T Nation

Am I an Adult Now?


I just purchased my first car. I'm 21--yay getting hand me down cars from the parents. Am I an adult now?

It's a little bit scary to owe a bank 11k.


By law.. yes you are, but wether you are mature enough to take responsibility for your actions is anyones guess.

Preferably don't ask answers for the important questions in your life from the internet people.. We dont know you, but we might just want to fuck around with you.


Eaglescout maybe? Make sure you make your payments on time! Keep your credit in good standing son.



Eagle Scout indeed; I received it in 2003. I have a great credit score (696) right now, and I intend to keep it that way. I have a long term loan--60 months--so payments are affordable enough for me to be able to pay some extra.


You are well on your way. Congratulations on Eagle Scout and on the new car. It's a great feeling having your own ride. In a few years it will be a house.

Take care,



Do you have hair on your balls? If yes, then you are an adult. That's all it takes.



No. Not until you can take care of yourself and be responsible for other people's lives, either through work or having children etc... That's the way I see it anyway.


Well, if you were Jewish, you would have been a man for eight years now....


You will be tried as an Adult when you turn 18. As far as being a Man, a lot of guys never get there. Just do your best.


Any damn fool can buy a car. Paying it off is another thing. Personally, I subscribe to the hat rule. In short, if you are older than 18, which way do you wear your hat:

a) straight forward (as a adult man)
b) sideways (as an immature imbecile kid)
c) other (as you are still trying to figure out whether you are a or b).

So son, which way do you wear a hat?


Shit...I've been wearing my hat forward all my life.

I believe you're an adult when your 18. It's not an earned title or a matter of dealing with responsibility: it's a matter of whether or not you're going to be held accountable for your actions and what the world demands of you.

I think a better question to ponder is if you're a man or not.

Of course your definition of what it means to be an man and what it means to be an adult could be almost the same (minus gender). I don't really have anything insightful to say about that at this moment.


Honestly if it took you until 21 before you bought your first car instead of getting hand-me-downs you have a long way to go before you're an adult. I bought my own car in high school for $1500. Yeah it was cheap but it was mine.


You're not an adult until:

  1. You have a mortgage you can't afford.

  2. You have a wife who neuters you with her incessant nagging.

  3. You have your own kid, who thinks you're a complete joke.

  4. You are the proud owner of multiple maxed out credit cards.

  5. You sit alone drinking at a bar on a monday night, telling anyone who'll listen about how good you used to be.

  6. You have a mind numbing, soul sucking job you loath.

  7. You cry yourself to sleep at night wishing you were 21 again.

Enjoy the ride kid!


For the record, the "am I an adult now" question was mostly a joke. I feel mildly more grown up, but that's not a huge deal. I'm 21 for chrissake, I've been paying my own bills for a while now.

I don't wear a hat. Does that make a difference?

I didn't buy a car in high school because I inherited my parents '93 GMC safari van. I drove that shit into the ground. 240,000 miles and she blew a head gasket--myself and the parents decided it wasn't worth the money or time to bother fixing it. New car time.

Besides, I was far too busy putting together a guitar rig that was too big for anything I would ever play in during high school. I may not have bought a car, but I spent a good $5,000 buying guitars and amps (I was also a fat, stupid kid in high school. coincidence? maybe).


Dismal! I'm looking forward to it!


Buying your car early doesn't make you a man. He'd be stupid not to take a car offered to him. Refusing help to prove you're a "man"- that shows you still have growing up to do.

I'm not saying that was your situation, just saying getting a family car and waiting until you're 21 to get your own certainly doesn't disqualify you from adulthood.


When I turned 21 my dad reminded me that he knew men my age who led platoons in Vietnam. Blew my mind.


Of course it doesn't, but asking the question like he did at 21 does disqualify him. Even if it was a joke.

Truthfully you're not capable of being an adult until you are responsible enough to have children. That's the only way you'll ever know what real responsibility is. I'm not saying having children necessarily makes you an adult, but it certainly is a precursor in my opinion.


How about a mortgage. Im 20 and i bought my first house at 19, few months ago. I owe the bank $400k. In Australia we are recognized as adults at 18. Oh and 400 grand here is probably about $US330k. that kind of responsibility made an adult out of me pretty quick.

People mature into "adulthood" at different ages, we have all heard stories of kids who have been neglected and have to raise themselves. You cant tell me that kid isn't going to hit adulthood early.

I do agree that having a child to look after will definitely take it up a notch though.

...my 2 cents.


You can sell the house if you get in over your head...