[quote]dollarbill44 wrote:
eengrms76 wrote:
6 months? Shit we can all move to Iraq by then. That way when they come to kill us all they only destroy Iraq. It’s a win-win situation…
Why not Iran?
DB[/quote]
Cause they got nukes dog, plus they got some ji-had and some crazy skills and stuf dog. Like they were born as ganster ji-hadists and have been training to whip some alien ass so they can get some virgins yo.
Thats what I read somewhere at least.
V
Aliens are coming and you expect people to start training to fight with their bare hands ? If this was beyond the scope of the world’s armed froces who would probably form an alliance, even the ‘bad guys’ like Iran and France would join the US, Britain, Australia etc etc then I would devote the time to ammasing as much weaponry and personal protection as possible.
Why worry about being able roundhouse kick an alien Chuck Norris Style when you can blow his fucking head off with a .50 Barret rifle or a Lee Enfield .303 ?
I’d prob get a fort built with mini guns and stuff and start selling stuff on ebay to be able to afford a challenger or abrams tank.
[quote]Vegita wrote:
dollarbill44 wrote:
eengrms76 wrote:
6 months? Shit we can all move to Iraq by then. That way when they come to kill us all they only destroy Iraq. It’s a win-win situation…
Why not Iran?
DB
Cause they got nukes dog, plus they got some ji-had and some crazy skills and stuf dog. Like they were born as ganster ji-hadists and have been training to whip some alien ass so they can get some virgins yo.
Thats what I read somewhere at least.
V[/quote]
When was Vegita kidnapped by Sasquatch99, the vien-iest and most-jacked dude ever?
[quote]dr stig wrote:
Aliens are coming and you expect people to start training to fight with their bare hands ? If this was beyond the scope of the world’s armed froces who would probably form an alliance, even the ‘bad guys’ like Iran and France would join the US, Britain, Australia etc etc then I would devote the time to ammasing as much weaponry and personal protection as possible.
Why worry about being able roundhouse kick an alien Chuck Norris Style when you can blow his fucking head off with a .50 Barret rifle or a Lee Enfield .303 ?
I’d prob get a fort built with mini guns and stuff and start selling stuff on ebay to be able to afford a challenger or abrams tank.
[/quote]
I would get water cannons. Didn’t you see “Signs”?
DB
[quote]dr stig wrote:
Why worry about being able roundhouse kick an alien Chuck Norris Style when you can blow his fucking head off with a .50 Barret rifle or a Lee Enfield .303?[/quote]
Because not only would roundhouse-kicking the alien blow his head up, it would also explode the heads of all other aliens from sheer amazement.
Well…I would def get my hand on some serious steroids and get fucking jacked to the point of disgust. Then, I would load up on canned chilli and ephesdrine tablets. And then, I would buy the most bad-ass guns and explosives and build myslef the biggest fucking intelligence bunker in all of Arizona. And then… I would kick some serious ass when the time came and smoke the crap outa some ugly aiens. Then I would get all the pussy in the world, if there was any left.
I’d have sex with the aliens.
Dude, I’d buy all the shitty music I could find… and a hella set of speakers!
As a precautionary measure I’d have a kickass party and rip up all the stop signs in the area… so when they came to my town maybe they’d not bother stopping.
I thought yodelling made their heads explode? Or is that only if Mars Attacks?
I would be doing what I’m doing now, which is basically preparing for the Zombie Apocolypse.
[quote]ManMeat wrote:
carter 12 wrote: I’m a big pussy and if it were to happen, I’d call Tom Cruise and ask him to be the father of my baby.
You can’t get anyone else to fight your battles. Which T-Nation contributors training program would you follow? How much conditioning versus strength do you think you’d need to combat aliens?
[/quote]
Did anybody else catch where this dumbass changed my quote to say “i’m a big pussy…”
He’s actually being serious with this question.
[quote]Massif wrote:
I would be doing what I’m doing now, which is basically preparing for the Zombie Apocolypse.
[/quote]
Yea man, fuck aliens. Zombie’s are the next real threat to civilization (hopefully!!!). Everytime my girl leaves the door unlocked I ask “what are you gonna do when the zombies come?”
[quote]carter12 wrote:
ManMeat wrote:
carter 12 wrote: I’m a big pussy and if it were to happen, I’d call Tom Cruise and ask him to be the father of my baby.
You can’t get anyone else to fight your battles. Which T-Nation contributors training program would you follow? How much conditioning versus strength do you think you’d need to combat aliens?
Did anybody else catch where this dumbass changed my quote to say “i’m a big pussy…”
He’s actually being serious with this question.
[/quote]
Hehe, that’s sneaky.
I’ve already built a bunker so HA! Actually it’s a room that’s half underground, but I’ve added 2 layers of walling for sound proofing.
[quote]carter12 wrote:
Did anybody else catch that i’m a dumbass AND a big pussy?[/quote]
Yeah, I gathered that. Between your lustful yearning for Tom Cruise and your inability to choose from the plethora of top-notch training programs here on T-Nation, those two character flaws are painfully obvious.
[quote]JOG wrote:
carter12 wrote:
Did anybody else catch that i’m a dumbass AND a big pussy?
Yeah, I gathered that. Between your lustful yearning for Tom Cruise and your inability to choose from the plethora of top-notch training programs here on T-Nation, those two character flaws are painfully obvious.[/quote]
Seriously Carter, everyone knows it’s not possible to change what someone else said. Stop being a scared little bitch and just answer the mans questions. Why is it that everytime we try to have an intelligent conversation about things that really matter in our daily lives, someone has to come in up here and start causin a rukus. For example, what is the velocity the human foot must reach during a roundhouse kick in order to achieve the desired result of alien head explosion? Anyone have that answer for me, Already in my training I have been able to explode watermelons mounted 4 feet high (all aliens are 4 ft tall right?) I think I need to be able to generate twice the force though.
V
[quote]Massif wrote:
I thought yodelling made their heads explode? Or is that only if Mars Attacks?
I would be doing what I’m doing now, which is basically preparing for the Zombie Apocolypse.
[/quote]
Damn right. My large food intake is going to give me the power to beat the zombies in their own game. That’s right, zombie bitches, I bite back.
On a related note, I think a zombie apocolypse thread is in order.
I’d take to the hills of L.A. and shack up with the local gangs.
Aliens would be stoopid to mess with the Bloods/Crips/Hazard/etc…
[quote]carter12 wrote:
OK I guess this is a hypothetical situation though at first I thought you were fucking serious.
If it were to happen, I’d call Tom Cruise.[/quote]
Maybe its not as hypothetical as you think…
http://www.prweb.com/releases/2005/11/prweb314382.htm
[quote]AlphaDragon wrote:
I’d take to the hills of L.A. and shack up with the local gangs.
Aliens would be stoopid to mess with the Bloods/Crips/Hazard/etc…[/quote]
Yea I’d head down to Paterson or Newark. They’d certainly be the last bastions still standing…being as they outgun the aliens.
[quote]Vegita wrote:
Did everyone forget that there is only one man needed to defeat an army of hostile aliens? Chuck Norris could roundhous kick an asteroid at thier ships long before they even got close to us, plus if he just wanted to have fun, he could let them land and them beat them all into submission and make them slaves fou the human race.
In case he had to go on vacation or something though, I would enter the Chuck Norris Training Camp, sure you only become 1/1,000th as tough as Chuck himself, but thats plenty enough to kick some alien ass. It’s a 6 week program specifically targeting the ability to roundhouse kick something or someone as hard as a locomotive train, oh and it’s also unblockable and it never misses it’s mark. Should two people attempt the kick on eachother, at the same time, both would die. Chuck norris can of course block his own kick so the above rules don’t apply to him.
V[/quote]
F’ing
hilarious!
[quote]Soldierslim wrote:
Yea man, fuck aliens. Zombie’s are the next real threat to civilization (hopefully!!!). Everytime my girl leaves the door unlocked I ask “what are you gonna do when the zombies come?”
[/quote]
Up the irons dude!