T Nation

Aww What The Hell, 2 Years Progress

So I’ve been lifting for almost 2 years now. And I just took a progress pic.

 I look like shit, I look far worse than I feel like i do in the mirror. Argg I'm so bummed out now. It feels like I've been giving it 100% in the gym and eating great on top, but I just end up looking pale and soft and unimpressively muscular. Lifting weights is like my friggen life, this is a huge blow to me. It feels like everything I did was a waste of time. fuck. I use the excuse that I'm bulking, but I'm only gaining maybe 2lbs a month, and I'm sure as fuck not losing fat. I never would have thought the day would come but T-Nation... I feel fucking fat.

I need to gain 30 - 40lbs, fix my trap imbalance (glare on pictur ein background makes it look way worse than it really is), and get some really god damn strength. But I’ve hit a wall. I dont know what to do. What I’ve been doing is obviously not working

adjust and start again.

I’ve been training nearly two years, and can’t press my bodyweight. I still haven’t figured out “what works” for me training wise, but I will.

We all get stuck or question our goals at some point, the bigger issue is that we push through and prevail.

[/end corny inspiration]

This is before I started lifting

I don’t know, It’s just a big downer now. Im not sure if I should start hitting up cardio or just bulk on ahead

I was doing olympic lifting for a while and having a blast, then i smashed a ligament in my wrist and couldn’t press for 4 months, and it seems to have just fucked everything up

It’s probably just the picture, but you’ve got a noticable taper.

No leg flare though.

Post up diet and training. And supp. Maybe we can help.

back pic

My diet is okay i guess, I dont eat the same meal every day, but I get 6 meals a day, get about 40g protein per meal, and taper cabs etc etc, all from healthy sources. lots of eggs, steak, tuna, whey, egg whites. for example today i had:

  1. double lean burger on whole wheat bun, apple

  2. 500ml egg whites 2 scoops dextrose PWO

  3. 4 whole eggs, 2 slices 12 grain with natty pb

  4. Slow cooker meal of red potatos, vegetables, and a roast

  5. 8oz steak, 1 cup pineapple, spinach salad

  6. 4 whole eggs, 1 tin tuna, olive oil,

I don’t know how many calories that is, this is probably where I’m failing.

I take 5 fish oil caps that are 400/200mg epa/dha per meal, so thats about 9g epa and 5g dha a day.

2-3 times a day ill have a tbsp apple cider vinegar before a meal

I take 5g creatine mono per day, and a multi.

As you can see in my back pic, the right trap is bigger and that shoulder is higher up… I don’t know how to fix this. I think its from when i was trying to train through my wrist injury, so my left wrist would hold the bar all wrapped up and without wrist extension, and the right one would be normal, and be an inch or two lower, so the trap has to compensate to keep the bar even.

I just finished about 6 weeks of pretty much a rippetoes style program, with a lower, push, and pull heavy compound 5rm each day 3x a week. this is what im currently doing, I made it up. please feel free to tear it apart

Benchpress - up to a heavy triple
Incline Press - 3x5
Dips - 3x6-8
Lateral Raises - 3 - 4 sets of whatever, try to progress

I still cant do overhead pressing due to my wrist, and my pressing strength is crap compared to everything else, currently at 205x5

Deadlift - up to a heavy triple
Front Squat - 3x5
Unilateral - 3x6-8 (doing db split squats, right leg way weaker)
Decline Crunch - 2x10-15 (25lb plate behind my head)

Wed - off/arms w barbell at home, i never trained arms till recently, they are lagging, especially my high biceps.

Calves - 5 - 6 working sets seated/standing whatever
1000m row warm up
Chinups - up to a heavy triple (currently @ BW+60lbs x3)
DB row - 5,5,kroc style, 5 no straps, using heaviest db in gym…95lbs… current record is 15 reps
Pullovers/something… i dunno what to do after rows

Facepulls, YTWLs, Rotator cuff shit etc.

thursday is my random sort of day. perhaps i should turn it into another benching type day?

Back Squat: up to a heavy triple, Olympic style
Good Mornings: 3x5
RDLs: 3x6-8
Decline Crunch: 2x10-15, same as tuesday.

on the weekends i’ve started messing aroung with a sledgehammer doing levers and pronations etc.

BW: 180lbs ± 3lbs
height: 5’10

Bench: 225ish probably. all hopped up and raged out
Squat: 300/310 maybe
Deadlift: 380.

i want to get a 255 bench, 335 squat, and 405 deadlift as short term goals.

physique goals, maybe get to a lean 190. i cannot afford more clothes.

sorry heres a quad.

Come on! Not that bad. Sure you aren’t done yet (actually we’ll never be) but you achieved some good progress. What did you expect to achieve in 2 years only? Also don’t forget your starting point was pretty low!

your starting point you must have been like 120 lbs, and now your 180… you really shouldn’t feel bad.

still, it can be hard when you haven’t made progress in awhile.

try Christian T’s “mirror workout”, or beast building program.

honestly your workout seems pretty haphazard to me.

It doesn’t look nearly as much like a larger trap as it does scapular displacement. It’s prety common and there is a ton of stuff in the archives about how to stabilize the scapulae.

Maybe run it by Robertson or Cressey in a locker room thread of theirs.

your being too hard on yourself you are doing alright.

keep at it your fine dude.

my opinion is to use today as a new starting point and go from switch it up.
but stop nit picking though for real your making good progress.

Get a tan. It’ll help.

[quote]nichaaron wrote:
your being too hard on yourself you are doing alright.

keep at it your fine dude.

my opinion is to use today as a new starting point and go from switch it up.
but stop nit picking though for real your making good progress.

Agreed completely.

You’re physique looks exactly like mine. You’re starting point was the same as mine too.

You’ve definitely made some decent gains. I think you’re being too hard on yourself. We’re our own worst critics after all.

If you want to improve there’s nothing much to it, just try a new program and experiment. But you already knew that.

I think for two years your doing quite well mate, definatly a big improvement on your starting point. If your feeling down, just change it up a bit. New routines, lift at different times. Try stuff you normally wouldnt try.

Here’s a comparison. I might still be a newb, but it looks to me like you’ve made some excellent progress over the last two years. Don’t sell yourself short, man.

You’ve made decent progess. If you got everything handed to you it wouldn’t be any fun at all. It doesn’t really matter if you’re not looking as good as you wish you were, because you’re progressing and getting better - and that’s what it’s all about. Now adjust your plan a litte and keep up the good work man!

Good job thus far, be patient and stay natural!

I know its hard to judge yourself because you always see it differently than an external point of view.

simply put you were a boy in the old pic and a man in the second.

whilst some people start out like the pic on the right, you have to gain perspective and see that you have really made huge gains and have completely changed your body type.

take home messages:

  1. you are not fat, not even remotely. I know that the vast majority of average people would kill for simply not having to lean over to see their genitals.

  2. you shouldnt care about becoming fat. I guarentee you that if you want a pound of weight extra a week, half of that will be fat. save yourself a lot of time now and eat MORE not less.

  3. in the same post that you complained about your lack of progress you explained that you dont know how much you are eating, which as you acknowledged is most likely your problem.

go read massive eating by Berardi, even if you have already, and follow his instructions to get yourself back on track.

you probably know all this anyway, but I think you are after a kick in the ass to tell you you have made big progress, and will continue to make big progress if you quit moping about how ‘fat’ you are.