A lot of guys think they're being alpha when really they're just overcompensating. Here are some traits to know if you're overcompensating or not:
Do you regularly try to bend people to your will for no other reason than to see if you can do it? For instance, do you ALWAYS have to be the guy who gets his way? If your friends are discussing where to go on a Friday night, does it ALWAYS have to be your club because you know a guy, and omg, these guys are so lame because they cant get us past the door guys like I can.
Do you look down on anybody who doesn't exhibit the same social value as you do? Other male friends of female friends in particular. Do you label him as an chump or chode and get a hard-on at how well you can dominate his frame?
Do you regularly refuse to supplicate to people even though theres no reason not to? Lets say your friends know of a live band they want to see on a Friday night and they insist that you come along. Do you feel compelled to ignore it and try to convince them to go elsewhere because you dont want to supplicate to their will?
Do you feel the need to dominate every conversation and social interaction youre involved in? Even if you dont really care about the topic or the people youre talking to?
Do you feel a desire to always be the center of attention? Do you always need to be the person whos doing the craziest, loudest, most outlandish, most attention-getting activity at any given time?
If you answered yes to more than one of these questions, you are not alpha. You are overcompensating.
In Texas theres a saying, The smallest dog barks the loudest I like to use the saying,The richest man doesnt have to tell people that hes rich.
Well, the most alpha guy doesnt need people to know how alpha he is. If hes alpha, it will be obvious. He wont have to prove it by dominating conversations and coercing people to supplicate to him.
Real charisma and dominance can be conveyed by not saying anything. A real Alpha Male understands that sometimes the best thing to say is nothing at all. A real leader doesnt lead through coercion and dominating others weakness, but by bringing out the best in those around him. He leaves people thinking, I like how I feel, how I am around that guy. Lets go back through those points above one-by-one and look at how REAL dominant behavior would behave
Why would you feel the need to bend people to your will if youre already confident in yourself and what you want?
Theres no reason to look down on others if you find and appreciate what others have to offer.
To refuse to supplicate to someone for no reason is to put more emphasis on their perception on you rather than your own.
Sometimes your best role in a social situation will be a facilitator, a support person or even just an observer.
Attention only provides short-term validation.