This response is so overdue, it’s essentially inconsequential. And maybe that’s why I decided to make it.
One gets to a point in life where you start retracing the past, and what seemed so long ago that it no longer matters is viewed as a chapter in the overall story. And my short stint with T Nation (Then, “Testosterone Magazine” ) is a part of it – though I’m not sure there will be too many people who would remember way back when. In fact, it’s safe to assume that some of the current readers weren’t yet born. (Yikes!)
This little venture was spurred by a random occurrence. I came across a message board where there was some discussion about me. It too was from several years ago and therefore seemingly not worth addressing. But it got me thinking.
I think, therefore I write.
So here goes. For anyone who cares.
Without getting too much into detail I will say that much of what has been said and written is simply untrue. That’s not a defense. It’s just that circumstances get twisted from several re-tellings from various opinions. And we all have our own version where we’re the good guy. So forgoing the tit for tat, I’ll say this – I really enjoyed my stay with the company and appreciate the opportunity it gave to me. And I think at this point TC will agree that we both could have handled things better, but they went down the way they went down, and it worked out for the best.
I was there from the beginning, the dot com thing was booming, and the site was getting attention. It was exciting to be a part of that. In fact, at one time TC and myself were writing mostly everything with pen names and an occasional guest author or interview. I felt like my work was an integral component of something special. A few of my articles made people re-think their perspective about diet, exercise and anabolic enhancement, and before long, I was a “name.” And at that time there was a lot of talk as to where the mag was headed and what it was going to be. But as things progressed I think what I was expecting had changed. And that was the cause of the conflict. email was new and communication got clumsy and misconstrued. My role had changed and I felt a bit as if the rug had been pulled out from under me. I wasn’t the “main guy” anymore. I get it though – that’s just business. Things change and you have to be part of a team. It wasn’t that I was demanding anything extraordinary or not accepting of any changes, it was simply a matter of trying to find my place, or more accurately, losing my “lead” position. No one likes being demoted. No one likes the “new guy” to get the promotion. So the long and short of it is , I dug my heels in a bit too much, and TC dug his heels in, and…well, he’s the boss. So I was let go. And even afterward we each took a few parting shots, which in retrospect was a little unfair because the other guy isn’t around to retort. But hey…we’re guys.
Now if anyone is still reading this you may wonder what happened to me. Glad you asked. I stayed writing for several bodybuilding magazines as well as music magazines, ghost writing a few best sellers autobiographies and working as a journalist for The Huffington Post. I developed several supplements that are still being sold today. I did some acting but mostly pursued my music career playing and producing. I will confess – I got tired of the bodybuilding scene. Not bodybuilding. The scene. The snobbery. The egos. And the egos didn’t come form the pro competitors. Most of them were pretty cool. It was mostly from the science nerds. They were cocky and nasty with overinflated opinions of themselves, many of whom lambasted me for my lack of scientific knowledge, yet in the long run, it turned out that most of my observations were indeed correct and they’re scientific evaluations were discredited. But that’s another story.
I still train and as a lark, a few years back I went to the well one more time and entered a masters bodybuilding competition. (That too is another story).
Bodybuilding is, was, and will always be a big part of my life. But I’ve said what I need to say. Anything I write now would just be repeating myself. I also no longer have the desire to fight with people who aren’t willing to accept any thought process that challenges their preconceptions. And that’s what I do. That’s what I did with Tmag. And when I was young and it was new, people took notice. Now I’m old and thought of as out of touch. That used to bother me. But now I realize that those people simply have to learn on their own time. Or not.
Life is good. I’m with a great lady, my son is a huge success and I have a beautiful grand daughter and grandson. I’ve taken my lumps but through it all I’ve accomplished more than I ever imagined. I’m where I’m supposed to be. And I like it. And I’ll venture to guess that TC and the gang are where they want to be. They made good.
So that’s it. Thank you for indulging me some closure. It was a spur of the moment thing and hopefully it will all make sense in the light of day.
Again, a thanks to TC. A toast to Charles. And a nod to the good old days.
Be well. Stay strong.