T Nation

Asking for a spot..

Just wanted to know how people really felt when someone asks them to spot them for a set…

I try and get the most out of every work out but am timid when it comes to upping my lifts… for e.g. bench press… I have some fear that I’ll suddenly hit failure and drop the bar on myself… I haven’t yet and that’s because I don’t push myself to failure on these types of excercises… I would like to ask for a spot but am respectful of everyone else’s time in the gym and aware that everyone has their own set time for breaks etc… So c’mon spill it… is it annoying when a girl asks you to spot her?

Thanks people…
Chess…

“…is it annoying when a girl asks you to spot her?”

No. No, no no no… it is NOT annoying when a woman asks me to spot her. It’s all part of being a gentleman, as well as taking the time to get to know the people that workout around you (ie. diets, exercises etc.)

I’m not saying this is a time to be social. I value my gym time, too. At the same token, I’d appreciate a spot when I need one if I trained alone that day. I wouldn’t be asking a woman though :slight_smile:

…or would I…

Well Chessie…

I happen to know for a fact that many men enjoy spotting for women. It allows them the opportunity to “Lay Jacket” in the great training boulevard of life’s puddles.

That and Timmy P insists on going commando whilst wearing his loose-fitting soccer style Addidas so a spot on the Bench earns him many comments to feed his ego.

Like…

“Oh, look…Grapes!”

“I didn’t think you could braid that?”

and of course…

“Um…you are a man, right?”

That Timmy, what a guy!

(I would also ask that the Nation insert their own Timmy P/James Brown-mug shot joke here…I tried and I know that it is out there somewhere but…)

“Sometimes you struggle so hard to feed your family one way, you forget to feed them the other way, with spiritual nourishment. Everybody needs that”

~ James Brown

(Yeah James…a steady diet of lefts and rights does a body good!)

Considering how intimidated I used to be when I first started working out in a gym, I can understand someones hesitancy to ask for one. If somebody is nice and polite about it I have no problem offering a few seconds to spot another in the gym. My t-shirt says, “Im not here to talk” NOT “I’m not here to spot”. If they are there to really train, they’ll understand the difference.

I never think it’s annoying when anyone asks me to spot them provided:

a) They don’t do it in the middle of my set

b) They don’t plan on doing a set of 12 negatives (1 or 2 is fine but I’m not there to do your workout)

c) They ask for a spot on lifts that need them (one more person asks for a spot on bicep curls and I’ll snap) such as squats, bench, military press, d-bell press etc

STU

Sturat… you’re right in relation to them not doing the workout for me and it’s usually only the last few reps that I need motivationary tools (not grapes… 'Cake… I’ll deal with you later my boy and yes the goat will be there too!!)

Sorry… I digress…

So do I ask someone to spot me for the whole set?? Your answer just confuses me a little… Are you saying that I should ask for them to walk on over when they see I’m struggling?? If I’m gonna add a decent weight to a bench press and bust my butt trying to push out 8 or 10 I think I’d want someone there the whole time?

But I do get that it’s ok to ask… I’ll try it out… It’s still a little embarrasing for some reason…

Thanks guys…
Chess…

I always ask if I need one and will always give one if requested. I’ve tried this same philosophy on women and oral sex but it hasn’t work out to good for me.

But seriously, I consider it kind of a goodwill, brotherhood type thing.

BEdZ… I can see how… ‘hey luv, will you come over here and blow me’ can be the same as ‘hey luv, will you come over here and spot me’… maybe the girls you ask are afraid of the weight your asking them to blow… err… I mean spot… lol!!

I don’t mind asking and don’t mind giving. If I see someone struggling that actually looks like they are on their last rep or two and may need some help I may catch 'em for that last rep or two w/o them asking. Just to push 'em through that barrier and help ‘em grow that little extra bit.
If I do ask for a spot I look for the biggest guy there that I see most every time I’m there. If I don’t see anyone that makes me feel confident in their ability I just don’t ask.
BTW, I have never had a woman ask me for a spot. My gym is very hardcore and not the typical “meat market family fitness center”. Probably 80-90% males who either compete in bodybuilding or powerlifting.
But hey, I can get you a free week pass if ya’ want;)

My gym has “trainers” available in the gym at all times…sometimes I ask them, and have spotted for them several times when they are working out. Everyone is very friendly and I would never hesitate to ask someone I at least recognize.

You can always do your benching in the power rack with the safety bars set at the right height…of course only if nobody is actually using it for other things.

Muslhed…

I am sure that if Chester here asked you to spot her you would be thrilled.

You of course would then feel obliged to follow her home, wash her Bijon-Schitzu, sort her laundry colors and organize her recycling.

Fresh Linoleum and roofing would surely follow.

Geez, I hate that about sexy chicks and I sure am tired of washing dogs.

“From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it was hell, sheer hell, waiting to do something about it”

~ Bette Davis

I used to be the biggest spot at my gym. Then I dropped 30 lbs (fat, of course), and nobody trusts me anymore
:frowning:

Aside from benching, how many spots do people need? Aside from benching, I can’t imagine any other exercise that requires a spot save for max effort squat work. And as a generalization gym-goers bench too much as it is.

[quote]So do I ask someone to spot me for the whole set?? Your answer just confuses me a little… Are you saying that I should ask for them to walk on over when they see I’m struggling?? If I’m gonna add a decent weight to a bench press and bust my butt trying to push out 8 or 10 I think I’d want someone there the whole time?
[/quote]

Sorry, didn’t mean to confuse you. You should of course have the spotter there through the whole set as you indicated.

I just meant that I don’t mind helping people do one or two negatives at the end of the set, I just hate it when people come up and ask for a spot and assume that I’m willing to bent over row their bench for 12 or 15 reps. I’m of course standing there and ready the whole time I just don’t appreciate being used to bolster someone’s ego because they can’t bring themselves to take some weight off the bar.

STU

I am actually suprised that a woman would ask for a spot.

Most of them rightfully think well try toget a viewin the process. I dont know why. ;0)

I love it when some fuck wants me to spot him on bench and then I have to partial rack pulls with his bench weight.

I fixed that…I let motherfuckers strugle and die with that shit. Then as I pick it up and rack it, I say…

“it was all you man.” They usually never have me spot them again.

What’s the point of lifting weight you and I both know you can’t lift?

I would say only ask for a spot from someone doing the same exercise/using the same type equipment as you. I personally hate it when I’m doing squats and some guy walks all the way across the gym to get me to spot him on bench. Women shouldn’t worry about asking for a spot, doods will be lined up to do it. I rarely ask for a spot, not because of pride or concern over another’s time, its becuase 75% of these people don’t know how to do it properly.

Hi Chess

Most people will gladly give you a spot. Just time your approach and don’t keep going back exercise after exercise.

From experience, it is also a good idea to spell out what you expect from a spot. Some people see your bench press as an opportunity to train their traps. This is the hardest part, most people think they know how to spot. I’m sure you can be diplomatic.

Hi Chess

Most people will be happy to give you a spot. Just time your approach and don’t keep going back time after time.

From my experience it is also worth spelling out exactly what you want from the spot. Some people see your bench press as an opportunity to train their traps. This bit can be difficult because most people think they know what they are doing. I’m sure you can be diplomatic

I help anybody who asks. I also am unashmed to ask.