[quote]rainjack wrote:
LIFTICVSMAXIMVS wrote:
rainjack wrote:
My daughter will take a whipping, and never bat an eye. But take away her phone, computer, or ipod, You might as well have sent her to prison. My son can do without almost anything and do it standing on his head.
But he would do anything to avoid a paddling from dad. The only thing I can take away from him that comes close to swats is his 360, and his pickup.
I in no way mean the below criticism as a jab to your method of parenting but only raise these point because I am interested in human behavior and education and would like your feedback.
“Whipping” a 17 year old is in fact infantilization. One can spank a 4 year old and in some cases it can be effective to the 10 year old but after puberty children should be treated as adults would.
Punishment is not for punishment’s sake alone but rather to instill a sense of consequence; yes hitting an adult may work to instill this but at a cost of making them think it is how to one deals with conflict – not to mention he will always feel like a child in the parent’s presence.
There then comes a point when the child should understand the notion of consequence and that he will have to make a restitution for his actions to the person he wronged. That is how it works in the adult world. Childhood is merely practice for it.
Taking transportation and any means of a social life a child might have is probably the best thing there is as far as punishment for anti-social behavior goes.
All I really know is that “timeouts” do not work as a punishment.
When you say shit like, “this is not a jab”, and then prceed to lecture me on how I am fucking up my son - well - it’s a fucking jab.
Your ignorance of both the situation, and the subject at hand is appalling.
There are consequences for every action. Your stupidity in thinking that there are age limits on discipline is laughable. I have never used a fucking timeout, and you seem to think that it would work.
Kids are not small adults. They are lumps of clay that need to be molded and hardened. [/quote]
Children are human beings. They are not clay. Humans can be reasoned with and educated because we are capable of thinking. Clay can’t think because it is lifeless. [quote]
Sometimes that can be done quite easily, other times you have to use drastic measures. [/quote]
If beating on children worked you would only need to do it once and they would learn the lesson. Violence teaches the wrong lessons. [quote]
My dad beat the shit out of me when I was 23. I took a paddle and tanned my teenaged son’s ass. Why? You do not raise your hand to a woman. You damn sure don’t raise your hand to your mother. [/quote]
Why would he not think that is okay when all his life Daddy has been teaching him it’s okay to use violence on those who are smaller and weaker. Violence in the family is learned behaviour and it sounds like you and your father have been good teachers. [quote]
But yeah - I could see where sitting him in the corner would have taught him a very valuable lesson.
If you ever think I need your less-than-stellar parenting advice again, please reconsider and shut the fuck up.
No offense. [/quote]