T Nation

As Seen on TV -- Bun and Thigh Master

I was waiting for my computer to turn on this morning so I watched a little TV. It was an infomercial about the Bun and Thigh master. They said in only 5 minutes a day I would be “on my way to better buns and thighs.” Then of course beautiful models were exercising with it.

I get sick of this deceptive quick buck advertising. If it really took 5 minutes a day, everybody would be buff. Then the way the marketers cleverly word their ad, they can’t get sued. They only offer testimonials or paid endorsements. I wish the same watch dogs who are on a witch hunt for the prohormones would be on a witch hunt for pieces of shit exercise equipment.

You’ve heard cortislim, “it’s not your fault your overweight.” Bullshit! Who had the gun to your head and made you eat a plate of brownies?

To me the slick fitness commericials get to me. I wish the government would go after, the gazelle watchamacallit with that annoying guy selling it.

I think they should do a mock infomercial called the “invisible trainer.” You know show people doing 30 minutes a day of push ups, sit ups, bench dips, jump rope, jumping jacks, sprints, pull ups, etc.,

The ad could go like this.

In stores now, the Invisible trainer, it guides you effortlessly through an effortless workout. See how the Invisible Trainer helps you with push ups, sit ups, crunches, etc.,

Anyhow, I’m fed up with it. But for only 3 easy payments of 39.95 I’ll send you your personal Invisible Trainer. Complete with exercise guide. But wait, PM me within the next 24 hours and I’ll send you 2, that’s right, 2 Invisible Trainers for the price of one. What an incredible value. Don’t delay, PM me now!

Can I put those invisible trainers on my expired credit card?