buddies jump in so me and my friends have no other choice but to get dirty. I guess they were all shook after they saw the aftermath of the first punch. Anyhow, 14 on 5, we leave with only 2 black eyes and 2 of them leave in an ambulance. You do the math.

[quote]VinceDee wrote:
rainjack wrote:

And there we have it folks. The first pussy post of the thread.

Great job man.

I got laid this morning, and will likely get some later. Go count some carbs or something tough guy.
[/quote]

You don’t get it - do you? This thread is about fighting, not fucking. Your post was an estro-filled manorexic plea for peace.

Once again - great job.

[quote]rainjack wrote:
VinceDee wrote:
rainjack wrote:

And there we have it folks. The first pussy post of the thread.

Great job man.

I got laid this morning, and will likely get some later. Go count some carbs or something tough guy.

You don’t get it - do you? This thread is about fighting, not fucking. Your post was an estro-filled manorexic plea for peace.

Once again - great job.
[/quote]

estro filled…wow.
RJ…you forgot to ask if he was eating soy!

All I can think of now is an old Star Trek NG episode where Riker gets the power of Q and creates a Klingon female for Worf and he hits her and knocks her ass across the bridge–they say something about having created her for sex and Worf says “for a Klingon…this is sex…”

joe, as much as i like star trek and shatner and stewart i haven’t seen too many episodes, but you just reminded me of one i have seen. that part was hilarious!