T Nation

Assault Outside of Work

Hello all,

Looking for some info & advice regarding my situation.

I work abroad for a construction company. Long story short I assaulted my work colleague (who is also my house mate) outside of work hours in our company provided apartment. The guy has been strongly provoking me with several sneaky behind the back tactics for months. He has also falsly reported me to HR behind my back. I had enough of his antics & punched him in the face 3 times.

Following the incident I had an interview with HR. They stated that the matter was “very serious” & that I would be informed of diciplinary action within 3 days.
What can I expect at this next meeting? Can I expect to be fired?

This happened outside of work hours & I understand that the company cannot fire you because of this, however I am concerned that it occured in a company rented apartment. Will this have any influence on the decision?
Secondly the guy is a rat & this is not an unprovoked attack. I have bitten my tongue & not punched this guy on several occassions.
Thirdly, this is a first time offense, I have had no problems up until now.

Any suggestions or info that I can arm myself with going into this second meeting will be much appreciated.

Thanks guys.

If I punch a co-worker in a Vegas strip club while he was making it rain on a peg-leg stripper’s ass does a tree make a sound?

You admit to hitting a coworker out of anger not defense. Who gave you the idea that this alone will not get you fired. No matter where it happened.

I’m sure he deserved it. Some people just need to be punched in the face. But there will almost always be consequences. Are they worth it?

It doesn’t look good on your behalf.

This occurred on company property.
You filed no reports or counter-reports with HR against this guy.

The only thing that may help is if you had witnesses on your behalf. Even then, it may not be enough, as it would have been expected that you file a complaint BEFORE you reacted in violence.

Good luck. You’re going to need it.

(Interesting… your screen name MAY reflect something…)

Yeah, I agree with four60. You are probably going to get fired. In the adult world, you can’t hit people who piss you off. Even if he is provoking you with “behind the back tactics.” You are lucky he didn’t call the police. What is your visa status? Depending on which country you are in and the specifics of your visa, you may also be looking at going home.

My advice:
-be ready for a firing and possible revocation of visa.
-figure out why you couldn’t/can’t control your anger and fix that problem before you end up in jail.

You can expect to be unemployed very, very soon. You can also expect to have charges pressed against you if your roommate is a litigious person.

What else would you expect? Do you really need a fucking thread for this? You acted like a goddamned child and now it’s time to pay the consequences. This “construction” company will be better off for having fired your dumb fucking ass.

[quote]four60 wrote:

You admit to hitting a coworker out of anger not defense. Who gave you the idea that this alone will not get you fired. No matter where it happened.[/quote]

This. You can absolutely be fired for your conduct outside of work, especially if it’s criminal. As a society we have generally decided that it’s not OK to punch people because we are pissed off at them. This may be very inconvenient at times, but it’s the way it is. You will be fortunate if you ONLY get fired and don’t end up on the wrong end of charges and/or civil action. As someone else mentioned, if the police get involved you will very likely get your visas yanked and your ass shipped home (possibly on your dime). The company may or may not want to keep it in house in order to avoid making waves with local LE, depends on their attitude. It may not go that way, but it’s definitely possible if not likely.

As you have already had your hearing with HR and are just waiting on the outcome, I suppose there’s not much you can do to mitigate the damage now. However, for your sake, I hope you at genuinely acknowledged the seriousness of the incident and your own responsibility and showed contrition. It would have been good if you offered willingly to involve yourself in proactive solutions to avoid similar issues in the future (possibly anger management etc). Although, given your use of quotations around “very serious” and your heavy emphasis on the other guy’s guilt for “provoking” you in the first place, I’m not sure how likely this is.

If you take nothing else away from this, I hope you learned that he who angers you controls and ultimately conquers you. You said this guy had it in for you (reporting you falsely to HR etc). You lost you shit, punched this guy out and so gave him exactly what he wanted. You punched him 3 times which likely hurt him and gave you a sense of satisfaction in the moment. He then went to HR, now with a legitimate complaint which will likely get you fired from what I assume is a well paying job. It may even effect your future employment prospects within your industry, especially if you end up with a criminal record. So, I ask you, who won? Even if you keep your job this time, the principle still applies. When you lose control of your emotions you lose, period, even if you’re “right”. Very few adult problems can be solved with your fists. I don’t mean to be a condescending ass, it’s just a fact of life.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:
You can expect to be unemployed very, very soon. You can also expect to have charges pressed against you if your roommate is a litigious person.

What else would you expect? Do you really need a fucking thread for this? You acted like a goddamned child and now it’s time to pay the consequences. This “construction” company will be better off for having fired your dumb fucking ass.[/quote]

Wow, when DB’s that much more concise than you it’s time to shorten your posts the f up…
Sorry.

[quote]Mr.Nasty wrote:

Long story short I assaulted my work colleague (who is also my house mate) outside of work hours in our company provided apartment. The guy has been strongly provoking me with several sneaky behind the back tactics for months. He has also falsly reported me to HR behind my back. I had enough of his antics & punched him in the face 3 times.

[/quote]

Looks like he was trying to provoke you and it worked. What did he previously report you for? If you were aware of that you should’ve known that punching him would’ve just added credence to previous complaints about you.

To add another log to the fire here, once you’ve reached adulthood, there are almost always ramifications for punching someone in the face.

It’s usually best not to punch people.

On the job front, you are pretty much fucked.

[quote]Mr.Nasty wrote:

Any suggestions or info that I can arm myself with going into this second meeting will be much appreciated.

Thanks guys.[/quote]

If you’ve been with the company for less than 10 years I suspect you’ll be fired. If you’re with a union or a lifer you might be have a chance.

You punched someone in the face, a co-worker no less. There is no way you can justify this, don’t even try to. You’re best bet is to admit guilt, say you’re sorry, promise it will never happen again, etc.

I appreciate the responses. Yes it looks like I’m fucked, what can ya do.
I did contact HR previously about him, so that may help somewhat. He also admitted to some, but not all of the previous incidents.
What he did to cause me to hit him: I work in a very hot country where air con is vital. The dial which controls the air con in both bedrooms is located in his room. He turned the air con up to the maximum setting & locked his door before going on holidays, which resulted in my room being like a sauna for a week & me getting no sleep. I also just had surgery for varicose veins 3 weeks prior to this. This incident I feel did not help the recovery. He has done this several times & this time I had enough. This has overall caused me a great deal of stress & anger.
Anyway I’m not optimistic about the outcome even though he 100% deserved the ass whooping he got. At least I’m not in jail!

I do not want to admit guilt in this situation, yes I punched him & I have admitted to that, however he tormented me for several months, what about his punishment? Morally I have done nothing wrong.
I also requested a transfer to another location to avoid the prick, this request was completely ignored by HR, I only got a response after I called them several times & was basically shut down.
I requested assistance from HR to open his door & access the dial the first time he did this, this was also turned down in a cheeky email, which pissed me off greatly. Overall I DID request assistance with dealing with this sack of shit… several times. I think I will bring this up & turn the blame on them. Maybe attack could be the best form of defence.

YOU GOIN TO JAIL NOW
YOU GOIN TO JAIL NOW

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
YOU GOIN TO JAIL NOW
YOU GOIN TO JAIL NOW[/quote]

isn’t that what the bus driver said before he uppercut that girl? lol

I feel for you man. I’ve worked with some absolute fuckwits before and it caused a great deal of stress to not kick the fuck out of them. It sounds like HR only aggravated the situation with their responses to you. Lawsuit maybe? People have sued for less, I guess.

Sadly though, we have to take responsibility for our actions, hopefully you can get a good reference from the company and find a new job

[quote]Mr.Nasty wrote:
I do not want to admit guilt in this situation, yes I punched him & I have admitted to that, however he tormented me for several months, what about his punishment? Morally I have done nothing wrong.
I also requested a transfer to another location to avoid the prick, this request was completely ignored by HR, I only got a response after I called them several times & was basically shut down.
I requested assistance from HR to open his door & access the dial the first time he did this, this was also turned down in a cheeky email, which pissed me off greatly. Overall I DID request assistance with dealing with this sack of shit… several times. I think I will bring this up & turn the blame on them. Maybe attack could be the best form of defence.[/quote]

All good points but when you articulate that to HR make sure you don’t come off as a whiny kid who “just snapped”.

If this job is very important to you, get yourself an attorney and stop posting about this on T-Nation!

[quote]Cortes wrote:
If this job is very important to you, get yourself an attorney and stop posting about this on T-Nation![/quote]

I’m surprised it took this long for this to get stated.

You should be showing up to your next meeting with your attorney. Even if your next meeting is Monday morning at 7am.

[quote]Mr.Nasty wrote:
I appreciate the responses. Yes it looks like I’m fucked, what can ya do.
I did contact HR previously about him, so that may help somewhat. He also admitted to some, but not all of the previous incidents.
What he did to cause me to hit him: I work in a very hot country where air con is vital. The dial which controls the air con in both bedrooms is located in his room. He turned the air con up to the maximum setting & locked his door before going on holidays, which resulted in my room being like a sauna for a week & me getting no sleep. I also just had surgery for varicose veins 3 weeks prior to this. This incident I feel did not help the recovery. He has done this several times & this time I had enough. This has overall caused me a great deal of stress & anger.
Anyway I’m not optimistic about the outcome even though he 100% deserved the ass whooping he got. At least I’m not in jail! [/quote]

Why didn’t you break open the door and adjust that AC yourself?

Yes hindsight is 20-20 but suffering through multiple, sleepless nights and letting this fester makes almost zero sense.

edit - Ok, I see you did contact HR about this (?) and nothing was accomplished. Perhaps you’re better off at a new company anyway. Best of luck with this, and going fwd.