Well, as to your first question, check out the thread in the T-Cell Alpha on back training. There's a lot of good stuff in there as far as tips go that we have all found work for us from experience. Some of them may disagree, but all of those ideas are tested in real life.
Also, if you need to bring up your back, you need to work it a)harder and b) more often in a week. People don't generally do either, with every monday, wednesday, and friday being International Bench and Bicep days.
And finally, as far as squatting goes: suck it up. Really. That's what I did when I was a newb, along with thousands of people before me. It is uncomfortable, that is just the way it is. Also, you don't have any back musculature. The more meat you have on your back, the more comfortable the bar sits. Right now the bar and me are best friends; it sits just fine back there.