Absurd things we hear!

So I am sitting outside my house yesterday afternoon reading my book (Hocus Pocus by Kurt Vonnegut) and I hear that most absurd thing EVER! The local pool is right down the street from my house and the lifeguards use megaphones to talk to patrons and enforce the rules. I can hear just about everything:

“One at a time on the slide”
“Richie…stop peeing in the pool”

Well, this one takes the cake. I kid you not, I hear one of the lifeguards say, “Can you swim?” WOW!..haha

True story, 1981 I’m a senior in HS working as a life guard at a local lake. I’m out on a floating dock where the diving boards are watching the kids swim. Out comes a couple of guys, obviously brothers, one allot older the other about 13.

Older brother says “Go ahead jump off the board”
Younger brother “You sure about this”
Older brother “Hell ya”
Younger brother takes a running jump into the water. I watch and wait, No kid coming back up, I look at the older brother “He does know how to swim right?”
Older Brother “That’s what I’m doing now, teaching him how”
I had to go in after him and yank his dumb ass out. Threw both of htem out of the park, they were to stupid to stay.

Hmmm…how looney tunes…

Phatman that’s classic. Way to be a hero. Way to weaken the gene pool. Hehheh just kidding. :wink: